First Times & Second Chances
by DaemonRider
Summary: Rachel is about to visit Quinn a second time during freshman year at Yale. They'll both be wishing for second chances before the weekend is over. A Faberry Week 2015 story. Canon through season 3 - episode 1, diverging after that.
1. Anticipation

**A/N** : This is dedicated to all the Faberry authors out there who have entertained me literally almost every night for the past 3 years: poetzproblem, WaveGoodbye, InvisiMeg, FerryBerry, Whispering Molly, isabella8848, … and SO many others. (Just look at my favorites list!) I love you all! Your brilliant, hard work has inspired me to finally give back and write my own. And that's something I can say with confidence that I _never_ would have done without your influence. So… on this last official tumblr-organized Faberry Week, I present to you my own contribution to the Faberry universe. Better late than never?

Love,  
Willa

 **WARNING** : blood, tears, and a healthy dose of angst make their appearance in this story. Sensitive readers beware. And don't say I didn't warn you. But this is Faberry. What else did you expect?

 **DISCLAIMER** : I do not own Glee or any of the Glee characters depicted herein. I only retain the rights to my own. 

* * *

**Chapter 1 - Anticipation**

* * *

 _College, Freshman Year_

"I can't believe I get to see you tomorrow! I really need this little break, even if it's just for one day."

Quinn smiled and shook her head at Rachel's enthusiasm as she looked up from her homework to her calendar above her desk. She still had a big heart on it with Rachel's name from when she visited her last.

"Rach, you were here two weeks ago. You already need a break?" replied Quinn into her phone as she took a sip of her jasmine tea.

"Well…" started Rachel.

"You're not losing the infamous Berry drive are you? Are you ill? Tell me you didn't get mono from a boy at NYADA," teased Quinn as she set down her teacup.

"Quinn! There is no _boy_ , and there is no illness," retorted Rachel. "I just want to see my friend again. I had such an amazing time with you, getting the whole Yale tour, seeing a little of New Haven - which Kurt is still jealous of by the way."

"Yeah, the only tour of New Haven that Kurt wants are the floors of the Gotham Citi and Afterlife night clubs," scoffed Quinn. "He needs to keep it in his pants."

"Oh, it's college, Quinn. It's what we're supposed to do. Get out and... go new places, try new things."

Quinn got up from her desk, giving up on her remaining homework for the night, and headed over to her bed with her tea in one hand and her phone in the other.

"Whatever," picked up Quinn after a moment. "So what new _thing_ do you want to try with me tomorrow?" Quinn immediately cringed and pinched the bridge of her nose at the awkward statement. "I mean… what would you like to do when you get here?"

Rachel laughed out loud, "Why, Quinn! So forward!"

Quinn's cheeks turned a shade rosier. "Shut it, Berry."

"Okay, okay. Umm, well I'd really like to go for another walk around the campus. Is there somewhere we could walk to and eat? Or maybe a quaint little bookstore you'd like to show me?" offered Rachel.

"Oh my gosh, yes! I just discovered another used book store that's not too far a walk. Should be a great day to stretch our legs. Then I was thinking… if it's okay with you, there's a party that Kyra's invited us to. It's Hawaiian themed and there'll be tropical drinks and dancing. Would you want to go?"

"Will I get a lei?"

Quinn spit out her tea while almost choking on it and heard Rachel cackling at the other end.

"Jesus, Rachel. You don't miss an opportunity, do you," Quinn finally managed as she got her breathing under control. At the same time, her petite roommate, Kyra walked in the door along with her taller friend, Hayley.

"An opportunity for what?" asked Hayley.

"An opportunity to kill me," replied Quinn, cringing again a moment later at her poor choice of words. She knew Rachel was very sensitive to the circumstances around Quinn's car accident not long ago, and would probably be feeling pangs of unnecessary guilt.

"Oh my god, you guys are still on the phone? You're going to see her tomorrow!" teased Kyra.

"Yeah yeah, we're just going over plans," retorted Quinn. "So Rachel, you okay with the party or do you just want to stay in and watch Netflix?"

"No! Rachel does _not_ want to stay in and watch Netflix on a Saturday night, she wants to come and party with us!" Kyra answered first, leaning into the phone. "Right, Rachel?"

"Hi Kyra!" chuckled Rachel. "And yes, that sounds like fun," Rachel said with a nod to herself.

"But she wants a lei," added Quinn.

"Kinky! I'm in," quipped Hayley as she sat down on Quinn's bed and waggled her eyebrows.

"Hayles, don't scare Rachel away before she even gets here," warned Kyra.

Hayley put up both hands in surrender. "Best behavior. Promise."

Quinn shook her head slowly at Hayley, disbelievingly. "Riiiight…"

"So Quinn," continued Rachel, "what should I wear up there? Is it getting cooler now?"

Quinn shifted up further on her bed as Hayley stood and wandered over to Quinn's dresser.

"Oh, it's supposed to be pretty nice this weekend. In the 70's I think. A bit cooler at night."

"Oh, nice. So what do you think you're going to wear to the party?" asked Rachel.

"Umm, probably my light blue flower dress." Quinn looked over at her closet. "And these new shoes, which Hayley wouldn't let me leave the store without buying." Quinn trained her eyes over to Hayley, who was picking through bottles of polish on Quinn's makeup tray, and stuck out her tongue at her when Hayley looked over with a smirk.

"Oh?" asked Rachel, intrigued by Quinn taking fashion advice from anyone. " _Do_ describe these fabulous shoes. Louboutin? Jimmy Choo?"

"Payless," chuckled Quinn. "They're open-toe wedges - ahh!" Quinn ended on a high note as she was startled when Hayley plopped down and grabbed one of her bare feet.

"You okay over there?" asked Rachel.

"Yes… it's just Hayley thinking she can grab my feet whenever she pleases and… apparently, paint my toenails," said Quinn, lifting an eyebrow and staring Hayley in the eyes.

"Oh, well that's…" started Rachel, a little unsure what to say. "I mean, I'm surprised you let her get away with that."

"She catches me off guard sometimes. Also, I don't want to spill nail polish on the bed."

Rachel was starting to get a little flustered, annoyed with the intrusion. Hayley always seemed to have impeccable timing in that regard.

"I should probably let you go then. I can't wait to see you tomorrow though."

"Me too, Rach," added Quinn.

"And I, um… I was hoping we would get the chance to talk. I really need to talk to you about something," said Rachel with renewed determination in her voice, not quite wishing to end the call like this.

"What about?" asked Quinn.

"It's something I need to talk about privately, i-in person… not over the phone," stuttered Rachel.

"Okay… are you _okay_?" worried Quinn, a little confused herself.

"Oh! Yes, of course. I just… I need to talk to a friend, and you're so wonderful to talk to. You're really special to me, Quinn."

"You're special to me too, Rach," Quinn tried her best and failed to say without giggling as Hayley teased a hand lightly under Quinn's foot, a devilish grin on her face.

"Good, I mean thanks." Rachel didn't understand _what_ was so funny. "I'll… I'll let you go. I'll see you tomorrow, Quinn."

"Can't wait. See you soon, Rachel."

Quinn looked down and smiled as she reached over to her bedside table and put down her phone. She then turned back up to look at Hayley as her trouble-making friend capped the first bottle and picked up a second color she had picked out, a look of exaggerated innocence on her face. Quinn pursed her lips and squinted her eyes… then picked up a throw pillow next to her and smacked Hayley on the face.

"Rude!" exclaimed Quinn as Hayley squealed.

* * *

Rachel looked absently at her phone, thinking about the conversation that had just transpired and frowning a bit. She was on the couch with Kurt, who was watching TV and eventually looked over at her when he sensed the quiet next to him.

"You okay, Rach? You look a little… well, not how you usually look when you've just talked to Quinn."

"Yeah," said Rachel with barely a nod and a little waver in her voice.

"Oh sweetie, what's wrong?"

Rachel's eyes began to well immediately as emotions rose to the surface and clenched at her heart.

"Nothing."

"Come on, you can tell me. Do I have to call Quinn back and threaten her long goldie locks?" said Kurt, setting down the remote and curling his hands around Rachel's arm next to him.

"No." Rachel shook her head lightly. "No, it's not her. It's just… I get the feeling like I'm too late, Kurt." Rachel looked over at Kurt with a tear making its way down from the corner of her eye. "I'm too late figuring out my feelings for Quinn and she's… she's already being swept away by Yale and… Hayley."

"Oh, Hayley's got nothing on you. You've got superstar talent and you've got history with Quinn and…"

"And I'm in New York and right now Hayley's on Quinn's bed." Rachel closed her eyes, trying to block out any further runaway imagination.

Kurt had no answer to that. They had talked before about the bouncy dancer Rachel had met the last time she visited Quinn – the one who seemed to be able to capture Quinn's attention anytime she walked in the room, with the 'gorgeous, wavy brown hair and never-ending smile'. So he leaned over and gave Rachel a hug.

"I'm sorry, sweetie. She sounds like an attention whore." This at least made Rachel crack a smirk. "But you know what? You are going to blow her away with your new makeover. If Quinn wasn't gay for Berry before…"

"I'm going to talk to her, Kurt," said Rachel as she wiped at her eyes and nodded resolutely. "This is it. I can't wait any longer. She needs to know now. _I_ need to know… if I even have a chance, or if I'm just going to forever be a 'good friend' to her."

"Rachel, I don't know…"

"No, Kurt! I can't… I can't lose her now. After all we've been through and… and all that we've left unsaid. I know there's something there between us. If you were only there two weeks ago. If you could've seen the way she looked into my eyes. I _know_ there was something there. I have to give her that opportunity to open up to me, to trust me. And to let her know that I'm feeling the same thing."

Kurt sighed. "But this is Quinn we're talking about. Even if she's open to a relationship with you, she'll have a _lot_ of pressure around her telling her to deny it, that it's a sin. And if she feels threatened? Rachel, she could turn on you in an instant. Don't pretend she hasn't done so before."

"I think you owe her more credit. A lot's changed in the last year, Kurt. She's a different woman now, and she's _not_ in Lima anymore."

Kurt looked at her longing, determined eyes and smiled, knowing that her mind was already made up. "Just… be careful. I want my roommate back in one piece."


	2. Alone Time

**A/N:** Thank you to **Valerii-FaberryFan** , my first reviewer EVER. Ha ha. Wow, that was fast, and you're really sweet. Yay Faberry Week!

OK, just so people know, I have 6 chapters written, in various stages of editing, which basically takes us through my original idea behind the "Second Chances" prompt. I wrote this as a challenge to myself and Faberry Week was the perfect motivation to keep me going and get as far as I did, when I did. So, thank you, organizers, for keeping it going as long as you have.

I would love to keep writing past chapter 6 and continue to explore this storyline, we'll see how my schedule goes. Reviews and constructive feedback will definitely encourage me and will be much appreciated, but I'm not going to go begging for them any more than the occasional 'please', nor will I hold chapters hostage for more reviews. LOL! OK, enough chit chat. Thanks for reading!

* * *

 **Chapter 2 – Alone Time**

* * *

Quinn came back from her shower to her phone ringing, her eyes lighting up in expectation of it being Rachel.

"I looked. It's just Finn… again!" said Kyra from her desk.

"Finn! What the fuck does he want?" sighed Quinn, her excitement deflated as she answered her phone. "What."

"Hey, Quinn!"

"Finn. To what do I owe the displeasure?"

"Huh?" said Finn after a pause.

"What do you want?" gruffed Quinn, bringing a hand to her forehead. "I'm going to be late picking up Rachel."

"Oh. I just. I was wondering if you could do me a favor."

"Seriously?" asked Quinn, incredulously.

"Well, it's about Rachel. And I figured since you guys have been talking a lot lately…"

"How do you know that?" interrupted Quinn.

"Rachel told me," responded Finn.

"Rachel told you…"

"Yeah! Over dinner last night."

"You and Rachel had dinner… last night…"

"Yeah, I had a long layover in New York yesterday so I called her up and we had dinner and we got to talking about friends and relationships and… well, I got the feeling like she wants to get back together with me."

"WHAT!?" yelled Quinn.

"I'm not sure. She was talking really fast and waving her hands around a lot. I got a little lost, and then I had to go, so… I was hoping you could talk to her when you see her today and find out for me, you know… girl-to-girl."

"Finn, I…"

"Please? I've been thinking of giving her – I mean us – a second chance."

"I've got to go. I'll talk to you later," sighed Quinn.

"Thanks, Quinn!"

Quinn stared blankly out her window down to the courtyard outside, which seemed so perfect and serene a minute ago.

"You okay, Quinn?" asked Kyra, delicately.

"Yeah. It's just Finn being a moron again, thinking Rachel wants him back. She's not that stupid though."

Quinn hoped she wouldn't have to talk Rachel out of doing something foolish with her life again. It brought back a pit in her stomach and way too many bad memories, but it was most likely Finn misinterpreting things again. Still, she couldn't help trying to assemble meaning out of some odd circumstances lately, like how Rachel seemed different on the phone lately – more emotionally charged, and the mysterious thing she said she wanted to talk about in person, not to mention her neglecting to bring up Finn's visit on the phone last night.

' _Oh god, Rachel,_ ' sighed Quinn with her head back in her hands. ' _What are you doing… Oh, shit! Rachel! I'm going to be late!_ '

Quinn quickly dressed and headed to the train station while working out her argument against all this nonsense, in case it became an unpleasant reality.

* * *

Quinn paced around the platform, waiting for the Metro-North train to arrive. She was still a little uneasy about Finn's phone call, but decided to wait and see if Rachel brought it up first. 'Hi Rachel. Why are you hiding your relationship with Finn again?' is not exactly how she wanted to greet her friend.

"Quinn!" came a voice from behind, startling her out of her thoughts.

Quinn swiveled around and found the girl making a beeline towards her. "Rachel! Oh my god, look at you!" said Quinn before she was wrapped in a tight hug.

"Surprise!" said Rachel, happy with the reaction as she stepped back and looked up at Quinn. "You like it?"

"You look incredible! I love the extensions and this new hair style. When did this happen?"

"Oh, just this week. Kurt's internship has its benefits for me too."

"I can see. And the outfit? You look straight out of a New York fashion magazine," admired Quinn as she checked out Rachel's black ensemble from head to toe. A scoop neck blouse, checkered shorts, and black boots were definitely a departure from the Barbra outfits.

Rachel blushed further. "Just having some fun with a new look."

"Trying to turn some Yale boys' heads?" smirked Quinn with an eyebrow lift.

Rachel gave a small smile back, "Something like that."

"Well, let's get going then! I thought we could drop your stuff off and then head out for a bite to eat. I'm starving!" replied Quinn.

* * *

Rachel was quietly relieved that Quinn's room was empty when they dropped off her overnight bag and changed into more comfortable walking shoes. She looked forward to seeing Kyra again later, but for now she just wanted to grab as much alone time with Quinn as possible. On the train ride up, she'd been working on multiple speeches that she could choose from to explain her feelings to Quinn, depending on the situation. While she couldn't be sure when the opportunity would arise, she was determined there would be one. She'd already set the stage during their phone call the night before, so she knew Quinn would be expecting her to speak up. The timing had to feel natural though. And inside, she was a nervous wreck about it. To her, explaining to someone that she felt open in terms of her sexual orientation, preferring not to define herself that way, was not a big deal for her. She hadn't really thought about why, that's just the way she felt. She probably had her open and loving fathers to thank for that, she figured. But knowing Quinn's upbringing on the matter, she was prepared for just about any reaction, including denial.

Rachel was in awe again as they walked from the dorm onto the extraordinary Yale campus. She felt encircled by the massive gothic architecture, and paused, breathing deeply to take it all in. Unlike the NYADA buildings that blended in to the city, there was no mistaking the feeling of being on a college campus here, surrounded by talent and tradition. She was so proud of Quinn, for everything she went through to get here. She couldn't help looking over at her and swallowing her in a big hug.

"What was that for?" chuckled Quinn when Rachel finally let go.

"Just… you, being here… I'm _so_ proud of you Quinn."

"Well, I seem to remember getting a lot of encouragement in my darker days from a certain someone standing next to me."

Rachel smiled even bigger and looked down with a blush in her cheeks.

"Why, exactly, when I was nothing but a royal bitch to you, I'll never understand. But here we are." Quinn smiled affectionately at Rachel when the brunette looked back up at her. Their eyes locked for a moment in a deep gaze as each felt the warmth of the other's soul. Then Quinn reached out her hand as a smirk lifted her lips, "Come on, little bear. Let's go eat!"

Rachel took her hand and laughed as they headed out together. "Little bear! You know, with those boots on I was almost the same height as you."

"Keep dreaming," shot back Quinn. "Is that why you bought them?"

"Absolutely not! And why a bear? Am I that cute and cuddly to you, or am I just annoying and intolerable?"

Quinn laughed out loud before answering her. "I'll let you guess and you can ask me again later."

The walk with Quinn continued to be as delightful as it started. They laughed about their college experiences and compared them to McKinley High. Rachel recounted her torturous dance lessons and the rudeness of her evil dance instructor, Cassandra July, reciting the latest insults and rude nicknames of the week. Quinn then described the surprisingly bold advances she endured from her English professor over the past couple weeks, and Rachel laughed until her sides hurt as Quinn re-enacted the pickup lines that guys in her class had tried to use on her.

Rachel was so wrapped up in the stories, she had forgotten entirely to ask Quinn if the café they were going to had Vegan-friendly options on the menu, but much to her delight when they arrived, it turned out Quinn had researched ahead of time and chosen a place specifically for her. She had even tried it out ahead of time, sampling an entrée herself earlier in the week. Rachel's heart fell that much further in love with the woman sitting in front of her, who never ceased to amaze her. She was not used to anyone besides her dads going out of their way for her like this. As they sat and ate, she let her mind drift into a daydream where she imagined they were on a date as a couple.

" _Happy anniversary, sweetheart!" cooed Quinn, wrapping her arms around Rachel from behind and giving her a kiss on the cheek before sitting down at the corner table of their favorite little restaurant in the SoHo district._

 _"Thank you. Happy anniversary to you, too," replied Rachel as she reached her arms up and around Quinn's neck, smiling into locks of long, blonde hair and taking in the familiar, vanilla scent of her girlfriend, not wanting to let her go. Quinn had no problem with that._

 _"Did you find the flowers I had sent to your dressing room? Or did they get lost amongst the dozens of other roses from your throngs of adoring fans?" teased Quinn._

 _"Quinn, you know very well that you are my biggest fan…_ _and_ _that I could not possibly mistake your flowers for anyone else's. No one else sends me a baby Gund bear who says 'I love you, Rachel' when you press his tummy."_

 _"Why, little bear, I wasn't sure you noticed," winked Quinn as she gently broke their embrace with a kiss on Rachel's lips before sitting down across from her._

 _Rachel squeezed her arms and shoulders together in her lap, unable to contain the wide smile as she looked into her lover's eyes, a blush spreading across her face._

 _"Speechless? Why, it's a Streisand miracle!" teased Quinn._

 _Quinn reached across the table and caressed Rachel's hand. "I love you, Rachel."_

 _I love you, Rachel._

"Rachel… earth to Rachel?" chuckled Quinn. "Hey, daydreamer, where'd you go?"

"Heaven," sighed Rachel with a smile stuck on her face throughout the rest of their meal.

' _Oh… I'm in deep,_ ' thought Rachel, breathing out a long breath as she watched Quinn go over to the counter and pay for the meal, as she had insisted on doing.

After lunch, Rachel insisted they go to the used bookstore that Quinn had mentioned. Quinn didn't want to bore her, but it was quite the opposite effect. Seeing Quinn's eyes light up at a rare book of poems was every bit as exhilarating as watching her sing and dance, she thought. Rachel didn't want it to ever end, and shook away the nagging thought that she might be getting in too deep to recover if Quinn were to reverse course now.

When they finally left the bookstore, it was very late in the afternoon. Time had flown by and Rachel could feel the cooler breeze of an autumn evening envelop her skin as she stepped outside. She panicked a little when she realized they'd not come any closer to a serious talk about anything, but she let it go. She'd been having so much fun with Quinn, she hadn't wanted to force anything heavier on the day. They would just have to find a quiet moment later that night to have a deeper conversation.

As they headed back to campus, Rachel looped her arms around one of Quinn's and rested her head against her shoulder in quiet contentment.

"Are you cold?" asked Quinn, leaning her head onto Rachel's.

"No, I'm fine now," replied Rachel.

They both smiled to themselves and said very little on the way home, just enjoying being in each other's company.


	3. Awkward

**Chapter 3 – Awkward**

* * *

When they arrived back at Quinn's room, it was just past six and Kyra was standing over her bed with several outfits laid out. Kyra's eyes brightened as they walked in the door.

"Rachelll!" shouted Kyra as she ran over and gave Rachel a hug. "Great to see you again!"

"Great to see you too," Rachel smiled into the hug, looking over at Quinn slightly surprised. She was definitely not used to getting this kind of greeting, not from someone she had just met, though she had felt like they had bonded pretty quickly that first weekend. The tiny brunette was actually a few inches shorter than Rachel, which Rachel secretly loved, and being an energetic drama major they found they had much in common. The three of them had all gone out to dinner the first night she was there and there was such a whirlwind of conversation between them, Quinn could barely get a word in, so she ended up sitting back and enjoying just listening to the two of them chatter on about dance classes and auditions. This was so unlike high school, Rachel felt like she was in a different world.

"So nice to have someone to take Quinn out for a walk," smirked Kyra.

"Excuse me?" shot back Quinn with a raised brow.

"We had a lovely day," said Rachel, absently caressing Quinn's shoulder. "We took a walk through the park, Quinn took me out to lunch, and then we went to a bookstore. She behaved very well."

"Hey!" complained Quinn as Kyra laughed. "I don't think I need to stand here and listen to this." Quinn turned and brushed her hand against Rachel's, sending tingles up Rachel's arm. "I'm going to go wash up so we can get ready to go. I'll be right back," said Quinn before picking up her hand towel and heading out the door for the bathroom down the hall.

"Okay," said Rachel softly, watching Quinn leave.

Kyra looked over at Rachel with a curious look. "Sooo… you and Quinn," said Kyra once Quinn had shut the door.

"We go back a long ways."

"I can't believe I missed it last time you were here," said Kyra, shaking her head slowly.

"Missed what?"

"You _like_ her."

"I… well of course, she's a great friend to me," replied Rachel, walking over to her overnight bag to get from under Kyra's gaze.

"You _know_ that's not what I'm talking about," continued Kyra. She walked over and put her arm on Rachel's when she didn't get any further response from the brunette. "Rachel, I think that's really sweet. You guys are awesome together."

"Please don't tell Quinn. I haven't…" started Rachel, still shocked at how quickly Kyra picked up on this. She thought she was being discreet. "I haven't told her and I'm a bit worried how she's going to take it when I do."

Kyra gasped. "Oh my god. Rach, are you going to tell her tonight?" asked Kyra, wide-eyed.

"Well… that was kind of the plan. Actually, I meant to talk to her on the walk today but… I just got so wrapped up in the feeling of being with her that I… I didn't quite get to it."

"Awww!" squeaked Kyra. "You guys are so cute! I totally ship you two."

"Thank you," said Rachel with a slight smile that vanished as she looked down again. "I feel like Quinn feels something too."

"Oh my god, Rachel, she talks about you all the time."

"That's good to hear."

"And I mean, she doesn't just talk about you. She's got this look in her eyes and genuine smile on her face whenever she tells us stories about you."

"Us?"

"Yeah, Hayley and…" Kyra paused, as if she said something she wasn't supposed to.

"That's, umm… that's the other thing I'm worried about."

Kyra grimaced slightly.

"Hayley likes Quinn too, doesn't she…" prodded Rachel.

"Well… yeah," said Kyra timidly.

"I knew it," sighed Rachel.

"Don't worry they're not, like, dating or anything. I don't even know where Quinn's interests are, really…" said Kyra. "I mean, I see her turn down both guys and girls all the time. It's a pretty liberal campus, if you know what I mean," smirked Kyra. "But I don't get any real reaction from her one way or another. I'm always sharing everything that's going on between me and Tim, but… she's not really opened up about anyone in return."

"I'm not surprised by that. I think Quinn's a bit frightened to admit any feelings right now."

They both were quiet for a moment, unsure of where to go from here, until Rachel had a realization.

"I'm sorry. Hayley is your best friend. I know this puts you in an awkward position."

"Don't worry about it. I'm going to wait offstage, until someone needs me to pick up the pieces."

* * *

"Did you run out of things to say behind my back that quickly?" asked Quinn, astonished at how quiet it was in the room when she returned from the bathroom. She thought for sure she'd find them both sitting on Kyra's bed, gabbing away. Instead, they were sitting on separate beds, hands in their laps, looking at her.

Rachel did her best to lighten the mood and gave a little chuckle at Quinn's comment. "I'm going to go wash up, myself. Be right back," said Rachel, grabbing another towel on the way out.

Quinn turned back to look at Kyra, crossing her hands in front of her. "What did you do?"

"Nothing!" retorted Kyra. "Help me decide what to wear."

Quinn sighed, but decided to drop it. She knew that tone from Kyra meant she wouldn't get anything out of her. She'd just have to ask Rachel about it later. Hayley was probably going to be over any minute, and the thought of her and Rachel in the same room was giving her knots in her stomach. They'd been friendly to one another the first time they'd met, or maybe civil was more accurate, but as the weekend went along, it was clear there was tension between the two. Their personalities seemed to clash, and both were very possessive of their time with Quinn.

On that thought, as if on cue, Hayley walked in the door looking… like sex from head to toe in a short hip-hugging light flower print dress that was laced up the side, exposing tanned skin in all directions.

"Hey Kyra."

"Whoa, fuck Hayley! You are dressed to kill tonight!" exclaimed Kyra.

Hayley walked slowly over to Quinn, smirking at Quinn's open mouth, and twirled into her personal space, whispering in a husky voice when she arrived inches from her lips, "Hi, Quinn. Like what you see?"

Quinn stood her ground and locked eyes with Hayley, refusing to give her the satisfaction of looking down at her highly glossed lips, and shook her head disbelievingly at the spectacle in front of her. It was enough to make Quinn pause before replying. "I think I just saw more than I should have."

Hayley laughed out loud at the drama she created, while Kyra just rolled her eyes. Then in a calculated maneuver, she put her right arm up to balance on Quinn's shoulder as she bent her left leg at the knee and looked down over her shoulder at her strappy heels. "Got new heels to go with, you like them?"

Just as Quinn was about to make a snarky comment on Hayley's choice of revealing clothing, Rachel walked in the door, pausing for a moment to absorb the scene in front of her. Hayley turned around, using the opportunity to casually slide her arm around Quinn's neck.

"Rachel! There you are, I was just about to ask where you were hiding," quipped Hayley.

Quinn stepped away from Hayley's casual stance and glared at her for her choice of greeting, while Rachel stood there, a stunned look on her now makeup-free face, unsure how to respond to any of the sensory overload she was currently experiencing.

Hayley quickly picked up on the awkwardness she'd created and apologized, "Fuck, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry, I started drinking when I was getting ready and, well, that was a long time ago."

"That's okay, Hayley, it's nice to see you," lied Rachel as she came further into the room with her show smile on. ' _Let the games begin_ ', thought Rachel to herself.

"That's actually a great idea, Hayles," Kyra said, trying to ignore the elephant in the room. "Get the shot glasses down. Tequila's in the bottom drawer. We needs a predrink!"

* * *

Kyra lifted everyone back into party spirits after the initial awkwardness that everyone felt and no one wanted to talk about. One drink turned into three and they were soon all laughing again. Rachel and Hayley were cool but pleasant to each other, but Rachel bristled every time Hayley put a hand on Quinn to brush an eyelash off her cheek or fix her hair. She knew she had no right to complain, but it felt like a slap in the face nonetheless. It didn't seem fair. Everyone knew Hayley liked to flirt and she did so openly with Quinn, while only Kyra had any idea how Rachel felt. Kyra tried to keep Hayley in check, but there was only so much she could do with her hands full getting ready.

An hour later, as Rachel and Kyra were finishing the last touches on their hair, Hayley excused herself to go to the bathroom down the hall. Quinn got up from her desk chair and immediately followed. "I'll be right back," she announced.

Kyra and Rachel looked at each other with raised eyebrows as Quinn left the room. She followed Hayley into the bathroom and looked around to make sure they could have a private conversation, then turned to look Hayley straight in the eye.

Hayley put up her hands in defense, "Look, before you say anything, I know I've been a little snippy with Rachel but I'm trying, Qui-"

"Rachel is my best friend, Hayley. The way you treat her is the way you treat me," interrupted Quinn, slowly emphasizing each word.

"I know, Quinn. I'm sorry. Really, I'm trying," replied Hayley with feeling in her voice.

"I think your flirting is bothering her."

"Why should it? You said-"

"I know what I said," interrupted Quinn. "It's just… today was different. She was very close to me, clingy almost, and it was really nice. When she looked into my eyes… I don't know, it was like she was trying to send me a message."

Hayley let out a sigh and dropped her hands by her side.

"Hayley… you know how I feel about her."

"And you know how I feel about you!" pleaded Hayley, her eyes starting to glisten ever so slightly.

"Look, I made it clear two weeks ago that you and I-"

"Could never start anything before you talk to Rachel," finished Hayley. "Yeah, I get that."

"I'm sorry… please understand. I just… I don't want to scare Rachel off right now."

"I think Rachel is a big girl and can handle herself. Maybe a little competition is just what she needs to light a fire under those feelings you think she has for you," offered Hayley with a cool smirk.

Quinn scoffed and rolled her eyes. "You're evil," she replied as she turned and walked out of the bathroom.

"No, I just know what I want," said Hayley quietly once she was alone.

* * *

 **A/N:** Thank you for continuing to read this far, and thank you for the reviews. I LOVE hearing from you. I'm always curious what stands out to readers. I would love to hear what your favorite line is, or what moved you. Thanks!


	4. Toxic

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews and follows, everyone. Now let's get this party started!

* * *

 **Chapter 4 – Toxic**

* * *

Hayley returned to the room a few minutes later, a little red-eyed, but faking enthusiasm. "Come on! Let's go party!"

The four of them headed out across the courtyard and down the road to the off-campus house. By the time they arrived, the party was already going full tilt, but their entrance didn't go unnoticed by those hanging out near the door. A number of guys waggled their eyes and commented on the four of them as they made their way in the entryway. Each were handed a (fake) flower lei, which led Rachel to pump her fist in triumph while the other three laughed, and they were given the verbal tour.

"Keg and tropical drinks in the kitchen, beer pong and karaoke downstairs. Have fun, ladies!"

Rachel's eyes widened as she heard the last part and she jumped up and down while grabbing Quinn's right arm. "Quinn!"

"I heard. Karaoke," said Quinn as she chuckled and smiled at the excitable brunette, while Hayley quietly rolled her eyes.

People chatted in groups around the first floor, but there was no one that any of them really knew, so they made their way back to the kitchen. Tim was going to be showing up a little later, Kyra had said, so in the meantime they all got Mai Tai's and eventually wandered downstairs.

Rachel frowned a little when they noticed the karaoke wasn't setup just yet, but the basement was rocking with a decent dance mix and a small crowd was hanging around the ping-pong table, cheering on the current participants in the beer pong game. Kyra spotted a few friends from her classes and head over to say hi, leaving the three of them looking around.

"I can't believe no one is dancing to this," said Hayley as she put down her drink and grabbed Quinn and Rachel's wrists. "Come on you guys, let's go."

Quinn put up resistance, complaining that she just got there and barely had any of her drink, but finally agreed after some persistent badgering. Rachel smiled and followed them over to the middle of what soon became a busy dance floor as others joined in. After a few songs, they took a break and saw that Tim had found Kyra, so they all headed over to say hi.

Rachel looked over at Quinn and held her back a bit while Hayley continued on.

"Hey, how is your back?" asked Rachel, concern in her voice. She knew that Quinn still felt the occasional twinge of pain in her back and legs, a carryover from the accident, and they had already been walking quite a bit today.

"I'm okay," smiled Quinn. "I'll let you know if I need a break."

Quinn was touched that Rachel knew her that well, and cared enough to ask. She was used to toughing it out and not saying anything, while paying for it later with agony and ibuprofen.

They joined their friends and Rachel got to meet Tim for the first time. He was a really sweet guy. Tall and lanky, which was kind of hilarious next to tiny little Kyra, but he moved with a confidence that Kyra just melted into. Kyra was excited to jump into a round of beer pong, so Rachel cheered them on along with the others as the two of them totally destroyed another couple. At least, she thought they did. She didn't really understand all the rules, but there was a lot of hooting and hollering going on, and the other couple was drinking a lot while Tim and Kyra high-fived, so obviously they were doing something right.

The game ended and Hayley immediately grabbed Quinn's arm.

"Let's go, Quinn!"

Hayley dragged Quinn over to the table and began egging on her friends. "Bring it on, Kyr. You guys are going down!"

The two girls proved to be formidable opponents as Tim and Kyra were quickly defeated. Another two stepped up and the crowd was beginning to get a bit larger and louder, enjoying Hayley's taunting and chest-bump celebrations with her partner in crime, Quinn. The two of them together were quite a spectacle to watch, owning the room and starting to visibly show signs of how much they had been drinking.

After another round ended, and then another, Rachel went over to Quinn and pleaded with her. "Hey, you want to come help me and find someone to plug in the karaoke? I'm dying to sing something."

"Wait! One more round, Quinnie!" interrupted Hayley, clearly drunk off her ass, which is right where Rachel felt like putting her at the moment.

Quinn staggered a little at Hayley's hands that were trying to pull her back to the table.

"Quinn, you've had a lot to drink. I'm a little worried that-"

"She's fine, Rach-ee," interrupted Hayley. "One more, I promise."

"I'm k, Rach. Go get the karo… the kar-oh-kee thing going," waved Quinn, stumbling over her words, "I'll join in a minute."

Hayley began taunting their next opponents who were setting up their beers on the other side of the table and Quinn turned away to join her.

Rachel huffed and frowned as she backed away. The night was starting to go like she feared – a Hayley power play for her girl appeared to be in progress – and Rachel felt powerless to intervene. She turned around and met Kyra's concerned eyes.

"Kyra, I…" started Rachel as she walked toward the other girl.

"I know, Rach. Let me handle this. Go upstairs and get someone to turn on the karaoke machine. I'll make sure they stop after this game."

Kyra couldn't help feeling sorry for Rachel when she had looked on and heard the whole exchange between the three, and then saw the look of utter despair on Rachel's face when she had turned around to walk away. She enjoyed seeing her best friend happy, but not like this in front of Rachel, not after what she heard earlier in her room. She wasn't sure what good the karaoke machine would do, but it seemed important to the brunette, so she went along with the plan.

Rachel stomped upstairs to find the host of the party whom she had met earlier. Surely they could plug in the machine now if she asked nicely. After all, why advertise it at the door if you're not going to use it? And if she could get Quinn singing with her, it would bring back all sorts of great memories for Quinn, even in her inebriated state, and she would cling to her the rest of the night. Or so Rachel's logic went. The only trouble was, she couldn't find the guy anywhere. She looked in the kitchen, the living room, even the backyard, and no one had seen him for a while. This was ridiculous, she thought. She was starting to feel foolish. Hopefully Kyra was more successful in getting Quinn away from all the beer. But oh god, what if Hayley and Quinn were now sitting down on a couch making out? Shit! Rachel felt an increased urgency to change how things were going when suddenly she heard a familiar song, soon followed by a familiar voice singing downstairs – unmistakably blonde.

' _You've got to be fucking kidding me,_ ' thought Rachel as she heard Quinn singing the opening chorus to **Toxic**.

 _ **Baby, can't you see**_

 _ **I'm calling**_

Of course she would figure out a way to get the karaoke going without her, probably with Hayley alongside her.

 _ **A girl like you should wear a warning**_

' _Wait, no! That's not how the gender goes in the song!_ ' screamed Rachel in her head.

But the crowd certainly seemed like they liked this version. Rachel started pushing her way to the stairs.

 _ **It's dangerous**_

 _ **I'm falling**_

 _ **There's no escape**_

 _ **I can't wait**_

 _ **I need a hit**_

 _ **Baby, give me it**_

 _ **You're dangerous**_

 _ **I'm loving it**_

Rachel was running downstairs now. This was _not_ happening without her! She made it to the bottom of the stairs and looked over at the makeshift platform stage in the corner of the basement. Sure enough, there were Quinn and Hayley. She was going to kill Kyra, but only because she wanted someone else to blame.

 _ **Too high**_

 _ **Can't come down**_

 _ **Losin' my head**_

 _ **Spinnin' 'round and 'round**_

The crowd laughed as Quinn and Hayley both spun around and fell into each other. They barely got out the next line as they tried to pull each other back up.

 _ **Do you feel me now?**_

Rachel was really starting to panic as she made her way closer to the stage, pulled in as if against her will by the nightmare scenario happening right in front of her. Quinn and Hayley were singing _way_ too close together now, and it was making Rachel physically ill.

 _ **Oh, the taste of your lips**_

 _ **I'm on a ride**_

 _ **You're toxic I'm slippin' under**_

 _ **With a taste of a poison paradise**_

 _ **I'm addicted to you**_

 _ **Don't you know that you're toxic?**_

Clearly they were just playing the crowd as they sang back and forth, and not to each other, right?

' _Wait, where are Quinn's shoes?_ ' Rachel shrieked to herself as she noticed her barefoot girl crush grinding around on stage like an exotic dancer. ' _Quinn is already taking off her clothes for her,_ ' Rachel thought, further panicking.

 _ **And I love what you do**_

 _ **Don't you know that you're toxic?**_

The rest of the song was all one jealous blur for Rachel. When it was over, Hayley gave a gigantic hug to Quinn as the crowd cheered. Quinn started looking around and her eyes lit up when she spotted Rachel, oblivious to the fuming that was going on in the brunette's head. She pushed out of Hayley's arms and jumped excitedly off the stage towards Rachel, swallowing her in a crushing hug when she reached her.

"Rachel! I got a guy to hook up the karaoke machine for us!" shouted Quinn, still bouncing from the song.

"So I see," said Rachel, finding it hard to stay at the peak of her jealous rage when she was being hugged by the girl she wanted most right now.

Though still somewhat intoxicated, Quinn was immediately picking up on Rachel's sullen demeanor. "Are you mad at me?" asked Quinn through pouty lips and sweaty blonde locks that were falling into her eyes.

Jesus, what Quinn did to her inside when she looked into Rachel's eyes like that. It wasn't fair, she was jelly in her arms.

"No, Quinn, I'm not really mad, I just want to spend the evening _with_ you," said Rachel. But she was not sure Quinn heard all of it because at that moment, Hayley had jumped down off the stage and crashed into them, wrapping her arm around Quinn's waist.

"Rachellll!" thundered Hayley. "Did you see us up there? I didn't know Quinn was such an awesome singer, did you?"

It took all of Rachel's willpower not to smack Hayley in the face. She took a deep breath but her chin was starting to quiver with pent up rage. Hayley was swaying a bit too much to notice, but not Quinn.

"Hey, Hayley. I think Rach and I are going to do the next song together. We'll meet up with you later, okay?" offered Quinn.

"Um. Sure, Quinnie," said Hayley, not quite able to keep her balance. "I'm going to go get us some drinks."

"Yeah, okay," said Quinn as Hayley stumbled away.

"I've got to get her to stop calling me that," said Quinn as she turned back to Rachel. "Rach, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong!?" questioned Rachel, stomping her foot and raising her voice. "Quinn, you played beer pong with Hayley for like a fucking hour, and when you wouldn't stop when I suggested we do something else, since you were obviously having too much fun with her, I went upstairs by _myself_ to get the karaoke turned on. And then, when I heard you start singing without me, I came downstairs to find you grinding with fucking _Hayley_. _That's_ what's _wrong_."

"Whoa, whoa… Rach, where is all this anger coming from?" asked Quinn, shocked at the language she just heard from her long time friend. "Look, I'm sorry, I got a bit carried away. I shouldn't have left you for so long-"

"I came here to see _you_ , Quinn. Not you and Hayley," asserted Rachel, a tear coming down from one eye now.

"Why, Rachel Berry. I think you're jealous." Quinn said jokingly, trying to lighten the mood, though not really thinking perfectly clearly yet through the alcoholic haze.

"No shit, Quinn."

"So, this would be a bad time to sing together?" offered Quinn, cringing a second later at her stupidity that was continuing to spill forth.

Rachel rolled her eyes and started turning away at Quinn's seemingly insensitive words. She just didn't seem like the same Quinn at the moment and she wasn't sure what was going on between them. She had been dangerously close to admitting her feelings for the blonde, right there on the dance floor, and all Quinn could do was crack stupid jokes.

Quinn grabbed Rachel's arm and turned her back around. "I'm sorry, Rach. I just, I think I need some air. It's so hot down here. Will you come upstairs with me? We'll go talk, okay?"

And just like that, it felt like her Quinn was back. Rachel didn't know what to do with this rollercoaster of emotions, but what else could she do? She still had Quinn by her side, who wasn't completely oblivious to what was going on, even if she was acting a bit off. Maybe there was hope for this night yet.

Quinn took Rachel's hand and gave her a smile, tilting her head towards the stairs. "Come on, little bear."

* * *

 **Song credit** : _Toxic_ , Britney Spears


	5. Let's Talk

**Chapter 5 – Let's Talk**

* * *

When they got to the top of the stairs, Quinn continued to hold Rachel's hand and pulled her towards the kitchen.

"Come on, I'm thirsty," said Quinn.

They made their way through the crowd towards the back of the house and into the kitchen. It was pretty big, with several people mulling about, drinking and talking. Thankfully to Rachel, Hayley was nowhere to be seen.

Quinn knew she might have pushed Rachel too far by spending so much time with Hayley instead of her, and was determined to hold on to the brunette for the rest of the night. Ruining such a great day with a series of drunken bad decisions was just not going to happen.

' _Better to make drunken good decisions!_ ' thought Quinn as she spotted what looked like berry margaritas. Maybe she wasn't fully thinking straight yet.

Quinn grabbed a margarita and offered one to Rachel. Rachel shook her head, frowning a little at the thought of more alcohol in Quinn's system, but then spotted a piña colada that looked irresistible, with a sliced pineapple hanging off the side and a little umbrella sticking on top. ' _Must be nice to be rich and privileged,_ ' thought Rachel, thinking of all the cheap keg parties Noah had back home.

"Let's go outside, Rach," said Quinn as she motioned to the back door.

Rachel followed her outside and into the cool night air, walking ahead across the short porch and down the steps to the backyard. It was a bit chilly, but after being downstairs in the hot, sweaty basement, it felt kind of refreshing. Sensing that Quinn hadn't followed her down to the yard, she turned around, letting out a frightened yelp at the statue that was off to one side of the steps. It looked like a troll or a gargoyle of some sort, with a nasty sneer on its ugly head. Who buys such awful-looking things? She looked up and noticed Quinn still on the porch, grabbing at the railing.

"Are you okay?" asked Rachel, a worried look again in her eyes.

"Yeah, just the rush of the air. Made me feel a little dizzy for a moment. I'm okay," replied Quinn with a slight grimace on her face.

Rachel came back up the stairs and stood in front of Quinn, leaning against the massive post that marked the end of the porch and the top of the stairs, still a couple feet away from Quinn. It was a little selfish, but after everything that happened downstairs, Rachel really wanted Quinn to make the first step forward if they were going to have a heart-to-heart.

They stood for a moment in silence, looking at each other. Quinn took a long sip of her margarita and smiled. The cool drink felt really good. She looked over at Rachel, who was now looking down at her feet.

"So, Rach, what's going on?"

Rachel took a moment to distill everything going on in her mind down to a manageable thought.

"I noticed Hayley has been flirting with you a lot tonight."

Quinn nodded and took a moment before replying. "Does that bother you?"

"I… I was just wondering. Quinn, is something going on between you two?" Rachel looked up into Quinn's eyes, trying to search for the truth while waiting for Quinn to answer.

It was not going to be that easy though. It never was with Quinn.

"I was going to ask you the same thing about Finn," replied Quinn.

"Finn?! Why?"

"Well, he called me on your way here. Had some interesting stories to tell."

' _Oh god, what had Finn said to her? Did Finn find out something from Kurt that he misinterpreted? No, Kurt would never talk to Finn about their private conversations._ ' Rachel's mind was panicking. Her mouth opened but words were not coming out. Why did tonight have to be so difficult?

Quinn picked up on Rachel's panicked look.

"Rachel, please tell me you're not going to waste your life getting involved with him again," sighed Quinn, worried that her worst fears were coming true.

"No! No no no! It's over between me and Finn. It has been for a while."

"Then why did he tell me that he thought you wanted to get back _together_ with him, over a _dinner_ the other night which somehow you failed to mention to me over the phone, or, you know, _all day today_?" Quinn inquired, her voice getting louder.

"Quinn, I assure you, I don't know how he got that impression. Yes, we had dinner, but it's not what you think. And as for not telling you, I just…"

"You _what_ , Rachel?"

"I was afraid to tell you _why_ I had dinner with him, because the truth is, I was trying to make sense of how I've been feeling about you lately. I was going through all the great memories I have from high school, and they all involve _you_ , Quinn. They all come back to _you_. And the thing is," Rachel stopped when she looked into Quinn's eyes, and began to shake at what she was about to say. She looked down to try to get a hold of herself. God, was she really going to do this now? "The thing is, I've recently realized that… that I'm falling in love with you, Qui-"

But Rachel couldn't finish the sentence. Quinn's red, icy, alcoholic drink was stinging her eyes and dripping down her neck, and low-cut top. She stood there for a moment, in sudden, all too familiar pain.

" _What the fuck!?_ " cried Rachel. She couldn't see through the red. It was blinding. All she could hear was laughter from bodies that had pushed past her after that insulting moment. She tried wiping her eyes a bit, and she saw what appeared to be Quinn walking back inside. She stood there, frozen, not believing that she had just been effectively slushied once again, awful memories starting to flood back from high school. Tears started pushing out the remaining foreign liquid from her eyes as she tried to make sense of what just happened. " _Quinn?_ " she called out with a quivering lower lip, but got no answer. Not that she could have heard anyway, the music sounded like it had just gotten louder. Or maybe that was the ringing in her ears. Had she really offended Quinn that much? Was she so disgusted by the idea of being with Rachel in that way that she had to lash out? She had _just_ told Kurt how much Quinn had changed, but… maybe it was all a façade. She couldn't believe that she had misread Quinn that badly, but this made no sense. She had to go find Quinn. Rachel headed back into the house, still dripping with crushed ice and mixed alcohol, in search of her so-called friend.

A moment later, Hayley came out the same door and found Quinn, kneeling on the ground with a couple guys nearby who looked concerned, but were keeping their distance.

"Dude, are you okay? We're sorry. We were pushed and you went flying into that other girl. It was awesome though, you took out the stone goblin," one of them was saying.

' _Fucking stone goblin… fucking assholes_ ' thought Quinn through the massive pain throbbing in her head. She remembered seeing the goblin and what looked like a glass tray that it was holding above its head as she was hurtling towards it. She looked down at her hand and saw a pool of blood, with more dripping down from her head, apparently.

"Jesus, Quinn. That looks bad. Can you get up?" asked Hayley.

' _Hayley's here… but Rachel isn't?_ ' wondered Quinn, confused.

She tried to recall the series of events that led to her ending up on all fours, holding her bleeding head in pain on the ground. She remembered the feeling of getting pushed… falling down the stairs… smashing her hand through the glass tray… and then head-butting the statue before meeting the dirt. Well, the guys were right, it must have been spectacular to watch. What was she missing, though…? She looked down at her shirt and saw some of her margarita dripping down her shirt. Her drink… oh god, she remembered her drink had splashed into Rachel as she went tumbling forward, a direct shot into her eyes. Some of it must have splashed back onto her, and Rachel had just told her… _oh god, she had to find Rachel NOW_.

"Hayley, where's Rachel?" demanded Quinn.

"I don't know, I think I saw her go inside a second ago and-"

"Hayley! Where. Is. Rachel," repeated Quinn.

"We'll go find her, but first we have to take care of your head, Quinn. Can you walk?"

"Yes," groaned Quinn as she got up, but then clutched Hayley's arm when she winced at the pain shooting up from her back, and leaving behind a bright red stain on Hayley's lacey sleeve.

She staggered a bit and then finally stood up straight. The pain was also coming from her hand now. She looked down and saw blood seeping out from a gash there and she cursed at the night sky. "FUCK!" This night was proceeding the way Quinn's life usually did, she thought, from one fucking catastrophe to another.

Hayley guided Quinn back inside and, despite Quinn's protests that she needed to find Rachel, convinced the still-bleeding blonde that she needed to hold still while Hayley examined the severity of her wounds. The cut on her head actually didn't look too bad in the kitchen light. The stream of blood was slowing with pressure from her right hand, but her left hand still appeared to have some glass in it. She guided Quinn forward, out of the kitchen, as people gawked at them, and up the stairs to the second floor bathroom to find a first aid kit where one of the onlookers had said it would be.

Quinn continued asking where Rachel was, and Hayley kept insisting that they take care of her hand first.

* * *

Rachel had wandered around the house for a bit, trying in vain to find the absent Quinn, but pretty soon the laughter of people noticing her predicament was getting to be too much. She decided to go to the bathroom and at least wash some of it off. God, this was too much like high school all over again. This was unbelievably embarrassing.

Rachel came out of the bathroom, somewhat cleaned up. Her top was probably ruined, but right now she couldn't care less. Fucking Quinn, where was she? Rachel wanted an explanation and she wanted it _now_. Finally, she found Kyra.

"Rachel! Oh my god, what happened?" asked Kyra.

"I… I don't know, Kyra. I'm trying to find Quinn. She threw her drink at me-"

"She _WHAT?_ " shouted Kyra, not believing what she was hearing.

"We were having a moment, or so I thought. I was trying to tell her how I feel about her and the next thing I know, her _fucking margarita_ is splashed in my face. I don't know what's going on. She left right after that and I am trying to find her before I go back to New York."

"Oh my god, Rachel, I'm so sorry."

"Have you seen her?" asked Rachel, tears starting to well in her eyes again.

"I… yeah, I just saw her, she… went upstairs with Hayley," said Kyra, looking up towards the second floor in confusion. This didn't make any sense, but Quinn and Hayley did seem to be getting it on pretty hot together downstairs. She just couldn't believe she would treat her friend like this, crush or not. This wasn't like Quinn at all.

"Un-fucking-believable," said Rachel, her face reddening by the second.

"Rach…" started Kyra.

"I'm leaving. Tell Quinn to go fuck herself."

Rachel regretted it the moment the words came out of her mouth, but she just couldn't handle it anymore. Sure, Quinn had no attachment to her, it's not like they were going out together, but this was just infuriating. How could she do this to her when they were getting along so well? How could she slushy her at her most vulnerable moment, and then grab her fuck-buddy and go upstairs for a quickie?

Rachel had heard enough. She demanded the keys to the room from Kyra, stormed out of the house, and headed back to the dorm to pack up and go home.


	6. Fix You

**A/N:** I know I've been on a chapter-per-week publishing schedule but after that last cliffhanger, I just couldn't wait to share the continuation, so.. here you go! Double chapter weekend everyone! Yes, I am weak..

* * *

 **Chapter 6 – Fix You**

* * *

Kyra tried shouting after Rachel to wait, but figured she better find Quinn and tell her off for ditching her guest like that, and then hopefully convince her to go run after Rachel before she left New Haven. Kyra checked all the bedrooms first, hoping to god not to find them in the throes of anything obscene. Finally, she found them when she knocked on the door of the bathroom at the end of the hall. Still, when she opened the door, Hayley was standing very close to Quinn by the sink, with her back to the door, in front of the blonde she needed to talk to urgently.

"Quinn, what the hell is going on?" shouted Kyra, reaching to push Hayley out of the way. "I just talked to Rachel and she – oh my god! Quinn, what happened to your head?!"

Hayley had put a butterfly bandage across Quinn's gash and covered it with another bandage, but Quinn still had angry red scrape marks on her left cheek and chin. Quinn explained what happened to her, and how badly she wanted to go find Rachel, while Hayley explained how she had insisted that she get the glass out of her hand first and at least tape her head wound closed if Quinn wasn't going to go to the hospital like she had suggested.

Kyra waved them both to stop and proceeded to quickly explain Rachel's version of the story to Quinn, and how she had just taken her keys to the room and was going to head back to New York. Quinn's eyes grew wide and scared, and she grabbed for her phone that she had tucked in her bra, wanting to smack herself for not using it earlier. She pulled the sticky device out of her cleavage and frantically dialed Rachel's number.

"Come on, pick up, pick up!" cried Quinn, her voice starting to waver thinking about how things were actually getting even worse.

There was no answer, and Quinn quickly tucked her phone back in her shirt.

"We are leaving and we are going to fix this. NOW!" yelled Quinn as she looked at her two friends.

The three of them rushed back to the dorm as best they could, but Quinn had to stop a couple times, wincing at the pain in her back and legs. She demanded from Kyra to know how many minutes had elapsed between the time Rachel left and the time Kyra found them in the bathroom, then tried adding that to the minutes they wasted in the bathroom listening to each other explain the complete fuck-up that was unfolding in front of them, plus the minutes Quinn stopped along the way, doubled over in pain, and calling Rachel. She tried again to get ahold of her, but again there was no answer.

She left another frantic voicemail, "Rachel, it's me. Please, please stop and listen to me before you go back to New York. What you think happened didn't happen like you think. I mean, I got pushed from behind and you must not have seen me go flying off the porch and… fuck… I don't know what's going on. Just please, come back to me so we can talk about this."

* * *

After the longest, most painful walk / run of her life, Quinn finally made it back to her dorm room. Rachel was not to be found, nor was her overnight bag. Quinn's heart clenched again as she guessed that Rachel was probably already on her way to the train station. How often did the trains run at night? Quinn tried to remember but she couldn't think clearly. She looked on her bed and then over to her dresser, hoping maybe she'd find a note, or something, but then noticed Rachel's metro pass still on the counter. This made no sense. Kyra said Rachel was heading back to New York, so why was her pass still here? Quinn grabbed it, playing out scenarios in her mind, thinking that maybe if Rachel returned to get it while she was out looking for her, she would at least be delayed a moment longer from catching the train while she purchased another ticket. Every moment counted now.

"This is not happening!" shouted Quinn at the top of her lungs. "This is not how the night is going to end!"

Uncertain what was going on, Quinn decided that going to the train station was still their best chance to find Rachel. Kyra immediately offered her a ride and the three of them headed to Kyra's car. They climbed in and Quinn silently wondered if the car would actually start, thinking _that_ would be the next thing to go wrong, but it started easily and they peeled out of the parking lot. Kyra pushed the speed limit as far as she dared, and Quinn started shaking in the front passenger seat while the tears finally let go.

"You guys, I can't lose her tonight. This night cannot end like this," cried Quinn, repeating what she said earlier in the room.

"I know, sweetie," said Kyra, "I'm driving as fast as I can. Why don't you try calling her again? Or send her a text?"

Quinn tried with no more success than any of the other times and threw her phone on the floor of the car. "Fuck!" exclaimed Quinn as she realized what she'd just done. Thankfully, the phone was still in one piece.

Hayley finally spoke up for the first time since they'd left the house. "Maybe she'll be okay when she cools off and gets back to New York. Then you can explain what happened. She'll understand, Q."

 _Q?! Who was she, fucking Santana now?_

Quinn glared at Hayley through tears. "You know very well why that's not an option," said Quinn through clenched teeth.

Kyra gave Quinn a confused look, but Quinn just shook her head.

* * *

When they arrived at the train station, Quinn jumped out of the car and sprinted to the platform, the other two catching up soon afterwards. Quinn looked up and down frantically, calling out Rachel's name, but heard and saw nothing short and brunette nearby. Quinn suggested they split up to look for her, and they headed in different directions to search the station. Quinn looked everywhere and was getting nowhere. She ran over to a ticket booth.

"Hey! Did the New York train just leave?" she asked the attendant.

"Uh, yeah. Three minutes ago."

Three minutes. They were just pulling up to the station three minutes ago! Quinn's head felt like it was going to explode. She had to get some air. She could still fix this, she thought, as she headed back to the front doors. She would get a hold of Rachel, maybe not tonight, but eventually. She would get a hold of her if she had to take a train down to New York herself, and she would fix this.

But this still didn't help the agony that she felt right now. Physically, emotionally, she was spent. She opened the door, went over to a bench just outside the station, and let out a blood-curdling scream at the top of her lungs, startling the few people catching a late train to who the fuck cares on a Saturday night, the night Rachel told her she was falling in love with her and Quinn slushied her in the face.

She sat down on the bench and sobbed, then picked up her phone again. Pointless to call Rachel now, she'd already left half a dozen messages. So she called the next best person who would understand her situation, who had been through some agony like this before.

"Santana?" cried Quinn into the phone.

"Hey, Q. What's up?" asked Santana, but then changed her tone when she heard Quinn's sobbing. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

Quinn explained the giant mess of a night as best she could, while Santana listened, getting the gist of what she was saying, even if she didn't understand everything through the heaving sobs. There was something about Hayley, and jealousy, and going outside. She rolled her eyes at the mention of Finn wanting to get back with Rachel. Loser. And then it was all waterworks and nothing was intelligible after that.

"Jesus, Q. I've never heard you get so choked up over Berry."

"Now," sniff, "Rachel thinks", sniff, "I'm disgusted by her," sniff.

"Pull it together, sweetie. I can't really understand you right now," said Santana, trying to be as gentle as she could while making sense of what Quinn had been telling her.

"My head is throbbing," sniff, "and my boobs are sticky," sniff.

"Gross! I don't want to know-"

"And all I want to do is just get a second chance," sniff, "I want to tell her that I love her back."

"You what?!" asked Santana, clearly not getting where that came from.

"I love her, Santana!" Quinn yelled, one hand gesturing up into the air as if this should be obvious. "Oh god, I'm falling in love, with Rachel Berry."

"Ay dios mio."

"Oh my god, that feels so good to say," cried Quinn, visibly shaking now. "I _love_ Rachel Berry!"

And then, from behind her, Quinn heard the voice she thought she'd never hear again, not for a long while.

"You love me?" said Rachel softly as she approached Quinn.

"I'm going to vomit," said Santana in reply, falling on deaf ears though as the phone hit the ground when Quinn jumped at the soft, sweet voice.

"Rachel!" exclaimed Quinn as she turned around to find not only Rachel but Hayley, of all people, standing next to her.

Rachel gasped at the bandages and cuts on Quinn's face while Quinn ran up to her and lifted her up off the ground.

"You're here! You're still here!" cried Quinn as she held on tight and spun the stunned but smiling brunette around in the air.

"Caught her buying a ticket to New York and convinced her she might want to talk to you first," said Hayley, a tiny smile painted on her face as Kyra came out the door next.

"Oh, thank GOD!" said Kyra, walking up next to Hayley.

Quinn put Rachel down, but refused to let her go, pulling her in tight. "Rach, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," sobbed Quinn into Rachel's hair. "I thought I lost you tonight."

"Shh, it's okay," Rachel soothed as she returned Quinn's hug. "Hayley explained to me what really happened. I'm sorry too, Quinn. I should've stayed and given you a chance to explain, but…"

"No, it's okay, I get it," Quinn pulled back and looked through watery eyes into Rachel's. "I'm just so glad you're here now."

"I am too," Rachel smiled back.

"And the answer's yes."

"Yes?" Rachel tilted her head and blinked her eyes in momentary confusion.

"I love you," whispered Quinn.

"Quinn…" Rachel gasped, one hand over her open mouth.

"I'm sorry that it's…" attempted Quinn, stumbling on a catch in her throat. "I'm sorry that it's taken me so long…" Quinn tried again, shaking her head and squeezing her eyes closed for a moment to stave off the rush of emotions from years of repression.

"Shh, I know…" Rachel moved her hand to Quinn's cheek, calming the blonde before she completely fell apart. Quinn opened her watery eyes to Rachel, who then reached up to wipe away a tear that was threatening to spill over. "You have forever to tell me," she added.

Rachel glanced down at Quinn's lips and leaned in, brushing them softly with her own.

"Okay?"

"Okay," replied Quinn, a smile spreading on her lips for the first time since the party.

Rachel looked back up adoringly into Quinn's eyes and returned the smile as Quinn wet her lips. Quinn tilted her head slightly, and Rachel put both arms around Quinn's neck as she pulled her into a deep kiss.

"Ow," whimpered Quinn.

"Sorry," winced Rachel as she began to pull away, but Quinn pulled her right back into another kiss.

"Ow," whimpered Quinn again.

* * *

Kyra smiled at the cuteness in quiet relief until her eyes suddenly grew wide as she realized what she was witnessing. "Oh! Uh… we'll be over by the car… whenever you're ready," proffered Kyra awkwardly as she grabbed Hayley's arm and turned her around.

"Oh my god, Hayley! This night could not get any more _epic_ ," Kyra emphasized in a whisper as they walked to the car. "I had no idea Quinn felt that way about Rachel."

Hayley smiled weakly and nodded.

"Oh sweetie, I'm sorry. This must be hard for you though," said Kyra with a sympathetic smile.

"I'm adjusting."

"You know, you're not as shocked as I… wait, did you _know_ Quinn had feelings for her?" asked Kyra, stopping Hayley suddenly in front of the car.

"Yeah. Quinn and I have, umm… we've talked."

"Oh my god! How long have you known?"

"A couple weeks," sighed Hayley.

"I guess she wasn't quite ready to tell me," said Kyra, curious as to what else she'd been missing.

"No, she wasn't ready to tell _anyone_."

Kyra and Hayley leaned against the car in silence, looking over occasionally to steal a glance at the new lovers who were still in each other's arms, kissing tenderly, almost timidly, under the lights of the station.

"This is still going to be difficult for her," Hayley spoke, breaking the silence and looking back to Kyra. "I don't think she's ready to fully come out yet."

"Really? Because…" Kyra tilted her head towards the public display of affection and raised her eyebrows.

"It's not that easy. Just… let her come to you," Hayley said as she looked over again at the couple. "Let her come to you," she repeated in a whisper as a tear rolled down her cheek.

* * *

 **A/N:** Ta da! So, that's the end of my pilot episode (i.e. where I stopped with this story originally). I have many more chapters outlined, but I also have ideas for new stories. I'm sure I'll end up doing both, but if anyone has any strong desire for me to continue with "episode 2" of this story first, let me know in a review or PM.

Thanks to all who have read this far. I love all the favorites and follows. Makes my day!


	7. Nurse

**A/N:** I appreciate all the lovely reviews calling for me to continue this story. That was great motivation to get me to start putting my outline into writing. This story has taken on a life of its own and there's much to be told! I haven't decided how far to go with this fic, but there will definitely be more than six more chapters! This next episode is all about the beginning of a romantic relationship that they so dramatically found out during episode 1 has been building for quite some time. :-)

* * *

 **Chapter 7 - Nurse**

* * *

It was nearly three AM before Quinn, Rachel, and Kyra made it back to the dorm. Quinn had wanted to come home directly from the train station, but Rachel insisted they go to the emergency room first to get the gashes on Quinn's head and hand checked out. Twenty stitches and four hours later, after saying goodnight to Hayley, they stumbled back into their room, bleary-eyed and exhausted.

"Oh my god, this night was insane," said Kyra as she dropped her keys on her dresser. "I've never been so happy to see my bed."

"Kyra, you're a savior and I love you, but if you ever invite me to another house party I will hurt you," Quinn groaned as she flopped onto her bed, feet dangling off the side, pulling her pillow over her head. Her head was still throbbing, and the light painkillers she took – she refused anything heavier because she didn't want to sleep through the rest of Rachel's short time here in New Haven – were starting to wear off, but the soft, cool pillow felt nice.

"What Quinn _means_ to say is _thank_ you so much for driving us all over town," added Rachel. "We owe you big time."

"Oh, pssh.." replied Kyra with a flick of her wrist. "Seeing Quinn spin you around like that at the station was completely worth it. I think it's the most I've seen her exert herself all semester."

"I hate you, Kyra," Quinn moaned from under a pillow as Rachel snickered.

"I know you do sweetie," smirked Kyra. "Listen, normally I would leave you two lovebirds alone on a night like this and crash at Tim's but I am so exhausted, I just want to collapse here. So, I hope you don't mind."

"Oh! I wouldn't think of asking you to leave!" exclaimed Rachel. "I think we could all use some sleep."

"After tonight's excitement, I'm going to sleep like a rock," said Kyra as she began changing out of her party clothes. "Do you think you can get that lump on the bed out of her dress?"

"Might be difficult, considering how she treated the doctors at the ER," quipped Rachel.

" _Nnnnnn_ ," moaned Quinn again. ' _What kind of friends make fun of a poor girl beaten by a goblin statue?'_ thought Quinn.

"But I think I'll manage," smiled Rachel as she walked over and sat down on the edge of Quinn's bed. "Perhaps she'd like me to be her nurse."

" _mmMMmm_ ," said Quinn, changing the tone of her voice. Okay, at least one friend will be forgiven tonight.

"Haha. Yeah that might work. I'm going to go get this makeup off and get ready for bed. Back in a few," said Kyra as she left the room.

"Okay," said Rachel, flashing a smile and then turning back to look at her disheveled patient.

Quinn rotated onto her uninjured right side and peeked under the pillow, giving Rachel a shy smile. "Hey."

"Hey yourself," smiled Rachel as she began rubbing light circles on Quinn's back.

"You're going to be my nurse?" inquired Quinn. "I like the sound of that."

"Only if you're a cooperative patient. Do you think that is in the realm of possibility?" joked Rachel with a light flutter of her eyelashes.

"Will it hurt?" frowned Quinn.

"I'll be gentle," whispered Rachel as she leaned down and gave Quinn a kiss on her arm, not wanting to risk hurting her by kissing her anywhere on the left side of her face.

"Okay," said Quinn softly, pulling her head out from under the pillow and placing it on top.

"You are too cute right now," said Rachel, shaking her head lightly.

"I'm bruised and bandaged," Quinn retorted.

"You're beautiful," countered Rachel, brushing a strand of blonde hair gently from Quinn's face and behind her ear.

Quinn blushed into a smile, helpless to argue any further when Rachel said things in that soft, yet insistent tone of voice. Rachel's touch never felt so pleasurable, now that she could let her in without feeling oppressive guilt or a sense of longing for something she could never have. Quinn looked intently into Rachel's eyes again. This was real...and it was actually happening! Well…at least in the privacy of her own room.

"Now come on and sit up," said Rachel after sharing a tender moment, eyes locked onto each other. "Let me help you out of that filthy dress."

"Noooo, I don't wanna move," grumbled Quinn, closing her eyes.

"Quinn, as your nurse, I must insist. I don't want to sleep next to a sticky, dirty girl."

Quinn snickered at the double entendre.

"Oh, you know what I mean," said Rachel as she gave Quinn a playful swat. "You're incorrigible. Now sit up!"

Quinn slowly did as she was told and pulled herself up, giving Rachel a quick kiss on the cheek once fully upright and enjoying the smile and rosy cheeks appearing on the brunette sitting next to her. The idea of sleeping next to Rachel was all the motivation she needed.

"I'm up. Unzip me?" Quinn breathed heavily and waggled her eyebrows to maximize the sultry yet cheesy effect.

"Quinn, if you insist on continuing to talk to me this way, I _will_ let go of the restraint I'm trying to show here, Kyra's eyes and your wounds be damned," Rachel chuckled, only half-joking, as she reached to the back of Quinn's flower-print dress and unzipped her – perhaps a little farther than strictly necessary.

Quinn reached up and swept Rachel's bangs back out of her eyes, then let her hand travel down to cup Rachel's chin. "Four years is a long time to repress, Rach," Quinn spoke candidly, looking into her eyes and then down to Rachel's lips. Oh fuck it, she's had much worse pain than this she reasoned as she closed in and tilted her head to lock lips with the brunette.

Rachel let out a squeak but soon relaxed into the kiss as Quinn pulled her closer with one hand around her waist and the other threading through her silky smooth hair.

Quinn had dreamed of kissing Rachel for years: while watching her perform on stage, listening to her sing in the choir room, lying awake at night unable to sleep, using her imagination as encouragement to her fingers. But now that it was happening for real, she couldn't help feel overwhelmed by all that her imagination had missed those years – the moan behind Rachel's returned kisses, the touch of her hands stroking down her arms as she opened her mouth to Quinn, the taste of Rachel's tongue as they played together for the first time. It was all mind-blowing and so, so _real_. Quinn twirled and explored for as long as she could until she finally pulled back to take in some much needed oxygen. She put her forehead together with Rachel's and drew in the heavenly, sweet smell of Rachel's oriental perfume. Jasmine, it smelled like. Jasmine and...well, strawberry margaritas. Quinn cringed at the memory from earlier tonight.

"Oh, baby, did that hurt? I'm sorry," cooed Rachel.

Quinn shook her head as her frown disappeared. "No, just had a flashback from earlier," Quinn looked back up into Rachel's saddened eyes and continued after a moment, "You called me baby."

"I...I did, didn't I," said Rachel. "It slipped out. Is...is that okay?"

"Yes, the way _you_ say it, it is," replied Quinn.

Rachel smiled widely and reached both arms up and pulled Quinn into a hug. "I like this," said Rachel softly, "Very much."

"I do too, little bear."

Rachel giggled, letting go of the hug but leaving her arms hanging loosely from Quinn's shoulders. A button on her own blouse must have caught on Quinn's dress though as it fell forward when Rachel pulled back, leaving Quinn's chest exposed. Just then, as fate would have it, Kyra walked in the room.

"Oh my god!" shrieked Kyra, covering her eyes with one hand. "I'm sorry!"

Startled, Quinn quickly pulled her dress back up to her chest as Rachel yanked her hands back into her lap.

"Jesus, you two. Okay, tomorrow morning we're going to have to go over some ground rules here, starting with the location of the Mardi Gras beads I put on the door handle when Tim and I are looking for some privacy," laughed Kyra as she observed the flustered couple trying to recover.

"Sorry, Kyra," blushed Rachel. "We were just caught up in a moment."

"And her blouse got caught up on my dress," added Quinn, smirking.

"Quinn!" admonished Rachel, blushing even further.

"I...don't need the details," replied Kyra, still chuckling and holding up one hand for them to stop.

"I think I will go get washed up and ready for bed myself," said Rachel, getting up from the bed. "I think Don Juanita here can get undressed the rest of the way, by herself."

"Aww, but I need my nurse to help me," whined Quinn.

"Your nurse will be right back, _if_ you're lucky," huffed Rachel with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Hurry," added Quinn as Rachel picked up a towel and supplies and headed out the door to the bathroom.

Kyra shook her head and chuckled to herself.

"What?!" demanded Quinn.

"Oh girl, you got it bad for her," sang Kyra.

"Shut up," smirked Quinn, without any urge to deny the accusation. All joking and wardrobe malfunctions aside, now that Quinn had basically outed herself in front of Kyra, she had expected there to be some awkwardness between them tonight, but instead her roomie was still being her ornery yet compassionate self. Maybe Hayley had already talked to her. She would have to have a talk with Kyra in the morning. Too much to handle right now.

Quinn changed into sleep clothes and mustered up the strength to join Rachel in the bathroom, doing the bare minimum of her nighttime ritual so she could quickly get back to bed.

When they got back to the room, Kyra was already out like a light. They crawled in to bed together and slipped their arms around each other, sliding in as close as comfortable, and lacking any more energy, drifted off into a sweet, sound sleep.


	8. Are We Doing This?

**A/N:** Sorry I'm a couple days late with this chapter, according to my plans. This chapter is twice as long as my usual though, and timeliness will always suffer before quality. Does that help make up for it? :-) Enjoy!

* * *

 **Chapter 8 – Are We Doing This?**

* * *

Gorgeous blonde tangles of hair lay tantalizingly across her face, begging to be brushed back to uncover the creamy soft cheeks and luscious neck hidden beneath. Rachel just wanted to run her hands through those tousled locks as Quinn slept beside her, pushing them back behind her ears so she could plant sweet kisses across that strong jaw and over to an ear lobe, then nibble her way down her neck. She had woken curled up next to Quinn, who was now lying partly on her side and leaning on her stomach, with one leg bent for support. It reminded her of a position she saw in a magazine describing comfortable positions for pregnant mothers to sleep in, which made it all the more endearing, knowing that Quinn had been… _was…_ a mother herself. Had she picked up this position from those months? It was sad to think how alone Quinn must have felt all those nights, no one to share a bed with and comfort her when she needed it. No one's hand to grab and place on her extended belly when she was awoken by little kicks at night. ' _Why couldn't we have realized our mutual attraction years ago?'_ she asked herself. Well, if last night was any indication, she was pretty sure it was mutual.

Rachel continued to stare at the angelic vision before her, letting out a contented sigh. She'd been wanting to gently reach over and touch Quinn for what seemed like an hour now, but she looked so peaceful lying there, Rachel was a little afraid to disturb the sleeping beauty. How would Quinn react the morning after a night like last night? Would she recant her declaration of love and dismiss her public displays of affection, blaming it all on the alcohol and the heat of the moment? Would she retreat to a protective shell of denial? Or worse, would she lash out at Rachel from embarrassment, undoing all the progress they had made as friends?

Then again, what if Quinn woke up with a smile on her face and pounced on her, pinning her down by the wrists and kissing her senseless until Kyra woke up and threw water on the two of them?! _Oh, THAT would be nice._

What should she even call Quinn now? Her BFF? Her girlfriend? Her 'romantic entanglement'? ' _Oh Rachel, don't be a dork_ ,' she chastised herself.

She had so many questions and her brain just would not shut up. She began to worry her lip as conflicting thoughts raced through her head and played tug of war with each other.

"Stop thinking so loudly," murmured Quinn without opening an eye, startling Rachel out of her thoughts. "I can hear you from here."

"Sorry," whispered Rachel, grimacing at the idea of disturbing Quinn's much needed recuperative sleep. "I..I didn't mean to wake you."

A smile stretched across Quinn's face as her eyelashes casually fluttered open to look warmly into Rachel's worried eyes. "I'm teasing, Rach. It's nice to wake up next to you, loud thoughts and all," said Quinn.

Rachel visibly let go of some of the tension that had stiffened her body.

Quinn leaned closer and popped a kiss on the brunette's lips. "Good morning, Rach."

"Good morning, Quinn," replied Rachel, pleasantly surprised at the immediate show of affection. Okay, so maybe today wouldn't be as bad as she feared. "How's your head feel?"

"Like I threw myself against a stone wall."

"Oh, baby…" Rachel cringed.

"Actually my hand is what hurts the most," Quinn winced as she looked at her bandaged stitches. "At least nothing's broken… so what were you stressing about, little bear?" asked Quinn, reaching over to stroke Rachel's cheek with the back of her fingers.

"Oh…nothing. Well, kind of everything I guess."

"Well that narrows it down."

"I couldn't sleep any longer. I have _so_ many questions running through my mind."

"Like?"

"Well, for starters, like which Quinn would wake up next to me."

" _Which_ Quinn?" scoffed Quinn.

"I must admit I was preparing myself for several possibilities," Rachel offered.

"I see," said Quinn as she slowly nodded her head to what she was hearing, pulling her arm back to her chest. "Am I really that unpredictable?" Quinn wondered aloud, though sounding like she already knew the answer.

"I worry that you might have second thoughts," replied Rachel. She really didn't want to start off their day putting Quinn on the defensive and risk her shutting down, but she had to know what this was between them. Was last night real? Did something really just happen between them?

"But last night-"

"Last night was a whirlwind of emotions, Quinn. And I don't know where we stand or what this is now," said Rachel as her voice trailed off.

Quinn lay in silent contemplation for a moment while Rachel fretted beside her.

' _Okay, Quinn…_ ' Rachel thought, trying not to look too desperate for reassurance, ' _this is where you assuage all my fears and tell me again that you love me and will never let me go._ '

"We should go for a walk, Rach," Quinn finally suggested. "I don't want to talk about this here."

"Oh…okay," Rachel agreed quietly, faking a smile on her face. ' _Of course,_ ' Rachel's inner dialogue continued, ' _silly me, I would have to be insane to think_ _that_ _a relationship with Quinn could be all sunshine and kittens._ '

"Come on," Quinn bumped her shoulder against Rachel's playfully. "I'm starving, and in need of drugs. Let's wake up Kyra and go get brunch."

Quinn bounced out of bed and trotted over to Kyra's.

"Right, let's get Kyra," Rachel sighed behind her. ' _Why talk about this now when we could wait until right before I go?_ '

Rachel sat up to once again follow Quinn's lead while Heart's song, _Alone_ , crept in to her head and began mocking her:

 _How do I get you alone?_

 _How do I get you alone?_

' _Oh, shut UP Ann Wilson!_ '

* * *

An hour later, Rachel was returning to their table in the dining hall with a bowl of fruit and a kale smoothie on her tray when she stopped dead in her tracks. Her jaw dropped in horror at the sickening display of unbridled passion that Kyra and Quinn (of all people!) were putting on before her eyes. The sound of lips smacking and moans of sheer ecstasy emanating from the two of them were unbearable to witness.

"Oh my god, Kyra, this is incredible!" groaned Quinn. "I've never had bacon this good."

"I know, right?!" agreed Kyra. "Maple-flavored bacon is unbelievable. I could eat a pound of it."

"Good thing it's all-you-can-eat then," added Quinn. "I'm going to get some more! Oh, hi Rach!"

"You guys are _disgusting,_ " Rachel grimaced before sitting down across from Kyra.

"I'm so happy to have a bacon-loving roomie," said Kyra before folding another piece into her mouth. "She's the best. No one else in my family will eat pork. All I could get my mom to make at home was turkey bacon. It's just not the same. _Mmmmm_ ," Kyra groaned in satisfaction.

"I suppose I'll have to learn how to cook it if Quinn ever comes down to New York to visit me. Do you think she'd notice if I bought meatless bacon instead and just soaked it in maple syrup?"

"That soy bacon? Fakon? Eww, gross. No. My mom tried that on me too. It's disgusting. It even looks fake," Kyra said, turning up her nose.

"Well, maybe she just didn't have the right spices and fresh herbs on hand to sprinkle in," suggested Rachel. Honestly, some people just didn't make an effort to do the proper research when it came to preparing alternative meals.

"Oh look!" Kyra sat up taller and waved. "Hayley's joining us!"

Rachel turned around and looked behind her shoulder just in time to find the tall brunette giving a hug to Quinn near the buffet tables. "Oh…yay," said Rachel dispassionately. She let herself stare just a little bit longer than customary. Logically she knew she should be thanking Hayley, and owed her for stopping her from buying a ticket for the next train last night, but how much of it really was Hayley's choice, anyway? When she was standing at the ticket counter, next in line, and happened to glance over to her right, Hayley looked almost startled when they recognized each other. What if Rachel hadn't looked over? Would Hayley have pretended not to see her and let her go back to New York? The sight of her hugging Quinn now was doing nothing to stop the knot forming in her stomach. She didn't think of herself as a jealous person, but with Quinn, somehow everything was different. She was already feeling possessive, and she didn't even know what they had together! This wasn't like her! She quickly turned back around when they broke from their embrace before they had a chance to catch her staring.

Kyra looked at her and her mouth started to move as if she wanted to say something, but then dropped her gaze down to her glass of orange juice instead, reaching over and taking a sip.

Rachel didn't have as much of an appetite any longer.

A few anxious moments later, Quinn and Hayley appeared at the table and sat down across from each other, Quinn sitting next to Rachel, thank goodness.

"Hi Kyra," said Hayley as she pulled in her chair. "Rachel."

"Hello Hayley. Nice to see you again," Rachel replied, pasting on a smile and using all her willpower to refrain from saying what was really on her mind at the sight of her.

"Nice to see you too. So sweet that you're still here," replied Hayley.

"I wouldn't dream of leaving Quinn alone when she is in need of medical care," Rachel countered.

"Oh, don't worry. We'll keep taking care of her when you're back in New York," smiled Hayley. "When _are_ you going back, anyway?"

"Tonight, I suppose," replied Rachel.

Rachel noticed Quinn looking back and forth between them, not moving a muscle, like she was ready to jump in between them at any moment. Honestly, Quinn should learn to have more faith in her control and acting ability. Rachel knew how to handle a threat like Hayley, and unlike certain boys in high school, she would not need to resort to any physical display of territorial dominance in public. This sort of thing could be handled verbally and discreetly, in private if necessary.

Quinn cleared her throat before the tennis match could devolve. "Rachel and I are going for a walk after brunch. What are you two doing today?"

"Tim and I are going to catch a movie later after I finish a paper for English," Kyra jumped in without delay. "Hayley, you're welcome to come with."

"Nah, that's okay. I've got a chem exam to study for. Quinn, you wanna drop by later when Rachel has gone? I can quiz you on our notes."

"Thanks, but I-"

"Excuse me," interrupted Rachel, her chair screeching back when she stood from the table. "This fruit isn't very appetizing. I'm going to see what else there is in the buffet."

Rachel picked up her tray and headed over to see what else she could find, dropping the bowl of fruit in the trash can as she passed by it. ' _Nice going, Rachel_ ,' she thought to herself. ' _Way to maintain control of the situation._ ' Obviously this was going to be more of a challenge than she thought. Maybe she was out of her league here. ' _Maybe I'm just not ready for the Ivy League_ ,' scoffed Rachel, chastising herself for her abrupt departure at the earliest signs of trouble.

She sighed and looked back over at the table she'd just left. It looked like Quinn and Hayley were in a heated argument, Hayley's hands flying up in the air in what appeared to be exasperation while Quinn sat with her arms crossed. It could be worse, she thought, they could just be laughing. She looked over the remains on the buffet table, deciding to go with a plain bagel, and then started looking for a toaster. ' _Oh Lord,_ _I wasn't prepared to go back into competitive mode,_ ' she thought. ' _I thought I'd left that behind when I graduated high school._ '

* * *

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Quinn demanded of Hayley when Rachel was out of earshot.

"Um…what do you mean?"

"'Don't worry, we'll take care of her when you're back in New York'," mimicked Quinn. "'Drop by later Quinn when Rachel's gone?' You're being extremely insensitive."

"Oh come on, Quinn. I didn't mean anything by it. Is her self-esteem really that fragile?" Hayley retorted.

"Bullshit, Hayley, you knew exactly what you were saying. You're abusing your power in this situation, and you know it. Show some tact for God's sake," Quinn commanded.

"I'm _trying_ , Quinn," said Hayley between clenched teeth, meeting Quinn's scowl. "Really, I am. This is just…not how I expected this weekend to turn out."

"Oh? What…Rachel actually _liking_ me? Gee, thanks for your support," glared Quinn.

"Okay, guys," Kyra interjected. "This is getting out of hand. Hayley, please, Quinn's right. Just think a little more about what you're saying, okay? You'll have plenty of time to work out whatever is going on between you two later, but let's not do it today while Quinn's _guest_ , _Rachel_ , is here? Please?!"

"Fine," sighed Hayley. "I'm sorry."

"It's not us you should be saying sorry to," said Quinn.

"What am I supposed to say, Quinn? 'Sorry my shitty feelings spilled over and ruined your breakfast'?"

"Yeah, actually, that would be a good start," Quinn sneered.

"Quinn! Please! Can we just finish our brunch? No more fighting today?" pleaded Kyra.

"I think I've had enough, actually," Quinn said as she stood from the table. "I'm going to go find Rachel."

* * *

"Hey Rach," said Quinn when she found Rachel at a corner table waiting for her bagel to toast.

"Hey," replied Rachel, her energy visibly deflated since they'd arrived. "Is everything okay? It looked kind of heated over there."

"Yeah. It's fine. Hayley's just…she's being petulant right now and you should ignore her. Okay?"

"She doesn't like me very much, does she," said Rachel knowingly, realizing this was an old and very familiar feeling.

"Don't worry about her. Come on, let's take that bagel to-go while we go for a walk. K?" said Quinn with a smile and a small bounce, reaching up and brushing down Rachel's arm until she linked her pinky with Rachel's.

Rachel chuckled at the gesture. All she needed now was a red skirt and white cheer shoes. "Okay, Santana."

Quinn gasped and put her other hand to her chest, feigning hurt. "You wound me."

That got a faint smile out of the sullen brunette, at least.

Quinn led Rachel out of the dining hall and into the warm sun, another unseasonably warm day for New Haven in October. The sun felt nice on Rachel's face, which was funny because obviously the sun had been out at some point in New York since she'd moved there a few months ago. She just didn't remember ever being aware of it like she was now. It complemented the serene atmosphere of the college campus. There were no car horns, no subway odors, plenty of space to move around. She could definitely see this being a nice escape to look forward to, if only a certain other woman wasn't bringing her down.

Then, as if New York could somehow sense her traitorous mind, Rachel's phone began playing Lady Gaga's "Born This Way".

"Oh! I forgot about Kurt," cringed Rachel. "I was supposed to call him back."

"Go ahead and take it if you want."

"No," Rachel shook her head. "I…I don't want to talk to him just yet. I'll just text him and tell him I'll call back later."

"And you've found that works with him?" Quinn chuckled incredulously.

"No, not particularly well," replied Rachel as she tapped out her text to Kurt.

Rachel: " _I'm fine. On a walk with Quinn. Call you later._ "

"But he has no other choice if I just refuse to pick up," continued Rachel.

"That's the Rachel I know. Taking control!" Quinn smiled.

Kurt: " _Are you sure that's safe? I hope you're not wearing something that stains._ "

Rachel scowled at Kurt's reply and tapped out another, punching the keys a little harder this time.

Rachel: " _Oh, ha ha Kurt. You're hilarious. I'll have you know she just defended my honor a few minutes ago."_

"I wonder what my ring tone is," pondered Quinn out loud, while Rachel seemed distracted.

Rachel: " _At least,_ _I think she did… I still need to get the details._ "

Kurt: " _Tell Quinn I'm still very mad at her. You deserve better, Rachel!_ "

Rachel huffed and thrust her phone in the back pocket of her short shorts. (Shorts in October! Who would've thought!) But not a second later it began ringing again.

"Ohhh! Who's calling me n-" started Rachel until she recognized "I Feel Pretty" playing as she pulled her phone out again, seeing Quinn's smiling face staring back at her from her lock screen.

"Awww," smiled Quinn. "That's sweet. I was expecting to hear Meredith Brooks singing 'Bitch'."

Rachel cackled and buried her face in Quinn's shoulder while Quinn sang a few verses:

" _I'm a bitch, I'm a lover._

 _I'm a child, I'm a mother._

 _I'm a sinner, I'm a saint._

 _I do not feel ashamed."_

Quinn stopped, her voice trailing off on the last line. Rachel looked up at her, keeping her head pressed to her arm, and then picked up where Quinn left off:

" _I'm your hell._

 _I'm your dream._

 _I'm nothing in between._

 _You know you wouldn't want it any other way._ "

Quinn laughed and shook her head as she looked down at Rachel. "Okay, this song is getting a little too real now."

Rachel's smile weakened as she looked down while they continued to walk.

"Too real?" asked Rachel, a little confused.

She didn't get an immediate answer so she tried again, "Is _this_ too real for you, Quinn?" she asked, motioning back and forth between them with her index finger.

"Yes…" replied Quinn, lost in thought, "NO!" she quickly added when she realized what she'd said.

"Well that narrows it down," Rachel responded evenly, echoing Quinn from this morning.

"I'm sorry. I guess I have a lot on my mind, too."

Quinn and Rachel looked at each other pensively, each trying to decide how to continue, until Quinn's phone started playing Darth Vader's Theme from Star Wars, completely breaking their train of thought.

"Oh, Christ," said Quinn as it was _her_ turn to pull her phone out of her back pocket.

Rachel giggled at the choice of music, "Who's that?"

"Santana," replied Quinn as she sent the call to voicemail.

Rachel laughed loudly, holding her belly, "You are such a nerd, Quinn Fabray!"

Quinn smirked. "She's been pestering me all day too. I think we both have some phone calls to make later."

"Um, yeah…on that note," Rachel began shyly. "In full disclosure, I may have called Kurt last night on the way to the train station."

"Of course you did," Quinn monotoned.

"And I may have told him, in confusion mind you, that you slushied me," Rachel said while biting her lower lip.

"Fuck...Rachel!" whined Quinn.

"Well what else was I supposed to think, Quinn? One minute I was sharing with you the most important thing I could ever tell someone in my life and the next I've got ice and vodka stinging my eyes."

"Tequila, actually, and yes, Rachel, I know how that must have felt. Believe me, I will _never_ stop apologizing to you for that and all the other crimes I committed against you in high school for as long as I live. But please, let's not make it a party joke just yet, okay?"

"I wasn't going t-"

"Uuuugh!" growled Quinn in exasperation as the Imperial March started playing again on her phone. "Okay, phones off!" ordered Quinn as she held down the power button on hers and shoved it back in her pocket. "The gossip girls can just wait. Let's go sit down under that tree, shall we?"

"Yes, Quinn," agreed Rachel demurely, giving her a timid smile. She didn't know why she was acting so shy around Quinn right now. It felt a little like she was back in high school again, though even back then there were plenty of times when she had stood her ground while the cheerleader was barking orders at her. Maybe thinking of slushies was catching her off guard. Or maybe it was just from feeling extremely vulnerable, sensing that everything was on the line right now, having been given a taste of what it was like to be affectionate with Quinn in a way she had only dreamed of, but uncertain as to whether this could really go anywhere. Would Quinn even be interested in a long distance relationship? Or was she about to let her down easily before it really got serious. Oh, god! What if this was 'the talk'? 'It's not you, Rachel, it's me. I can't handle the pressure of starting something with you right now.'

Rachel must have looked as petrified as she felt for Quinn to start soothing her as she pulled her down to sit by a knotted old red maple tree.

"Rach…hey. Talk to me. What are you thinking right now?"

"I…" Rachel stuttered and sighed. "I don't know where to begin."

"What's at the top?" suggested Quinn.

Rachel had to pause for a moment and collect her thoughts. What _was_ at the top of her mind? Oh, that's right…"Quinn, what are we doing?"

"We're finally talking…?" replied Quinn tentatively.

"No. Don't be obtuse. I mean us. You and me! Quinn, we each professed our love for each other last night. You…you kissed me and told me you loved me."

"Yes, I remember," Quinn smiled, her lip twitching up slightly, appearing to be happily replaying the moment in her head.

"Does that mean you…" tried Rachel, but a rush of emotions stopped her short when a lump caught in her throat. She looked into those beautiful hazel eyes gazing back at her and her lip began to quiver.

"Quinn, I need to know if you seriously want to begin a different kind of relationship with me, because I _do_ and-"

"Rach…" Quinn spoke softly as she inched closer, wrapping both hands around Rachel's.

Rachel pulled one hand out from Quinn's hold on her and swiped at the tears falling down her cheeks before continuing. "If we do this, I don't want to play mind games with you over the phone, trying to figure out if I'm only yours when I'm in town. I'm not good at sharing, Quinn."

Rachel let out a shaky laugh when Quinn smiled at her. "I'm serious! Just ask my dads," she added as she sniffed up her runny nose and looked down at her lap, putting her hands back on top of Quinn's again.

"And I want you to understand, this isn't some experiment for me, you know?" She looked into Quinn's eyes to drive her point home, "I really, _really_ like you."

"Rach, sweetie, listen to me. I love what's happening between us. It's a bit surreal, really."

Quinn laughed quietly and continued. "I'll be honest with you about something, the thought of coming out to my family scares the shit out of me right now. But there's no possible _way_ I could have waited another day, held on _one more second_ , to tell you what I've known in my heart for years – that I'm so freaking in love with you, Rachel Berry. I've dreamt of being with you like this for so long."

The floodgates in Rachel's eyes burst as she pulled Quinn into a sobbing, happy embrace.

"I freaked out last night on Hayley and Kyra when I heard you'd left – after what you'd admitted to me. That took a lot of courage, little bear. And that's why I'm always finding myself wanting to squeeze the _stuffing_ out of you!" Quinn laughed as she held on tight to Rachel. "You're so adorably cute in every way. I just want to hold you in my arms and take you everywhere I go. And then, at night, when we've gone everywhere and seen everything there is to see, I want to take you to bed with me and never let you go."

Rachel's sobs turned into teary-eyed laughter, and she pressed her wet cheek against Quinn's, squeezing her even tighter before she could let her go.

"I know the distance will be hard at times," continued Quinn. "But that's not stopped _this_ moment from happening, so, I really don't think it's something we can't handle. I want to do this. I've been waiting so long to tell you. I really, _really_ like you too."


	9. Panic

**A/N:** Shorter one this week, but I thought this one could stand alone, plus offer you something to think about. Chapter 10 is already well underway and should turn out to be much longer.

Also, thanks to several readers who pointed out my misattribution last week of the song, 'Bitch'. It's actually by Meredith Brooks. I've already corrected it for future readers!

And for all of you who hate Hayley. I promise this one is practically Hayley-free. ;-) Enjoy!

* * *

 **Chapter 9 – Panic**

* * *

" _Q, stop boning Berry and call me._ "

Quinn sighed at the latest in a long string of inappropriate texts from Santana. She'd only turned her phone on again to check the time. After cuddling with Rachel for a while by the shady maple tree, they were trying to figure how much time they had before they had to get Rachel back to the train station later that evening.

"Let me guess," smirked Rachel, "another one from Santana?"

"The one and only. I don't know why I'm still reading them," Quinn grumbled.

"Do you think maybe you should call her back?" asked Rachel. "You know…just so she'll leave you alone?"

"And give in to her provocations? I don't think so! She's just baiting me now," replied Quinn. Replying to Santana's offensive texts would only encourage her and set a dangerous precedent. She much preferred the idea of calling her back later on her own terms.

Rachel snickered and shook her head. "It's always a showdown between you two."

" _She's_ the one being impatient," insisted Quinn.

Quinn knew she was going to have to respond sooner or later, most likely sooner if the current rate of incoming text messages kept up, but that meant answering questions – ones that were very, very private and personal up until last night when in a moment of weakness she'd opened herself up to Santana. Sure, it would be cathartic eventually and her friend would be there for her always when it counted, but the first twenty minutes were bound to be filled with hobbit jokes and berry juice references, and she just wasn't ready for that.

Quinn shuddered at the thought, then jumped when the phone in her hand vibrated again. She knew it would be Santana again, however she was caught completely off guard by the new level of debauchery her former co-captain managed to reach, gasping at the picture she saw before her.

"What she'd say now?" laughed Rachel. "Can I see?" she added when Quinn didn't respond.

Quinn vigorously shook her head 'no' as she snapped the phone close to her chest while a crimson blush crept over her cheeks.

"Oh, it must be a good one. Come on… _pleeeease_?" Rachel pleaded.

"Ahh…it's not so much what she said as what she Photoshopped," replied Quinn.

"Really?!" replied Rachel with excitement in her eyes. "Oh! Kurt said her photo-editing skills have dramatically improved. Let me see!" she demanded.

Quinn continued to shake her head. "Noooo no no no, Rach," she refused, trying to dissuade the brunette, but an evil grin overtook Rachel's face – one that would rival the Grinch as he stood over Whoville and waited for all the Who's to cry 'boo who'.

Rachel stretched out her hands and began moving towards Quinn.

"Let me see your phone, Quinn," Rachel slowly commanded, grinning with intensity, eyes locked onto Quinn's now.

Quinn began backing up. "Rachel… sweetie, I know that look of determination in your eyes but you should just let it go. It's not going to hap-AHHH! Rachel!" Quinn screamed as Rachel lunged towards Quinn and thrust her hands under the blonde's shoulders, proceeding to tickle the life out of her. "NOOO!" Quinn continued to shriek as her knees buckled to the ground. NOOOOO! Rachel!" She squirmed and tried to hold on tight to the phone, laughing and squealing, until Rachel finally had her down on the grass, straddling her hips. "OKAY! OKAY! I give," cried Quinn when she couldn't take it anymore, still laughing until Rachel finally let up.

Rachel grinned triumphantly and held out an expectant hand.

Quinn glared with mock anger in her eyes, pursing her lips as she handed over her phone. "You'll pay for that Berry," she said but it was an empty threat. She was pleasantly surprised at this new level of physical contact. Not to mention this was a rather pleasant position she found herself in, able to feel the inside of Rachel's thighs pressing against her outer thighs. ' _This could be fun,_ ' she thought as Rachel's grin grew wider. She stared up into chocolatey brown eyes and a twitch from the corner of Quinn's lips betrayed her smitten mind.

With a satisfied tilt of her head, Rachel picked up where she left off. "Now let's see, what's so bad about Santana's text," Rachel stated as she began to study Quinn's phone.

She scrolled the message history back down to the end and found the last entry with a photo attached. Rachel's eyebrows lifted and she made a large 'oh' shape with her mouth as she looked at the pic of Quinn kneeling on the floor, probably drunk as she hammed it up for the camera. Her legs were spread slightly apart, her eyes closed, and both hands were clutching her breasts while a tongue was seductively mid-sweep across her lips.

"I've tried to delete that picture so many times from Santana's phone, god knows she's Photoshopped it a hundred different times, but the bitch must be keeping backups somewhere," Quinn seethed, her eyes pinched shut.

"Ohhh ho ho, Quinn, you naughty girl! Who were you thinking about when you…wait, what's that between your legs?" Rachel squinted and then zoomed in on that part of the edited photo.

"This time I'm going to delete her entire fucking hard drive," continued Quinn.

"Why would she put a bottle of Mike's Hard Berry Lemonade in between your… ohhhh…" Rachel covered her mouth with one hand once realization struck her. She zoomed back out and read the caption at the end of the text out loud, "Bitch better call me now or this gets posted to Facebook."

"Oh my god! Quinn, she wouldn't!" shrieked Rachel.

"No, she wouldn't. This is just Santana's way of saying she wants to talk and she really means it," sighed Quinn.

Rachel looked at her in horror. "Seriously Quinn, I'll never understand you two without an interpreter."

Quinn chuckled, "I know, now give me my phone back."

"No," Rachel replied casually as she tapped a few times on the phone.

"No? Rachel, what are you doing?" Quinn asked with a healthy mix of fear and uncertainty in her eyes.

"I'm playing this game my way," Rachel returned.

"Rachel, NO!" Quinn squirmed underneath her again and tried unsuccessfully to grab the phone away from Rachel as she heard the ringing, but it was too late. Rachel put the call on speaker when Santana answered on the third ring.

"Well well well, Blondie finally decided to return my call. I _thought_ that last text might finally get your panties in a twist."

"Actually this is Rachel calling, Santana. I've commandeered Quinn's phone."

"Gayberry! Oh, this is even better," replied Santana. "Where's Quinn?" Santana then gasped. "Did you wear her out already?"

"Fuck off, Santana. Stop twat-blocking our weekend. I will call you _later_ ," Quinn heaved, Rachel's weight still pressing down on her.

"The pressed lemon and the berry that finally squeezed her," Santana cackled. "Dios mío, I never thought the day would come. And from the sound of it, you haven't yet."

"That's none of your-" started Quinn before getting interrupted by Santana.

"As a matter of fact, Q, why _do_ you sound like you've got a weight on your chest?"

"Because I'm sitting on top of her," replied Rachel matter-of-factly.

Rachel flinched at the sudden howling of laughter coming from the phone while Quinn rolled her eyes. ' _There's another on a long list of what I'll be explaining to Santana when I call her back…IF I ever call her back,_ ' she sighed to herself.

Santana continued when she finally caught her breath, "Oh sweet virgin Mary, I wish Britts was here to witness this precious Fabgay moment. Now spill, I needs the deets. I only caught pieces of how it all went down in between Q's sobbing last night. And I kind of threw up in my mouth a little when I heard the midget's declaration of undying love, so you can skip all that-"

"Santana!" roared Rachel to interrupt. "I called simply to inform you that we _do not_ wish to be bothered any more this weekend by your childish texts and pornographic photos. Quinn will call you when she's ready and not until then. And furthermore, you will not _speak_ to anyone or _post_ anything about us _until_ then. ¿Entiendes?"

"'Entiendes'?!" Santana repeated, incredulously, before launching into a tirade. "No hablan español to me you freakish little hobbit! I will come up there and Lima-bitch-slap your tiny little-" ranted Santana until Rachel hung up on her.

"There," she smiled as she presented the phone to Quinn, as if proud of a job well done. "Now you don't have to worry about calling her today!" Rachel declared in a singsong voice.

"I can't believe you just did that," Quinn replied as she stared up in astonishment at Rachel, half-pissed for getting Santana riled up, but admirably shocked that she would actually speak to one of her high school bullies like that. Maybe she wouldn't have to worry about Rachel's feelings getting hurt by Hayley's catty verbal jabs. Then again, face-to-face contact required a whole new level of chutzpah.

"You're welcome. Now, where were we?" Rachel asked, leaning over so that her hair made a curtain that almost touched Quinn's face.

"You were about to kiss me," Quinn replied hopefully as her eyes glanced down to Rachel's lips.

"Quinn…" responded Rachel with her mouth hanging open for a moment. "Really? Right here in public?"

"Do it before I change my mind, Berry."

Rachel wasted no more time and leaned over all the way, using her hands for support on either side of Quinn's head, and planted a soft kiss on the blonde's lips. She stopped and looked tentatively into Quinn's eyes as if to make sure the contact was acceptable. Quinn responded by reaching up and threading her fingers through Rachel's hair along the side of her head until she could firmly but gently pull Rachel's lips back down to make contact once again, tilting her own head and holding the brunette's firmly in place. Quinn pressed deeper into the kiss, causing Rachel to let out a soft moan of approval. Rachel's lips were the wettest, fullest lips she'd ever kissed. It was such a turn on to taste fruit-flavored lip balm instead of aftershave and stubble. This was a dream come true and she never wanted it to stop. Quinn's stomach was collecting butterflies and the tingling sensation was moving lower. This was definitely getting passionate and they should probably…

"Woooo! Yeah!" yelled out a classmate while another catcalled.

"Stop," commanded Quinn to Rachel as she pushed up on the girl's shoulders to put some distance between them.

"Quinn, I'm sorry, I thought you were okay with-"

"This was a mistake. Please get off me," Quinn said softly but firmly as she tried to contain the panic screaming inside her.

Rachel scrambled up and stood in front of her, holding out a hand to help Quinn up.

Quinn sat up and thrust her hands to the ground, shifting her legs so she was kneeling, and took a couple deep breaths as she closed eyes. When she opened them a moment later, she looked up into worried eyes and an outstretched hand. Rachel was standing there patiently, worrying her lip and waiting to see how she would react. Quinn felt a sudden rush of memories of all the times that she must have led Rachel to feel like that and decided to make a change, for her sake.

"I'm sorry, Rach. I didn't mean it like that," Quinn sighed. "I panicked."

Quinn took Rachel's hand and let her pull her up.

"I-I understand," replied Rachel gently. "We haven't really talked about…well, you know…how each of us is dealing with coming out. Are you okay? Are… _we_ going to be okay?"


	10. Coming Out

**A/N:** OK, I'm going to stop trying to predict future chapter lengths. I do have a long term plan for this fic, so don't worry about that. I just can't seem to accurately predict chapter breaks.

Also, I really appreciate the feedback in the reviews. As a first-time fanfic writer, I'm very interested to know how people are receiving my work, and the feedback helps me to know if I'm on target, especially in a fic like this where the backstory is revealed over time. Thanks go to some recent reviewers who definitely seem to have picked up on some key points so far.

 **icesk8er:** Yup, they sure do have a lot to work through. I find it interesting to play with what happens when they've been in love with each other for so long without the other knowing it. You've got this internal love each has for the other that's kind of advanced, while at the same time their outward expression of it is so new. And yes, Quinn and Santana's conversations will always be lively and strangely supportive, even if the support will at times be 'tough love'.

 **RachelBarbraBerry:** Yes! Small steps, Quinn. She has trust issues, as in she doesn't trust people to accept her for who she is. I do actually have character growth in mind for her. Rachel will definitely help with that.

And finally, I've updated the story summary to include the statement that I may start to diverge from canon after around season 3 episode 1. I picked that point because personally that's where I start feeling unhappy with the choices the show made with Quinn's character. So for the purposes of this fic, I would like to think that Rachel had more to do with pulling Quinn out of her skank phase. And for two, I'm claiming that the real reason Quinn is a mess senior year is that she finally admits to herself that she is gay but is too scared to come out. I don't know how much of that particular backstory will come out in this fic, so I thought for those who might be interested I'd mention it here.

Sorry to those who don't like long author's notes. I always enjoy reading such notes myself.

* * *

 **Chapter 10 – Coming Out**

* * *

Quinn tried to make light of the heavy conversation by strolling back to the paved path and casually flipping her wrist, "Don't worry, I'm not going to run away _that_ easily."

Rachel smiled with concern as she started following Quinn. "When _would_ you start running away?" she inquired delicately when she caught up to the blonde.

"What?" Quinn asked, twisting her head towards Rachel in confusion. "Oh…no, I just meant I'm not going to do something stupid the moment I feel scared. We're not in high school any longer."

Rachel nodded her head but remained silent. They reached the path and Quinn turned to her. "So Rach, left or right? Where do we go from here?" Quinn smirked and looked over at Rachel expectantly.

Rachel's smile grew more earnest and replied, "Well, I don't know if I'm ready to break out into a song, but would it be too boring if we went back to the same café that we visited yesterday? I could go for a cup of tea."

"The café it is then," nodded Quinn in agreement.

They walked in silence for a few minutes on the winding, tree-covered path to the café. She felt the brush of Rachel's hand a few times while they were walking and she knew Rachel was probably hinting that she'd like to hold her hand. Quinn would have loved nothing more than to entwine her fingers with Rachel's, which was why she felt like she was letting her down when she pulled back each time instead, finding other ways to occupy her hands. She knew she was sending mixed messages and this must be very confusing for Rachel. After all, she had just been lying on the ground, with Rachel on top, making out with her! Yet she couldn't even hold her hand now?

The thing of it was, she'd let herself get lost in Rachel's presence. Everything and everyone around her disappeared in that moment, and it was just the two of them. That's all she really wanted, to be alone with Rachel and share the deepest thoughts and feelings that she'd been keeping to herself all these years. _Rachel_ … talented and driven, voice like an angel, lips soft and full, a smile that melted her on the spot when it was directed her way. No one else was invited to this reverie!

But then they were rudely interrupted and reality came crashing down around her. A private moment had turned into a spectacle for people to judge and react to, and this was exactly the kind of attention she didn't want. She wasn't doing anything immoral or wrong! What right did they have to insinuate that what she was doing was a sin?! Wasn't that between her and her God?

She was still shaken.

Rachel finally spoke to break the silence. "Quinn? I'm getting the feeling that you're still a little freaked out about what happened back there."

"I'm okay," replied Quinn.

Rachel looked at her skeptically.

"Really, Rach. I'll be fine."

Quinn cringed inside, knowing that would not be enough. Not for Rachel. She _deserved_ more from Quinn. She tried again, "Okay. I'm a little scared, to be perfectly honest."

"That's okay, Quinn. I understand, really I do. The important thing is, you're opening up about it!" Rachel replied with encouragement. "Have you talked to…many other people about these feelings? A therapist?"

Quinn looked over at Rachel with an 'are you kidding' raise of her eyebrow.

"Okay, dumb question," Rachel chuckled. "But selfishly, I have to say, I like that you're talking to me."

Rachel smiled and put her arms around one of Quinn's in a side hug, holding on as they walked. Somehow, while entwining their hands in public was a little out of her comfort zone, Rachel holding on to her like this had a very calming effect. Quinn couldn't figure herself out.

"So who have you talked to, Rach? What was it like for you to come out?" asked Quinn.

"I've only confided in Kurt and Doctor Schlessinger."

"Doctor Schlessing–"

"My therapist," replied Rachel.

' _Of course,_ ' thought Quinn. Rachel _would_ be the first of all her former Glee classmates who she would suspect to have a regular therapist.

"Kurt's only known for the past couple months. Do you remember, after Finn and I broke up last summer, how much you and I started hanging out?"

"Best summer of my life, Rach," Quinn smiled thinking of all the memories of going to Cedar Park, the beach, the pool… ' _mmm, the bikinis, dat ass!_ ' She started imagining what next summer would be like as her…girlfriend?

"Well, I guess you could say the realities of leaving Ohio caught up to me by the end of the summer. One day Kurt and I were sitting out by your pool and you had gone inside to get us some refreshments. He made some flippant remark to me about how much I was going to miss being waited upon by Quinn Fabray and it just hit me all of a sudden. I burst into tears and told him I was heartbroken at the thought of leaving you and that I might be falling for you."

"Awww! Actually I think I remember that day," said Quinn. "I came outside and your eyes were all red and you said it was from the chlorine, which…didn't really make sense to me since I didn't remember you going into the pool…"

"Yeah. I lied," admitted Rachel. "I wasn't sure if what I was feeling could be real. I've never been attracted to any other woman. I thought maybe it had something to do with all the attention you were giving me. I don't know. I just knew I wasn't ready to risk everything between us to talk to you about it then. It'd been such a great summer…"

"Yeah…" sighed Quinn.

Rachel leaned her head on Quinn's shoulder and continued. "Kurt's been very supportive though. Well, mostly. I'll admit he's been very protective of me and a little wary of your…intentions, given our history."

Quinn rolled her eyes. Last night's phone call wouldn't have helped that any.

"I told Doctor Schlessinger about these feelings soon after telling Kurt, but I think he's known for quite some time. He didn't seem at all surprised. He's the one that helped me come to the conclusion that, if I had to put a label on my sexual orientation, I would describe it as pansexual. I don't have any predispositions. Anyway, I haven't told my dad or daddy yet because…well I hadn't sorted out everything until recently, and I knew they would be the most inquisitive of anyone."

Rachel continued, "So what about you? Who did you first come out to? If you don't mind me asking."

Quinn cleared her throat first before responding. "Hayley. A few weeks ago, actually."

"Oh," said Rachel flatly, masking any emotions running through her head. She dropped her arms back to her own side as they continued to walk. "I guess that makes sense since she's…"

"Gay?"

" _In love with you,_ " Rachel corrected.

There it was. Quinn could always count on Rachel to bring things out in the open, wearing her heart on her sleeve at the same time. She closed her eyes and swallowed the fear rising in her throat. "Rach, I don't want to talk about Hayley right now. This is not about her."

"I beg to differ, Quinn. I think part of this is."

"And how is that?" asked Quinn, getting a little agitated.

"The fact that you came out to her instead of someone who you've known for much longer like Santana or Mercedes has to mean _something_."

"What? Jesus! Okay, if we must involve her, I chose Hayley to confide in because I needed someone to talk to after you left last time. I was really sad and depressed and I knew exactly why. Ironically," Quinn chuckled, "it was because I had such a good time with _you_ that weekend, I didn't want it to end… _ever_ ," Quinn began to tear up as the weighty feelings of that weekend came rushing back. "I wanted so much more from you, but I was convinced, after all the years I've known you, that these were feelings you would never be able to reciprocate. So…I was desperate to talk to someone about them. I felt like I was going to burst if I just continued to keep them to myself. And I knew I could trust her not to laugh in my face or lecture me about the sins of my ways when…" Quinn's voice slipped an octave as she choked back her emotions. "When I came out for the _first time_ … and told someone I'm gay."

"Oh baby, I'm so proud of you, really I am" said Rachel as she comforted Quinn with a hug.

Quinn brushed back some of the tears that had fallen and continued, "She encouraged me to talk to you, actually, and not hold back the truth any longer."

"I'll bet she did," Rachel smirked.

"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Quinn, fearfully searching Rachel's eyes for understanding.

Rachel sighed for a moment and looked down before she spoke softly. "Quinn, you're not going to deny the fact that she's interested in you, are you?"

"No, but I don't have any interest in her!" stated Quinn desperately.

"I never said you did," said Rachel as she looked back up into Quinn's eyes. "Be that as it may, that right there gives me reason to doubt that her intentions with you were completely innocent that night."

"That doesn't matter!" countered Quinn, "It still helped to have someone to talk to!"

"That doesn't… _what_?" asked Rachel, confused. "Yes, it _does_ matter, Quinn!" implored Rachel. "And what did you tell her?" she reminded Quinn, "You told her that you wanted more from me, but were pretty sure I would never feel the same way. I'm sure it became obvious to her that I was the roadblock in the way of you getting on with your emotional life, allowing yourself to have feelings for someone else. So what better way to get you to move on than to convince you to spill everything to me. Get my supposedly inevitable rejection over with so that you could go back and have a good cry on her shoulder and realize that your hang up with me was pointless. And then she could swoop in and pick up all the pieces."

"Rach, I…" tried Quinn, but she had so many emotions swirling around in her mind that she couldn't quite get herself composed enough to respond. She knew what Rachel was saying was probably true. No…who was she kidding, it was chillingly spot on. There was nothing to argue about. The only problem was that it was only half of the naked truth of what happened that night. Quinn's tears continued to flow as she thought about everything else that'd been said and done – choices she made – _stupid_ choices – that she didn't want Rachel to know. It would devastate her.

It doesn't matter though, Quinn told herself. It happened before she was with Rachel, Hayley swore herself to secrecy about that night, and most importantly, Rachel was absolutely the one she wanted to be with.

"Lucky for me I got to you first before she could dig her claws in, right?" Rachel smiled sweetly as she pulled Quinn into a hug.

"I don't deserve you," cried Quinn as she returned the hug, holding her tightly as she sniffed up her last tears.

"Well, you've _got_ me," replied Rachel.

' _Oh god, I'm a horrible person,_ ' thought Quinn.


	11. A Challenge

**Chapter 11 – A Challenge**

* * *

 _Rachel heard a knock on her dressing room door and instantly broke into a knowing smile as she put down her brush._

" _Come in!" she begged._

" _Rachel, there's a Quinn Fabray here to see you. May I let her in?" inquired the stagehand._

" _Yes! Yes! Of course!" rushed Rachel. She would have to call a meeting with all the stagehands tomorrow and circulate a picture of Quinn so that they would not have to go through this formality every time Quinn came to see her show._

 _A moment later, the love of her life, a vision of beauty in a light blue, formal dress walked in the door. Blonde hair was pinned back behind her ears, showing off a dangling pair of diamond earrings, while a smile puffed out her rosy cheeks._

" _Oh! Miss Berry! Thank you SO much for seeing me!" joked Quinn, clapping her hands on either side of her face in mock adoration. "I'm your biggest fan."_

 _Rachel was delighted to play along. "Oh, the pleasure is mine!" And boy, was it… "I'm always happy to meet my adoring fans. Now tell me," she continued as she stood up from her makeup chair, "what did you think of my opening night performance? Was I brilliant, or simply outstanding?" asked Rachel as she approached the blonde, batting her eyelashes at her._

" _Brilliant, outstanding, AND dazzling…as always," replied Quinn._

" _Charmer," returned Rachel with a sideways glance._

 _Quinn laughed and pulled Rachel into a warm hug, holding on tight. "Oh sweetheart, you were absolutely breathtaking. I couldn't take my eyes off of you."_

" _Aww, baby thank you. I'm so happy you were able to make it."_

" _Are you kidding? There's nowhere else I'd rather be tonight," gushed Quinn._

" _No one else you'd rather be with?"_

" _You know there's no one else for me. I've missed you so much, Rachel," Quinn cooed._

 _Rachel…_

"Rachel…" chuckled Quinn.

"Oh, sorry!" Rachel shook herself out of her daydream. "What did you say?"

"I just said 'I'm back. Did you miss me?'" Quinn repeated as she sat back down at their booth in the café. "Clearly you didn't," she added with a lift of her eyebrow.

Rachel ignored the silly accusation. "It was just a little daydream."

"Again? That's twice in a row here. Is it something in the air?" Quinn smirked but then switched to a heavy sigh. "Or maybe I'm just boring you…"

"Yes, I'm afraid that's true," said Rachel as she put a hand to her forehead in dramatic Hollywood fashion. "I _dream_ of my freedom from this terrible ennui. I am trapped. Bored to tears in your presence."

Quinn frowned and deflated visibly in mock sadness.

"Awww… you faker. I don't believe that pout for a minute. You are sitting across from the _champion_ of pouting. You are in so much trouble dating me. You're not going to be _able_ to resist…wait, why are you smiling like that?"

Quinn's smile only grew wider. "Well for one, I like hearing you say that we're dating. That's something I will _always_ smile about. And two, you're just _so cute_ when you're under the illusion that your pout has any effect on me. Now come on, little bear, I already paid," Quinn finished, standing abruptly from her seat before Rachel could start her rebuttal.

"Lucy Quinn Fabray! I said _I_ was going to pay this time! And how dare you doubt the power of my full lip pout. I have been using it to get my way since I was two!"

"I never agreed to your demands to pay, I simply _entertained_ the idea. And I have had four years to study your techniques of coercion and build up my immunity," Quinn retorted, turning towards Rachel and bending over slightly to look into her eyes. "Good luck."

"Ohh-ho, you are _on_ Fabray. You have just earned bedroom eyes on _top_ of my infamous pout the next time I want something from you, lady" Rachel added as they walked out the door together, oblivious to the customers near the door staring at them and listening in on their peculiar conversation.

* * *

Leaving the café, they found it was getting a little cooler and overcast. The autumn air was definitely starting to win out over the unusually long summer they'd had. Still, they didn't want to head back just yet, so they decided to take a stroll down the quaint little New Haven street, lined with tiny shops and a wide variety of restaurants. Rachel took delight in pointing out all the places she wanted to try the next time she was in town. One more thing to look forward to, she thought, instead of dwelling on having to say goodbye later tonight. She made a mental note to begin listing the virtues, for Quinn, of transferring to a school in New York, like Columbia or NYU.

When they came upon a pet store with tabby kittens playing in the window, Rachel grabbed Quinn's hand and dragged her over.

"Ohhh!" Rachel cooed. "Quinn, look! Kitties!"

They were so tiny, they couldn't have been more than a month or two old.

"They're _adorable_. Do you think they're brothers and sisters?" wondered Rachel.

"Hmm," hummed Quinn, "those two sure fight like they are."

"Would you ever want kittens when you get an apartment?"

"Kittens grow up to be cats, and cats couldn't care less about you, Rach. They're all 'feed me and leave me alone'."

"Not the cats my grandmother has. I think it's just a matter of how much love and attention you give them when they're growing up," suggested Rachel.

"Well, that might explain why our cat was so skittish. Half the people in our house hated the poor thing."

"You had a cat growing up?" asked Rachel.

"Only until I was about five, then it disappeared," Quinn sighed.

Quinn looked over longingly at the puppies in the next window. "I wouldn't mind a cat, but what I'd love some day is a little puppy, like maybe a pug or a chow chow. I want a pet that will be happy to see me when I come home, and go to the park with me."

Rachel looked over at Quinn and smiled as she watched her tap on the window to get a little golden retriever's attention.

"Hey, buddy," Quinn called out to the puppy as she bent down to get closer. "Aren't you a cutie. I bet you're going to have a nice home in no time."

For a moment she let herself picture the two of them walking in to a shelter someday and coming out with a little puppy for Quinn, taking him to Central Park and playing in the grass, and then taking him back to Quinn's apartment and showing him his little fluffy bed. Because of course Operation Move Quinn to New York would have been successful by then and she would be living just blocks away from Rachel. Or…maybe _with_ Rachel.

"Oh, hey Rach. I just remembered. How would you like to stop in an art gallery with me? I need to take some pictures for an assignment and there's a gallery I like just down the road."

"Sure! That'd be fun. What's the assignment?"

Quinn stood to face Rachel. "It's for my Art Appreciation class. We need to take five photos of art that appeals to us and describe what it is that we like about each one. Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Are you kidding? I'm loving this total immersion in culture this weekend. Cafés, bookstores, walks through a gorgeous campus, and now a visit to an art gallery? Kurt is going to be _so_ jealous."

"I'm glad," Quinn nodded. "I mean…that you love the culture," Quinn laughed. "This is quite a change from what we used to do in Ohio. So…I wasn't sure if you'd be happy."

Rachel looked tenderly into Quinn's eyes. "Right now I'm just happy to be with _you_ , Quinn. Anything else we do just plays a supportive role." She smiled and took great pride in the blush that spread across Quinn's face, and then proceeded to plant a quick kiss on her cheek. "Lead the way, O Captain, My Captain."

* * *

The gallery was tiny compared to what Rachel imagined she would find in New York, but it offered an intimacy that everything else around the campus had also exhibited. A mixture of prints and originals from local and national talent lined the pale walls, while sculptures sat on pedestals between them. Many of the works were undoubtedly showcases for students, and Rachel imagined what it would be like if Quinn were to put on a show one day. Quinn would be dressed in a stylish white top, black pencil skirt and heels, her hair pulled back, looking elegant and professional as she entertained her guests and patrons of the arts while they sipped their Chardonnay and lavished compliments over her work, whispering about the exciting future of this up-and-coming artista. Some cad would suggest that _she_ was the "real work of art on display tonight". Rachel would have to hit him.

Rachel followed Quinn around as she searched for works that appealed to her. They both agreed that the abstracts were generally not their style, but were divided when it came to their favorite subject matter in the realistic works. Rachel delighted in the scenes of night life and motion, while Quinn was attracted to the more contemplative portraits and sculptures, finding several that she took pictures of for her assignment.

"I realize it's become almost cliché, but I know some day I'm going to have to get a copy of Rodin's _The Thinker_. Maybe to go in my study, or on a living room end table."

"That's okay, Quinn. It's a classic. I don't think it will ever go out of style."

They milled around a while longer before ascending the spiral staircase to the second floor, where they found pieces that were perhaps a little more risqué to put on the first floor.

Quinn approached one such painting, an original oil on canvas that featured what Rachel would describe as a half-dressed brunette in quiet despair.

"Oh! _Mariska in Blue_. I fell in love with this one last time I was here," exclaimed Quinn.

"The painting or the girl whose blouse is falling off?" Rachel inquired with one eyebrow up as she studied the subject.

Quinn scoffed. "No, it's the raw emotion the artist has captured. Do you see how the placement of her hand here, on her chest, draws the eye to her downturned face? And look at the use of light and shadow on her face. Her cheeks have a white satiny glow of youth, while her eyes are cast in deep shadow. Even her lips somehow convey the silent but unmistakable angst she's going through. It's just so beautiful."

"Nicely critiqued," said a husky woman's voice from behind them. "Are you planning on writing for an art review magazine?"

Quinn turned around and seemed to immediately recognize the tall, slender brunette. "Oh hi again… Spencer is it?"

"Spencer, yes. And you're Quinn, if I remember?" Spencer looked up at Quinn's bandages and scrapes and winced. "Ooh, that looks like a nasty cut on your head. Are you okay?"

"I am she. Yes, I'm okay. And no, I'm just writing for an assignment for Dr. Francoeur's Art Appreciation class," laughed Quinn as she rattled off all the answers to Spencer's questions.

"Oh, Francois is amazing! I had him too." Spencer recalled fondly, placing her hand gently on top of Quinn's at the same time. "Well, he would definitely be impressed by you. You're certainly right about Suchitra Bhosle's talent at capturing the mood of her subjects. I too find the contemplative women portrayed in her modern impressionistic style breathtaking."

Spencer had yet to look over at Rachel, and she was certainly acting like her breath had been taken by Quinn, but thankfully Quinn had enough presence to turn to her and introduce her.

"Rachel…this is Spencer. She works for the gallery, I met her last time I was here. Spencer this is my…best friend, Rachel. She's up visiting this weekend from New York. She's a student of musical theater at NYADA."

Rachel smiled politely and extended her hand, trying not to react to what felt like a slight on their new relationship status when Quinn stuttered trying to explain it to the woman. She wasn't sure what to expect, but ' _Best friend? Really, Quinn?_ ' she thought. ' _I guess that's better than former classmate._ '

"How lovely. Nice to meet you, Rachel," Spencer returned with a firm handshake, and then turned back to Quinn. "Quinn, I'll be hosting a reception for my own work here next Thursday evening. Perhaps you'd like to stop by."

"Oh, congratulations. That sounds nice. I'll, um, have to see how my homework load goes," replied Quinn.

"Of course," nodded Spencer. "But if you get a chance, it would be nice to see you there." Spencer gave Quinn a wink and then excused herself to attend to other visitors.

"Well," Rachel whispered, "Kyra wasn't kidding when she said guys _and_ girls hit on you all the time!"

Quinn blushed while she got her camera phone ready to take a picture of the Bhosle painting. "Sorry, Rach. I guess she did kind of come on strong."

"She's very pretty," Rachel observed, looking back over at her talking to another couple. "Are you going to go to her reception?"

"Uh, _no_!" replied Quinn.

"Why not? It sounds like fun," Rachel goaded her with a smirk. "It appears that you both have an appreciation for _breathtaking_ , _contemplative_ women."

"Rachel! Stop!" urged Quinn as she looked around to check for listening ears.

Rachel giggled while Quinn tried to get a steady shot. After the heavy conversations they'd been having today, Rachel decided she'd let the 'best friend' tag slide for now, on account of Quinn's self-proclaimed fears around being out. She just hoped it would be something that Quinn would reconcile in her mind and start dealing with sooner rather than later, now that she had a reason to. Hopefully. Baby steps, Quinn. Baby steps.

* * *

When they returned to Quinn's room, they were surprised to see Kyra and Tim there lying on top of Kyra's bed, chatting away about some drama in Kyra's drama class on Friday.

"Hey guys!" Kyra chirped when she looked over at them coming in the door. "How was your afternoon?"

Quinn and Rachel looked at each other knowingly and smiled privately at all that had been said and done since this morning.

"Oh, it was a delightful day," replied Rachel.

"I thought you two were going to the movies," said Quinn.

"Well, my paper took a little longer than I thought after, um, Tim stopped by," blushed Kyra. "Then we got talking about last night and the party. Oh! And then I started wondering how Rachel was going to get to the train station and thought maybe we could drive you there!"

"Thanks, Kyra. That's really sweet of you," said Rachel.

"When do you have to catch the train?"

"We should probably leave in about an hour," replied Quinn, looking at the schedule she'd brought up on her phone.

"Aww, so soon? I was hoping maybe we could squeeze in a movie before you go," pouted Kyra. "I just rented _Step Up_."

"As much fun as that sounds, Quinn's right," sighed Rachel. "I have a full week starting early tomorrow morning."

"Okay, next time then."

"Hey Quinn, how's your head? I heard the goblins attacked you last night," Tim joked as he sat up from the bed.

"Ha. Ha," Quinn deadpanned as she put her phone away. Rachel and Quinn both sat down on Quinn's bed. "I'm fine, it just throbs a bit." Rachel looked over and gave her a sad face as she examined her bruises and bandages.

"I also heard there may be some _looove_ in the airrrr," Tim emphasized as he waggled his eyebrows at them.

"Tim!" Kyra scolded as she slapped him on the shoulder. "Be cool. They're just starting out."

Quinn and Rachel chuckled as Quinn looked over and kissed Rachel on the cheek.

"It's true though," said Quinn, looking back at Tim. "We finally got wise to each other's feelings. We're sweeties now."

' _Sweeties,_ ' thought Rachel. ' _Well, that's certainly better than best friends! I definitely like that._ '

Kyra bounced up and down on her bed at the cuteness. "Awww! You guys are so adorable! I told you, Rachel! I ship you two."

"It's weird though. I never would've pegged you guys for being gay together," continued Tim.

"What do you mean, Tim?" asked Quinn.

"Well, I knew several lesbians back in high school and one of them was always, like, you know…butch. But you guys are both beautiful, and have long hair, and–"

"Ooookay, Tim," interrupted Kyra while Quinn rolled her eyes. "I'm going to stop you right there, baby. I think you've said enough."

"No, but seriously. I mean usually one girl is, you know, like the man–"

"Tim!" admonished Kyra. "Shut! Up!"

"Tim, that may be a very stereotypical outlook on gay women," Rachel inserted politely, "but like most stereotypes, I think you'll find that viewpoint to be oversimplified and inaccurate."

"Case in point," replied Tim.

"Exactly," replied Kyra, still glaring at her boyfriend while she shoved him back down on the bed.

"And on that note, I think I will start packing my bag so we can be ready to go," said Rachel as she stood from the bed.

"Do you need some help, Rach?" asked Quinn.

"No sweetie, you rest for a few minutes."

"Oh! Quinn, can I borrow one of your Yale sweatshirts to take back with me to New York?" Rachel pleaded.

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "Borrow? You mean you're going to return it?"

"No," said Rachel innocently.

Quinn scoffed at that. "Yeah, okay. Fine."

"Yay!" Rachel clapped excitedly.

Quinn shook her head at the cuteness standing in front of her, getting her way already.

"Oh. Where are they?"

"Check under the plaid flannel shirts in the middle drawer," replied Quinn.

"Oh hey," said Tim, poking his head up again from underneath Kyra. "That's another thing…"

"NO!" the three women shouted in unison.

* * *

Rachel's packing took longer than it should have on account of Quinn distracting her by throwing pillows at her butt every time she turned around and whistling at her whenever she bent over, but before long the brunette had gathered her scattered belongings and her makeup and toiletries and stuffed them all (carefully) into her overnight bag.

Setting the bag next to the door and dropping her killer black boots next to it, she let out a satisfied sigh.

"There!" she said. "All set," she added as she turned towards Quinn with an innocent smile and tilt of her head.

"Good," said Quinn, staring at her mischievously.

"Good," Rachel echoed, and then narrowed her eyes while pursing her lips. "Now, you die!"

Quinn screeched and her eyes bugged out as Rachel jumped on Quinn's bed and tackled her to the mattress, doing her best to get underneath Quinn's arms and tickle her again, having enjoyed the results from when she did it earlier in the day. Quinn seemed a little more prepared this time, however, and soon it was Rachel who was underneath Quinn's curtain of blonde hair, begging for mercy.

"Fool me once, Rachel Berry, shame on you."

"Ahh! No, Quinn! Uncle! Mercy!" Rachel tried every standard safe word she knew.

"Try it twice, little girl, the fool is you," said Quinn as she pinned Rachel on her side, holding her arms and legs in place. Quinn lifted Rachel's shirt halfway, pressed her lips down on her bare midsection, and blew as hard as she could while Rachel screamed.

"Quinn!" Rachel shouted in between gasps of air as she was tickle-tortured by the strong blonde holding her down. "Quinn!" she laughed in hysterics as Quinn repeated her blowing a few more times. "Okay. Stop. Stop. Please. No more," she giggled.

"Have we learned our lesson, sweetie?" Quinn smiled with great satisfaction, but ready to continue should Rachel answer unwisely.

"Yes! Yes!" Rachel giggled out more.

"Who's on top?"

"You are, baby," Rachel replied. "For as long as I want you to be," she added impishly a few beats later.

Quinn shot her a mock glare, but then pulled her into a hug as she collapsed next to her on the bed. "You're lucky I like you," she warned teasingly, and then smiled as she pressed her lips to Rachel's.

The two of them kissed and snuggled for the remainder of the hour. As the time approached for the four of them to leave for the station, Rachel sighed internally in relief as she thought she was free from the awkwardness of saying goodbye to Hayley, but her luck did not hold. With only a few minutes left, the bubbly brunette walked in the door and announced herself.

"Hey, bitches! What's up?!"

"Hey, Hayley," answered Kyra. "We're just about to take Rachel to the train station."

"Aww. That's sad," replied Hayley. "Sorry you have to go so soon, Rachel."

"Me too," said Rachel.

"So whatcha all going to do later tonight?" continued Hayley. "I'm so done with studying for chem. I need to chill."

"Well," replied Kyra, "we were thinking of watching _Step Up_."

"Yes! Count me in. I'll just wait for you here, K?"

"Okay!" said Kyra.

Rachel looked around the room and created a mental picture of how that would probably unfold. Four of them. TV in the middle. No couch. Kyra and Tim would be on one bed. Quinn and Hayley would be…

' _Fuck._ _Oh God,_ ' she thought. ' _Rachel, don't go there,'_ she told herself. ' _Quinn's a big girl. She can thwart any advances Hayley might make when I'm gone. For the love of Barbra, rein in the jealousy._ '

This was definitely going to be one of the hard parts about their long distance relationship – worrying about Hayley. ' _Quinn is taken! Couldn't she just move on, for heaven's sake?_ ' she asked herself. ' _I mean, she'll have to eventually, right?_ '

The four of them scooted off the beds and Rachel slipped on her boots while Quinn grabbed her bag.

"Okay, well, goodbye Rachel. It was nice to see you again. Good luck back in New York," said Hayley in a saccharine tone, waving as she smiled.

Quinn glared briefly at Hayley and then moved towards the door.

"Thank you, Hayley. I wish you the same with your acting classes," replied Rachel.

Quinn snorted and opened the door, letting Tim and Kyra by.

Rachel then followed and the four of them were off down the hall to Kyra's car.

"Oh crap!" exclaimed Rachel when they'd reached the first floor of the dorm. After all that I forgot the sweatshirt.

"I can get it," replied Quinn.

"No, you don't know which one I want. Give me your room key and I'll run up and get it."

"Uh, okay. Let me go with you."

"No, I know where it is," Rachel countered as she grabbed Quinn's keys out of her hand and headed to the stairwell. "Be right back," she called out behind her.

It was true, in all the pillow throwing and other distractions, Rachel forgot to pack the sweatshirt she'd laid out. But there was one more thing she felt she needed to take care of, too.

Rachel slipped the key in the door and opened it to find Hayley sitting on Quinn's bed, reading a book.

"Hey, back so soon?"

"Forgot Quinn's sweatshirt that I wanted to steal," replied Rachel as she walked over to Quinn's dresser and picked up the neatly folded bundle. She walked back to the open door and paused for a moment as she held the doorknob in her hand, unsure if she was going to do this.

Hell _yes_ she was!

"Hey, Hayley," she said as she turned to face the other woman and closed the door behind her. "Um, I…just wanted to say thanks for convincing Quinn to talk to me this weekend," Rachel glanced down at her feet for a moment to gather the strength to say what needed to be said. "As you can see, it worked out pretty well in the end."

Hayley looked up from the book she was reading and gave Rachel a puzzled look. "So, you and Quinn…talked...about that weekend after you left?"

"Yes. She told me she came out to you. A-And that you were there for her, to listen to her. I think she really benefited from having a good listener…you know, with your insight and experience on the subject," continued Rachel.

Hayley snorted. "Yeah, I think she did."

"Anyway, that was very nice of you. But…I just wanted you to know, _I can take it from here_ ," Rachel emphasized, hoping her meaning was clear.

"Excuse me?" asked Hayley, raising both eyebrows.

Rachel sighed, keeping her eyes locked on Hayley's. "Okay. Let me put this in words I think you'll understand." Rachel took a deep breath. "From now on…I'd like you to keep your hands off Quinn. I know you like her, and I think she may have had feelings for you too, at one point, but...she and I are together now."

Hayley scoffed. "Uh, I think Quinn's a big girl and she can tell me when she feels uncomfortable," Hayley sneered.

" _I'm_ telling you I'm uncomfortable, Hayley. _You_ have boundary issues."

"So…what? You're girlfriends now? Quinn agreed to being exclusive with you?" Hayley inquired.

"Well, not in those exact words, but exclusivity was implied!" retorted Rachel, indignant at Hayley's challenge, and at what _she_ was implying.

"You're going to do the whole long distance relationship thing with her? Put the poor girl in a cage?"

"She's not a fucking _pet_ , Hayley! She can think for herself and choose to do whatever she wants!"

Hayley glared at Rachel and looked back down at her open book. "Damn right she can."

Rachel huffed and threw up her arms in frustration as she turned her back on Hayley and opened the door. "Goodbye, Hayley," she shot back, though not sure why she felt the need to say anything more, and slammed the door behind her. "Bitch," she whispered under her breath as she walked back down the hall, unsure if she did the right thing or just made things worse.

* * *

 **A/N:** I love reviews. Please and thank you, thank you, thank you!


	12. Too Soon For Goodbye

**Chapter 12 – Too Soon For Goodbye**

* * *

"If you're that worried about her, Quinn, why don't you go up and check on her yourself?" Kyra asked, chuckling while she watched Quinn pace back and forth in the dorm lobby.

Quinn paused for a moment to consider the suggestion, worrying her lip before shaking her head gently. "No, I know the look Rachel gave me. It was definitely a 'stay here, I need to go do something' look."

Quinn looked at the stairwell door for the millionth time and then plopped down in one of the antique, cushioned chairs along the wall with a heavy sigh, crossing her arms, and then lifting one up to hold her forehead.

She knew exactly what Rachel would do – she was going to confront Hayley on her own terms and give her the 'back off' speech. Rachel was good at speeches, sometimes a little too good, and this one worried her. What would Hayley counter with when cornered by an angry diva? Would Hayley use her knowledge as a weapon to hurt Rachel, to knock her off her soapbox up there? And if so, how long would it take their relationship to recover from the backlash? Everything had turned around completely from two weeks ago. God, this secret of what happened that _one night_ , when she was alone and feeling lost, was going to be the death of her…

" _Hey. Thanks for coming over," Quinn greeted Hayley at the door to her room, frowning from her present forlorn state._

" _Sure, Quinn. You sounded pretty down on the phone. Are you okay?"_

 _Quinn shrugged and motioned for Hayley to come inside, closing the door behind her. "Rachel went back to New York."_

" _Well, I didn't think you invited me over for a threesome," replied Hayley with a waggle of her eyebrows._

 _Quinn rolled her eyes and chuckled lightly at Hayley's ever-present sexual banter._

" _But I did bring something to cheer you up!" Hayley continued as she presented a six-pack of wine coolers from behind her back._

" _Jesus, Hayley! You just walked across campus with bottles of alcohol?"_

" _Pssh, as if! I dumped the grocery bag in the trashcan downstairs."_

" _How did you…"_

" _Quinn…please tell me you have a fake ID," scoffed Hayley._

" _Maybe," said Quinn, unconvincingly._

" _Oh my god! We are getting you one this week, girl! And then we are going out danc-iiing!"_

 _Hayley began rapping a popular new song as she club-danced around Quinn, while the blonde just smiled hesitantly and shook her head._

" _I checked in at the hotel_

 _Left the hotel and hit the club_

 _Then the club got shut down, what you do?_

 _I turn the hotel into the club" *****_

 _Quinn finally let out a small laugh at Hayley's antics. "You're unbelievable."_

 _Hayley laughed out loud in return and pulled Quinn into a hug._

" _Now come on, what's gotten you in the dumps? I'm sure Rachel will come back and visit again."_

" _I miss her."_

" _She just left!" Hayley laughed again._

 _Quinn looked away in silence as her eyes began to well up._

" _Oh, sweetie. Okay…" Hayley replied encouragingly._

" _Give me one of those…" Quinn said as she grabbed one of the bottles and headed over to her bed._

 _For the next couple hours, Quinn sat on her bed across from Hayley, alternating between clutching her pillow and drinking one wine cooler after another as she poured her heart out. She felt both scared and relief over telling someone for the first time that not only was she quite certain she was gay, but had been harboring a giant crush on one Rachel Berry for the last four years. She might have told Mercedes or Santana, had they been there, but they were not, and she was not about to open up about something like this over the phone. She needed to look someone in the eyes as she described what could no longer be contained within. She wanted comfort and visible confirmation that what she was telling them was okay, and that she was not some kind of pervert, some kind of deviant human being for having such thoughts. Being with Rachel this weekend, and free from the tyranny of Ohio, just made her realize that it was no longer an option to remain silent and do nothing. Kyra was becoming a good friend and seemed like she would offer the understanding she would need, but Kyra was out with Tim again, and… well, here was Hayley, who was not only a good friend, but openly gay, too._

 _So Quinn opened up and let everything out. It was glorious. And she felt like she'd been set free._

 _Quinn told Hayley all about Rachel and the years of adoration, from the moment Quinn laid eyes on her in 9_ _th_ _grade. She told her about her aggressive denial that led to her bullying the poor girl, and the slushies she began ordering as she rose to the top of the Cheerio pyramid. She spilled the truth about having a baby and cried over the painful decision to give Beth away, and then how supportive Rachel had been to her. She recounted her skank phase and Rachel's determination to pull her out of it, and how they slowly became friends after that. Then she lamented about the on-again, off-again relationship Rachel has had with Finn, and how, sadly, she'd not heard one word from Rachel regarding any interest in women. The summer and this past weekend had all been really nice, and she loved how close they'd become over the last few months, but she knew it was wishful thinking to pretend that Rachel could ever show interest in her as anything more than friends, and that made it doubly painful every time she was near her._

 _When Quinn needed a break from the emotional recounting of her own life, she asked Hayley to tell her more about hers. So Hayley told Quinn all about her first girlfriend, and the experience of coming out to her family in sophomore year of high school. Her parents had been supportive, but her older brothers and their friends became quite verbally abusive. It ended up being too much for her girlfriend and they broke up at the beginning of senior year. From that point on, it had been a series of short-lived relationships and one-night stands. She'd met a girl over the summer at a coffee shop, and it was going really well, but the girl ended it before going off to college. She'd realized she didn't want to be caged up, she'd told Hayley._

 _It was at this point that the wine coolers were gone and Quinn decided to lighten the mood and break open a bottle of Chardonnay. She was hungry for cheese and crackers, she said, and so naturally they needed some wine to go with that._

 _They made a plate of appetizers and giggled as they exchanged stories about the guys that had been hitting on them over the past few weeks. Quite tipsy by now, they wandered back to Quinn's bed and flopped down at right angles to each other, each bending their knees and leaning back against a wall to help prop themselves up. Quinn slid off her flats, exposing her bare feet, and Hayley's eyes lit up._

" _Do you know what I've always loved about you, Quinn?" Hayley swayed as she leaned sideways towards Quinn._

" _What's that?"_

" _Your feet."_

" _My feet…"_

" _They're SO cute."_

" _Hayley Miller! Do you have a foot fetish?"_

" _I think-" (hiccup!) "I think I do," Hayley winked. "Can I paint them?"_

" _My feet?"_

" _Your toenails!"_

" _Oh…I don't think that'd be a good idea right now," Quinn chuckled, imagining how they'd turn out given their current state of intoxication. "But here, you can massage them," she said as she straightened her legs and offered her feet to Hayley, wiggling her toes._

" _My pleasure," Hayley smiled, setting down her plate of cheese and pulling Quinn's legs onto her lap. Quinn moaned in delight as Hayley started massaging under her toes and worked her way down to her heels, and then up her calves._

" _You know, a girl could get used to this kind of attention," Quinn said from her current state of pleasure, fluttering her eyelids. Her head lolled over in Hayley's direction and she caught Hayley's eyes staring back at her._

 _Hayley held Quinn's gaze for a moment and then glanced down at Quinn's lips. "Have you ever kissed a girl, Quinn?"_

" _Yes."_

" _Not counting your family."_

" _Then no."_

 _Quinn's heart began racing as she realized the experience Hayley was about to offer. There was no denying, she'd been attracted to Hayley from the moment they met, instantly feeling a chemistry between them. And when Hayley had started flirting with her more and more over the past few weeks, it was quite a rush to be courted by a woman, even if she'd felt the need at the time to maintain the façade of being uninterested._

" _Let me show you what you've been missing."_

" _Okay."_

The door to the stairwell flung open and startled Quinn out of her seat. Out walked a tiny brunette with her show smile on, holding up Quinn's borrowed (stolen) Yale sweatshirt, as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened.

"Ready!" announced Rachel, walking over to where Quinn was standing in front of the chair. "Are you okay, Quinn? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Quinn shook the feeling of being caught in a tryst and began studying Rachel's face to gauge the nature of the conversation she was about to have with her – inquisitive or defensive. Nervously she asked the unavoidable. "What happened up there, Rach?"

"Oh, well I picked up the sweatshirt and was about to leave, but then…I decided to have a little tête-à-tête with Hayley," Rachel replied matter-of-factly.

"Please tell me that's not a euphemism for you headbutting her," Quinn pleaded with a grimace.

"Oh! Don't be silly. Emotions may have run a little high, but we at least came to a mutual…if not amicable…understanding," Rachel nodded.

Quinn looked Rachel up and down and noticed her hands were shaking slightly.

"Oh God, I'm going to find a dead body in my room, aren't I…"

Rachel scoffed. "Quinn! No!"

There was silence as Quinn and Rachel looked into each other's eyes.

Kyra used the moment to pull Tim outside. "We'll go pull the car around. Meet you guys out by the turnaround, K?"

"Okay," replied Quinn, looking over at Kyra and then back to Rachel.

Quinn held out her hands for Rachel, and Rachel moved closer and took ahold of them.

"Rach, are you sure everything's okay? You know I was going to talk to Hayley tonight about us. I'm sorry if you felt you needed to speak to her yourself."

"No, it's okay Quinn. Really. It was just something I needed to do for myself. It felt good to get it off my chest."

"Okay," frowned Quinn.

"You do still need to talk to her about us, though, Quinn. She's going to need to hear it all from you, too."

"I know."

"Hayley is waiting for _you_ to tell her that her advances are unwanted. She won't believe it coming from me. In fact, she says I'm being cruel and treating you like a caged animal by starting a long distance relationship with you. So I know she thinks this whole thing we've started is stupid, especially when she's right there in front of you, dying to start something with you."

Quinn swallowed thickly. "I know, Rach."

"I just don't think she's going to give up on you until you say something to her, and I don't think telling her that I'm your 'best friend' is going to cut it, Quinn…"

Quinn winced at the reference to her introduction of Rachel to Spencer. "Look, about that…I'm sorry how that came out earlier. You have to understand, an art gallery is kind of an intimidating place for me to come out right now. It reminds me of-"

"I know, Quinn," Rachel interrupted. "You don't have to explain it to me right now. There are some things that will take time. I'd just like to know that, eventually, you will. I don't want to be your secret forever."

"Rach, I won't do that to you…"

Rachel smiled. "I know, Quinn. Baby steps." Rachel clasped Quinn's right hand in her left and steered them towards the door, her smile growing decidedly wicked. "We can start by eliminating one corner of the love triangle who's currently lying on your bed."

Quinn shot her a look with a raised eyebrow and then looked down at their now entwined hands.

"Is that blood under your fingernails?"

"It most certainly is not, Quinn," replied Rachel, looking straight ahead with a smirk on her face.

* * *

Quinn led Rachel over to the car door, nodding attentively and smiling as Rachel described in detail several recent experiences with the declining cleanliness of the New York subway system. In high school, her rambling and her unabashed self-confidence was what drove people away. But to Quinn, it meant the person she wanted to be with most was near. It reminded her of how close she yearned to be to Rachel - how she wished every weekend could include long conversations with this warm, sweet, bubbly person beside her.

"…then the doors open and the smell of cheap alcohol and urine hits you _full force_ , Quinn - no matter _what_ time of day. It's inexcusable for a beautiful city like New York!"

Okay, maybe _other_ types of long conversations…

Quinn broke from their handhold – which had been so nice, she realized – and took Rachel's overnight bag from her while her diatribe wound down.

"Oh, thank you," Rachel replied in response when she noticed what Quinn was doing.

Quinn smiled in admiration and opened the car door for Rachel.

"Aww! I feel like a chauffeured star tonight."

"Yes, Rachel. Only the finest Honda Civic for your travels," Quinn monotoned with a smirk.

"Hey!" Tim popped up as he was about to climb in the driver's seat. "That back seat is just as comfortable for making out as any fancy limo."

Quinn shot him a look of disgust as she took Rachel's bag and placed it in the open trunk. "First, ew! Second, is that what you told your prom date, Tim?"

Tim had no response and just mumbled something about Yale women as he got in the car, while Kyra laughed into one hand. "Oh! _Burrrn_!"

Moments later they were buckled up and on their way. It was going to be a short ride tonight. Rachel leaned into Quinn's shoulder and they both sighed.

"Hey you two…hands where I can see them," Tim commanded in mock authority.

Rachel giggled while Quinn pursed her lips and stared at him through his reflection in the rear view mirror. A pair of middle fingers slowly rose into his view.

"Okay that's not what I meant young lady. When we get home you are _grounded_!"

Rachel pulled Quinn's arms down while the blonde stuck out her tongue at Tim, and then used her hand on Quinn's cheek to turn Quinn's head towards her.

"Kiss me," she commanded in Quinn's ear.

Quinn gladly complied.

* * *

Too soon, they arrived at the train station. The contrast in mood between last night and tonight was not lost on any of the women. The feeling of having little time was the common element tying the experiences together. Quinn hated that their time this weekend was coming to an end, but _oh_ , what a lovely end it was.

Kyra pulled Rachel into a hug while Tim popped the trunk and Quinn retrieved Rachel's overnight bag.

"Rachel," Kyra held her name in the air while hugging her tightly. "I'm going to miss you!"

"I'll miss you too, Kyra," Rachel smiled into the equally short girl's hair.

"Come back soon, promise?" Kyra begged as she let go of Rachel.

"I will. But please come down to New York for a visit with Quinn sometime, okay? We'd love to have you."

"Oh, you can count on it. I've never been to New York. You _must_ show me around!"

Rachel gasped. "Never been?! Oh, we have to fix that! Would you like to attend a musical? I can give you the insider's tour of Broadway!"

"Okay. Before you start planning each hour of the tour, Miss Broadway, let's get you to your train," chuckled Quinn. "I don't want to be the target of Ms. July's wrath if you show up late."

"Okay. Fine, fine. But don't forget, Kyra! Just let me know a weekend that's good for you. Okay?"

"Okay," laughed Kyra.

"What about when it's good for me?" asked Quinn, pretending to feel left out.

"Oh, you'll come when I call you," joked Rachel.

"Oh! You think?!" Quinn challenged, hands on her hips.

"Bye, Tim!" Rachel waved.

"Bye, Rachel. Watch out for flying margaritas now!" Tim replied.

"Tim!" scolded Kyra, faking exasperation. "Get in the car! No sex for you!"

Quinn grimaced and looked over at a smirking Rachel.

"Take your time, Quinn," Kyra told Quinn as she got back in the passenger seat of her car. "We'll be right here."

"Thanks you guys," Quinn and Rachel said in unison.

They waved goodbye and headed towards the station entrance. Quinn looked over at Rachel and held out her hand while grasping Rachel's roller bag in the other. "Okay, little bear. Let's get you to your train."

* * *

Boarding pass in hand, Quinn parked Rachel's roller bag near a bench as they stood and waited for the train.

"Hey Rach, I wanted to tell you. I'm sorry for being so emo this weekend. And I'm not talking just about last night. The whole freak out at the park and my coming out tears. I'll try to keep it together next time. K?"

"No, baby. It's okay. I feel like I'm getting to know more sides of you. I want you to be open and honest with me, always. Trust me, I can take everything you've got."

Quinn chuckled and looked down at the ground. "I'm not so sure about that."

"Do you _remember_ high school? Try me."

"What? Right now?" Quinn looked up into Rachel's eyes.

"No, silly. When you come visit me in New York in two weeks."

Quinn guffawed. "Uh, did I miss the planning memo on that?"

"No," Rachel giggled. "I'm just your official trip planner now. Didn't you know? It comes with the package."

"Mmm. I see. Good thing I like this little package," Quinn snickered as she reached around to Rachel's ass and pulled her closer.

Rachel smacked her on the arm. "You're incorrigible."

"You love it," countered Quinn.

"I love you," Rachel corrected, giving Quinn a chaste peck on the lips.

"I love you more," Quinn replied against Rachel's lips as she wrapped her arms around the brunette and held her closely.

Rachel reached up and crossed her arms around Quinn's neck, moaning into the wet kiss.

They took turns nibbling at each other's bottom lip, exploring different positions to fit their lips together as Quinn held on tight. This, she thought, she could do forever as she pushed harder into the deepening kiss. She couldn't imagine ever getting tired of the feeling of Rachel's soft, full lips pressed against hers.

Just as Rachel's mouth opened up to her, the sound of the approaching train hit their ears. Dammit! That was not nearly enough kissing! She was going to have to let go of Rachel too soon. She twirled her tongue around Rachel's, desperate for more, as a tear fell from her eyes.

"I love you, Rach. I don't want you to go."

"I love you too, baby. All I want to do is stay like this with you."

Quinn kissed her once more.

"Rach?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

Rachel's lips pursed and spread wide across her face as her eyes lit up, immediately letting go of the tears she'd been holding back.

"Yes, Quinn. Yes! Of course I will!" Rachel threw herself into one more quick hug as the train opened its doors.

"Goodbye, Rach."

"Bye, baby. I love you! I'll see you soon," said Rachel as she slowly let go of Quinn's hand and walked through the doorway into the train.

"I love you too. I'll call you," Quinn replied as the doors closed and the train pulled away.

* * *

 _*_ **Song credit** : _After Party_ , Dorrough Music

 **A/N:** Doing my best to keep to a regular posting schedule. Bear with me! :-)

And now, for some replies to reviewers:

TW: I'm toying with that very idea!

RachelBarbraBerry: damn right she does! I think you made that quite clear to Quinn in this chapter. Well done! ;-)

FaberryBRA: ;)

To the reviewer who doesn't see this relationship going well: Aww! Have faith! This is an unusual way for them to start a relationship. They're starting to learn though, don't you think? Yeah, I know... Quinn has a lot to learn about trusting people, especially those she loves, with the truth. She tends to immediately protect herself. Hmm, when have we seen this before from Quinn...? ;-) In my fic, look at this as Quinn's opportunity for character growth! :-)

To all the reviewers who have expressed their hate for Hayley: sorry? :-) she's a necessary supporting character in this fic. I happen to feel sorry for her. Maybe you do too after this chapter?

And for the guest reviewer (and many other readers, I presume) having a hard time understanding why Quinn referred to Rachel as her 'best friend' to Spencer, I realize this may have been puzzling. Believe me, it was difficult to write Quinn saying that. Hopefully this chapter helps explain a little more about why she said it like that, though. If it still doesn't sit right with you, understand that I mean to portray Quinn as a very complex individual. There is so much going on beneath the surface. You will definitely see more of that come out in later chapters.

But if you would like to know more about my reasoning behind this or anything else in this fic, I'd love to hear from you. Ask away in a PM or on tumblr (daemonrider).


	13. An End is Just a New Beginning

**A/N, Part One:**

 **Well! This one sure took me a while before I was happy with it. Sorry for the extra long wait. If this were a TV show, I think I would start episode 3 either at the beginning or the end of this chapter.**

 **Thank you to everyone who's reviewed. I enjoy reading the comments. Some of them have prompted me to add extra description or dialogue into my writing, particularly around the whole ordeal between Quinn and Hayley.** **I love it when readers can have a positive impact like that. I'll add some more comments at the end of this chapter. But for now...let's get on with it!  
**

* * *

 **Chapter 13 – An End is Just a New Beginning**

* * *

When the train was no longer in sight, Quinn sighed and finally let out the breath she realized she'd been holding, blowing through the balled up fingers that were pressed up against her mouth. She was _definitely_ going to clear her schedule for a trip to New York two weekends from now.

She let her hands fall by her side and slowly turned around to head back towards Kyra and Tim. This was going to be a _long_ two weeks.

' _Time to revive that Skype account,_ ' she told herself, and a smile crept over her face. She pulled out her phone and texted Rachel while making her way to the car.

Quinn: " _do you have Skype?_ "

Rachel: " _Yes. Miss me already?_ "

Quinn: " _yes_ "

Quinn: " _thought it might help me thru the next 2 wks_ "

Rachel: " _I think you meant 'through' the next 2 'weeks', Quinn._ "

Quinn: " _smh_ -_-"

Rachel: " _j/k baby :x I'm slowly giving in to modern texting standards._ "

Quinn rolled her eyes at her ridiculous girlfriend…then let out a little shudder of excitement at the thought of now _having_ a girlfriend.

Rachel: " _Wait, did you say 2 weeks?! What do you mean by that?_ "

Quinn: " _did you not just order me to be in NY in 2 weeks Ms Berry?_ "

Rachel: " _I didn't think you would take me seriously! OMG Quinn would you really come visit me then?_ "

Quinn: " _yes_ "

Rachel: " _Oops, I think I just startled half the train. Oh Quinn that's wonderful! I can't wait to tell Kurt we're going to have visitors!_ "

Quinn: " _ONE visitor, Kyra can come with me some other time_ "

Rachel: " _Eeeeee I'm so excited!_ "

Quinn smiled as she reached her waiting ride.

Quinn: " _g2g call me when you get home, k?_ "

Rachel: " _g2g?_ "

Quinn: " _GOT TO GO smh_ "

Rachel: " _OH! Okay! What if it's late?_ "

Quinn: " _I don't care_ "

Rachel: " _Okay!_ "

Quinn: " _love you little bear_ "

Rachel: " _Love you more ;-)_ "

Quinn put away her phone and opened the car door, sliding into the seat where Rachel was sitting a few minutes ago and letting out a big sigh.

"What?" Quinn asked moments later, blushing when she realized Kyra and Tim were both staring at her with grins on their faces.

"Did you just _skip_ out the door a moment ago when you left the station?" asked Tim, laughing.

"You are _so_ cute right now. I need to capture this moment," added Kyra, pulling out her phone.

Kyra took the picture as Quinn's cheeks flushed redder and redder.

"I just put my girlfriend on the train," Quinn announced, unable to keep her happiness to herself.

"Look at you. You're a smitten little kitten," replied Kyra. "Just like Rachel."

"I have a girlfriend," repeated Quinn, not able to get enough of how incredible that sounded next to the mental image of kissing Rachel, still fresh in her mind.

"You guys _are_ really cute together," agreed Tim. "I guess you could say Rachel really is 'gay for Fabray' now," he quipped as he started the car.

Quinn rolled her eyes and turned to look out the window as she continued to smile profusely.

Kyra groaned and smacked Tim on the arm. "Keep your bad rhymes to yourself and take us home, Tim."

"Yes, ma'am!"

* * *

Tim parked the car in the lot and the three of them started walking back along the well-lit path to Kyra and Quinn's room.

"So Quinn, did you find out from Rachel what happened upstairs?" asked Kyra.

"Yeah, did they start bare-knuckle fighting over you? Ooh! Was broken glass involved?" Tim added, sounding rather excited.

Quinn ignored the four-year-old Neanderthal walking next to them. "From what I gather, Rachel gave Hayley the 'back off' speech, and I guess she wasn't all that receptive to it."

"Did she tell her to talk to the hand, she wanted to hear it from you instead?" questioned Kyra.

"Pretty much. Said I shouldn't be put in a cage," replied Quinn.

"Jesus, girls are always speaking in code. What _happened_?" begged Tim.

Quinn and Kyra looked at each other and chuckled at Tim's bewilderment. "More than a few words can describe, Tim," said Quinn.

Quinn continued with Kyra, "I need to talk to Hayley."

"Yeah, you do," Kyra knowingly agreed.

"Why? About what?" asked Tim, still confused.

"I'll explain later, sweetie," said Kyra.

* * *

Kyra slid the key into the door and opened it to a darkened room, lit only by the glow of the television. Hayley was asleep on Quinn's bed, curled up and clutching Quinn's pillow with the comforter pulled part way across her lower half.

"Hey sleepy head," said Kyra, poking at Hayley. "We're back. You still up for the movie?"

Hayley lifted her head and opened one eye, looking at each of them. "Yeah, sure," she said quietly, rolling over and sitting up on the bed.

Quinn frowned as she watched Hayley from the door, thinking about what she needed to say to Hayley and wondering how this was all going to play out tonight. Kyra and Tim turned on a few small lights and began taking off their shoes.

Quinn walked over and sat down on the bed next to Hayley. "Hey," she offered. "You want to go talk?"

"No," Hayley replied simply, getting up and walking over to the mini-fridge and grabbing a bottle of water for herself.

Quinn studied her demeanor and decided to let it be for now. Maybe a movie could help ease things back to a sense of normality. She looked over at where Hayley had been lying and noticed a damp spot where her head had been. ' _Or maybe it will take a little more than that_ ,' she thought.

"Hey, grab me one too?" asked Quinn as she kicked off her flats and sat back on her bed. While Hayley grabbed another bottle, she turned and flipped the damp pillow over while fluffing all of the other pillows and propped them all up against the wall, hoping to save the brunette from potential embarrassment.

Quinn gave Hayley a friendly smile when she was handed the bottle of water, expecting Hayley to sit down on the bed too (while keeping a friendly distance, of course). Instead, Hayley pulled out Quinn's tilt-back leather chair from her desk and swiveled it around to face the TV. Quinn's eyebrows raised but she said nothing as Hayley tucked her feet under her lap and leaned back, looking straight ahead in silence.

While Tim was busy at the microwave watching the popcorn, Kyra grabbed the DVD from her desk and walked over to place it in the player, glancing discreetly over at Quinn and wincing slightly in silent communication. Things were most definitely not the same.

Quinn and Kyra tried to keep the conversation light and spirited to go with the movie, but the elephant in the room would not go away. Hayley was uncharacteristically quiet and, halfway through the movie, she shifted her feet out from underneath her and started putting on her shoes.

"You're leaving?" asked Kyra while Quinn looked over.

"I'm tired. I'm going back to my room," replied Hayley.

"Okay. See you tomorrow in the studio, Hayles?" Kyra offered, sweetly, to her friend.

Hayley nodded and said good night to everyone as she opened the door.

Quinn scooted to the edge of her bed. "I'll walk with you."

"No, that's okay. Watch the rest of the movie, Quinn," urged Hayley. "I'll see you tomorrow in Chem."

"I'm just not in to the movie tonight. I could use some fresh air."

Quinn turned to Kyra. "Back in a bit."

"Okay. Be careful walking back," instructed Kyra. "Got your key chain?"

"Yes, mom," replied Quinn.

* * *

The pair walked down the hall and out the lobby doors in silence. This was the perfect time to clear the air, Quinn thought, but she didn't know how to start.

Might as well be direct.

"I heard you and Rachel talked," tried Quinn.

Hayley scoffed. "Is that what she called it…"

"Well, she used a fancier term, but yeah. She said you told her she was being cruel, locking me up in a cage-"

"Because I want you to be free?"

"And that our whole long distance relationship is a stupid idea," Quinn continued.

Hayley grabbed Quinn by the arm and stopped her, facing her to look into her eyes.

"Because it IS, Quinn! You know what happened between me and my last girlfriend!"

"And you know what Rachel means to me."

Hayley sighed and let go of Quinn's arm. "But why now? Why start something when you're a hundred miles away? What if we're equally compatible? Quinn…I'm _right here_ , and I'm crazy about you."

Quinn sighed and tried to think of how else to explain what she felt for Rachel. What else could she say that she hadn't already said that night, two weeks ago?

"I'm sorry, Hayley. My heart belongs to Rachel. I _love_ her."

Hayley broke eye contact and clamped her eyes shut as she turned her head away.

"You have to accept that," pleaded Quinn.

Hayley looked back into Quinn's eyes with a watery gaze. Quinn could tell she was trying to hold it together, and she wished she could make it all better.

" _Why_ did you invite me over that night?"

"That's…complicated, you-"

"Did you _ever_ feel anything for me, Quinn? Or was I just some lesbian litmus test for you?"

"Hayley! It wasn't like that. _Yes_ , I felt something for you...from the moment we met, actually. I just wasn't ready to tell you."

"I thought you were finally opening up to me and letting me in."

"That was a difficult day. I was in a downward spiral when Rachel left and I needed someone to talk to, badly. Someone who I could confide in. And you were there for me. You let me go on for hours about her. It felt really good, actually…to finally tell someone what was going on inside. I felt…I don't know… it was like I was free for the first time. You know?"

Quinn searched Hayley's eyes for understanding and Hayley nodded.

"Once the truth was finally out…I guess there was this moment where I just…came to peace with the idea that I would probably never have Rachel the way I wanted her. I was ready to move on."

"Yeah…that was the impression I got," Hayley chuckled. "That was really nice. But…then the next morning, not so much…"

"I realized I _wasn't_ so ready. I panicked. I've been doing a lot of that lately," sighed Quinn.

"In all honesty Quinn, I may have had an ulterior motive when I said you should just tell Rachel everything. I knew that morning that there could never be an 'us' when you were still hoping for her."

Quinn chuckled, "Yeah, Rachel kinda figured that out for me."

"Smart girl."

"The funny thing is, after all that, she's the one who admitted her feelings first."

Hayley sighed, turning to face the path to her dorm again and began walking.

"And now… you two are all cute and couple-y."

"Yeah," said Quinn as she walked beside Hayley, smiling as she thought about just how much she loved being all 'cute and couple-y' with Rachel today.

"I guess your dream came true, Quinn."

Quinn nodded and smiled even broader.

"Sucks for me, but…I know I should be happy for you."

"I'm sorry I led you on before I was really ready. I...umm…you'll learn I don't always make the best decisions under the influence of alcohol."

"Yeah," Hayley laughed, "Does anyone really?"

Quinn shuddered and blocked out some memories she'd rather forget.

"Will you play nice with Rachel?"

"Do I have to?" asked Hayley jokingly.

A smirk crept up one corner of Quinn's lips. "I know she can get on people's nerves, but I need you to tame your inner bitch when she's around. She's my girlfriend now."

Hayley scoffed. " _I'll_ rein it in if _she_ does."

Quinn raised an eyebrow in response.

"What?! You weren't there tonight! She's not as sweet and innocent as she looks," chuckled Hayley. "If I have 'boundary issues'," Hayley air-quoted, "she's got possession issues!"

Quinn laughed lightly – it wasn't all that far from the truth.

" _My_ karaoke song. _My_ sweatshirt. _My_ Quinn," mocked Hayley. "She's an only child isn't she?"

Quinn laughed harder in response.

"I may not be ready to climb aboard the Berry boat and be her mani-pedi buddy," smirked Hayley, "But…yeah, I'll be nice."

"Mani-pedi buddy? God, where are you even from?" Quinn jested and playfully bumped Hayley's shoulder.

Hayley bumped her back even harder.

"Friends?" asked Quinn hopefully when she recovered her balance.

"Friends," nodded Hayley.

* * *

' _Home at last,_ ' Rachel thought as she walked the last steps to the sliding door of her loft. Well, home away from home. For as much as she knew that New York would eventually become her new home, everything still felt temporary for now. She was tired and emotionally worn out from the weekend, yet on the other side of the door would probably be a screeching man-boy to greet her and demand to know every little detail of what happened, especially after leaving him hanging. ' _Oh well, back to the real world,_ ' thought…

"Rachel!"

"Hi Kurt."

"Oh my God, _there_ you are! I thought you were going to call me so I could meet you at the station!"

"Sorry. My phone died."

"Oh, I'm glad you're okay. I just woke up from a dream where you were being hunted by a pack of wild Cheerios."

Rachel burst out laughing at the mental picture.

"It was horrible! They were snarling, vicious creatures. Yet…oddly stylish in their slicked back hair and Ferragamo boots…"

"Kurt, I'm fine," chuckled Rachel as she dropped her keys on the side table and threw her bag on her bed. "You don't have to worry about me."

"Hmm," Kurt hummed as he checked her over from head to toe. "You don't look damaged. How's the blouse?"

"I'm afraid it's not going to make it," replied Rachel.

Kurt gasped with wide eyes as he clutched his chest. "No! The poor thing, it had such a short life."

Rachel smiled and shook her head at her friend. "Well, it's a good thing you weren't there to witness the tragedy."

"Sooo…speaking of tragedies. Tell me what happened this weekend! Come sit!" Kurt patted the kitchen stool. "I'll make us some tea and you can tell me all about it."

Rachel had a feeling she wasn't going to get a lot of sleep tonight, but…maybe telling someone all about her and Quinn _would_ be kind of fun.

Rachel nibbled on her lower lip, a smile stretching across her face. " _Welll_ …I have a girlfriend now."

Rachel heard the clang of the kettle bouncing off the kitchen counter and cackled.

"SHUT. UP. You do not!"

"I do. And she's _very_ affectionate. In private at least…"

"Wait, are we talking about Quinn? Blonde hair. Bitchy eyes… Or did you meet someone on the train?" asked Kurt as he filled the old kettle with water and placed it on the stove.

"Ha ha. Very funny, Kurt. I _am_ talking about Quinn and we had a _wonderful_ day today. It's all a little…complicated…but wonderful."

"What do you mean, 'complicated'?" Kurt asked cautiously as he sat down next to Rachel.

"Well. She's not fully out yet-"

"Oh, Lord."

"It's okay though. Perfectly understandable. She's had a repressed, conservative childhood, Kurt. And I don't think her family is necessarily going to be very supportive when she does come out to them."

" _If_ she ever comes out to them."

"Well, I hardly think it will take forever."

Kurt hummed again. "I don't know, Rachel…this still sounds like a bumpy ride for you."

"I don't mind," said Rachel casually, "…especially if it means I get to ride her."

"Eww! Oh. No," Kurt waved frantically. "That's…no, that's not happening while I'm in this loft. There will be no Quinn-riding going on here."

"She's coming to visit in two weeks."

"She's WHAT?"

"Better get your ear plugs."

"Rachel Berry! What's gotten in to you?! I send you off to Yale for one weekend and you come back wagging your tongue like a sailor."

"That's not all this tongue's been doing," Rachel purred.

"Ooookay, stop right there. Change of topic."

Rachel laughed at Kurt's squirming and then sighed at the fresh memories.

"Seriously though. Quinn is…gay? Bi?"

"Decidedly gay."

"Mercy! So all those years you two were swapping boyfriends…"

"I'm not exactly sure. We didn't go in depth, but…she said she's had feelings for me since the beginning of _high school_ , Kurt!"

"Wow. That's one pressed lemon. Brit and Santana were right," said Kurt, shaking his head. "Wait, so who knows about this fledgling romance now?"

Rachel looked up to think back on what had transpired over the weekend. "Well, you and Kyra and Hayley for sure. And Santana, kind of."

"Kind of?"

"Yeah, Quinn was talking to Santana after the party at the train station when she thought I'd left for New York. She was pretty upset, and she was crying to Santana about how much she _loved_ me. It was so sweet. And then I came up behind her and she was so happy to see me, she picked me up and twirled me around. It was a beautiful moment. I felt so loved, Kurt. And then…" Rachel sighed into a bashful smile, "We had our first kiss."

"Oh, sweetie. That does sound deliciously romantic, even if it is Quinn we're talking about. I'm so happy for you."

Kurt looked at her with soft eyes and pulled her in for a hug. "Come here."

"I love her so much, Kurt. I just want to be with her every minute."

The tea kettle began to whistle and Kurt pulled away from their embrace.

"You never explained what really happened at the party. I take it Quinn didn't mean to throw her drink on you."

"No, that was an accident and a big misunderstanding."

Rachel proceeded to clarify what actually happened that night while Kurt prepared their tea. Recounting the drama proved to be wildly entertaining to Kurt, who had a thousand and one questions about Quinn and Hayley.

After almost an hour, in which she had only managed to fill him in on the rest of Saturday and hadn't even made it to today's events, she sat up from her chair with a start.

"Oh my goodness! I was supposed to call Quinn and tell her when I was home safe!" Rachel gasped. "I'm not used to having someone care about my whereabouts."

"I care!" Kurt harrumphed.

"I know you do," Rachel patted him on the shoulder, "But it's not the same, sweetie."

Rachel walked over to her bed and pulled out her phone from her bag. When she plugged it into the wall outlet and it booted back up, she started receiving several missed text messages.

9:45 PM Quinn: " _Hey, you home yet?_ "

9:46 PM Quinn: " _I miss you_ "

9:58 PM Finn: " _Hey Rachel! U back frm Yale?_ "

10:02 PM Finn: " _Ok call me when u get this_ "

10:25 PM Quinn: " _My bed is lonely without you_ _:'-(_ "

10:45 PM Quinn: " _Rachel?_ "

It was now almost 11 PM. Replying to Finn would have to wait until later. Rachel worried her lip and dialed Quinn's number as she stood beside her bed.

"Rach?"

"Hey baby. I'm so sorry I didn't call sooner." Rachel winced. She didn't know if Quinn sounded mad or just concerned.

"I was just getting a little worried. Are you home?"

"Yes, I'm home now. My phone battery died, and then I was bombarded with questions the minute I walked in the door, so I kind of got distracted until just a minute ago when I realized I was supposed to call you. I promise you, it won't happen again. I just need to get used to someone looking out for me."

Rachel could hear Quinn's chuckling at the other end.

"It's okay sweetie. Breathe."

"I just don't want you to be mad at me, Quinn."

"Why would I be mad?"

"Because…I forgot to call you and made you worry?"

"Do you think I'm that sensitive and overbearing?" asked Quinn.

"No!" Rachel thought for a moment. "I don't know. I don't know how this long distance thing works."

"It works by us trusting each other and having faith that the next time we'll be in each other's arms is always right around the corner."

"Okay," smiled Rachel. She let the tension out of her body as she sat down on her bed. "I like that."

"Me too."

Rachel scooted up further on the bed, leaning back against the wall as she pulled her knees up.

"So you miss me already, huh?" Rachel inquired.

"I do," came a soft, sweet voice from the other end of the line. "I wish you were here in bed with me."

"You're in bed already?"

"Yeah, I have that exam in Chemistry tomorrow."

"Maybe you'd like to teach _me_ some chemistry when you come see me," suggested Rachel in her best sultry voice.

Quinn chuckled. "I think maybe I'd like that."

"Are you really going to be able to come down here in two weeks?" asked Rachel, hoping she hadn't changed her mind or found a scheduling conflict.

" _Yes_. I told you I would."

Rachel let out a little squeal of happiness. "Good! Because I told Kurt already."

"Mmm, I bet he was _thrilled_ to hear that," said Quinn sarcastically.

"Oh, he'll be fine. I think he's just a little squicked out right now about the whole concept of there being an 'us'."

"Why do I feel like I'm going to get a lecture from Papa Kurt when I show up at your door, threatening what he'll do to me if I ever hurt you?"

Rachel laughed out loud. "You might. I'll try to convince him that's not necessary, but…I can't make any promises."

Quinn sighed into the phone. "Okay, I'll brace myself, then."

"I should probably let you get some sleep. I don't want you to do poorly on your exam."

"Yeah, I guess so."

Rachel didn't want to say goodbye either. She felt like there was no end of topics she wanted to talk to her girlfriend about, first and foremost being the part about how wonderful that word sounded. _Girlfriend_. Rachel let out a shiver.

"Quinn?"

"Yes, little bear?"

Rachel smiled at her nickname.

"Promise me this isn't a dream? And that I won't wake up tomorrow not being your girlfriend?"

"I promise."

"I love you so much, it hurts," said Rachel as a happy tear dripped onto her bare leg.

"I do too, baby," said Quinn, her voice sounding even huskier as she grew tired. "I'm really glad you came to visit me this weekend and told me how you felt."

"I am too. I love you."

"I love you more."

"Goodnight, Quinn."

"Goodnight, Rach."

* * *

 **A/N, Part Two:**

 **So, hopefully this chapter was worth the wait. Rachel is back safely in New York and Hayley and Quinn have come to an understanding.**

 **And hopefully the last couple chapters have helped to explain why Hayley just didn't want to let go. There is still more to that night between her and Quinn in my head that hasn't been written down. (I need to save _something_ for when the truth inevitably comes out to Rachel! ;-)) But I've tried to portray enough detail about how Hayley and Quinn's mutual attraction had been building up for a while, and given how Hayley's last relationship ended over the factor of distance, along with the huge turn their relationship took that night, she really resents how Rachel has suddenly taken over and shut down everything Hayley thought she had going with Quinn. Quinn is someone who would be very hard to let go!**

 **Now, as for Quinn! Yeah, she's really got herself into a mess with the decisions she's been making around openness and honesty. She also let herself act on her feelings for Hayley a bit too soon, thinking maybe it would stop hurting so much if she just moved on. Obviously it wasn't that easy, especially when she hadn't even talked to Rachel about it. Now she's trying so hard to protect not only herself, but what she thinks are Rachel's best interests, not wanting to give Rachel anything to worry about, which will probably end up having the exact opposite effect if Rachel were to ever find out. Honesty was never her strong point in a relationship.** **(I will probably quote her from season 5 episode 12 later in the story.)** **She doesn't quite get it...yet.**

 **Shaky: does this help explain some of your concerns?**


	14. The Countdown

**A/N:** My longest chapter yet! Hopefully worth the wait. It was a lot of fun to write, but I'm still pretty slow getting it just right, so a chapter like this one can take a while. So if you're interested to know the status of my next chapter, I've been getting better about posting news on my tumblr (daemonrider).

By the way, in case anyone's interested, I finally picked and ending for this little story. There will be at least 8 more chapters after this one, possibly a few more depending on how I split things up. I'll give you all an update as I get closer, but I'm not planning on adding a lot of filler along the way. Lots still to tell though! Enjoy!

* * *

 **Chapter 14 – The Countdown**

* * *

 _Monday, 11 Days until Quinn Visits Rachel in New York_

Rachel could hear the door to her studio apartment jerk open and slam closed, followed by the tired grumblings of her roommate, completely disrupting the romantic thoughts she had been enjoying.

 _Plunk_ went Kurt's keys in the bowl by the door. She wiped her brow and continued working on her project while starting a countdown to herself. " _5…4…3…_ " she muttered.

"OH MY GOD! RACHEL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

' _Hmm. Kurt's a little early tonight,_ ' Rachel mused.

"Hi Kurt. Why yes, I had a lovely day. How are you?"

"What. Are. You. _Doing?!_ "

"Painting."

"Rachel, don't play blonde with me. Why have you rearranged the furniture, destroying my carefully crafted feng shui in the process, and proceeded to paint hearts and a…" Kurt cocked his head and squinted his eyes. "A _calendar_ on our living room wall?!"

"It's a countdown calendar, Kurt."

"It's a what?"

"A countdown calendar! I'm painting a calendar on our wall that counts down to Quinn's visit. Then, when she arrives, she can literally see that I've been counting the days until she arrives."

"Oh sweet Tiffany…" Kurt sighed in exasperation. "Why couldn't you have at least confined your flourish of romance to your bedroom walls?"

"I didn't want her to think I was hiding our relationship in the bedroom. I have it all planned out, Kurt," said Rachel, setting her paintbrush on top of the small paint can. "First, when she arrives next Friday, I'm going to make dinner for her. She'll be tired from exams and the train ride here, so we'll just relax inside the first night. We'll have dinner over here on the floor, Japanese style." Rachel motioned to the cushions on the floor beside the coffee table. "And then we'll move to the couch for cuddling and talking about plans for the weekend," she continued, gesturing to the new, velvety slip cover on their couch. "Followed by a strawberries and cream dessert in the kitchen."

"A whirlwind tour of chez Berry, won't she be impressed," Kurt deadpanned.

Rachel held one hand to her mouth and stage-whispered, "And with any luck, the whipped cream will follow us into the bedroom."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, Pepé Le Pew. I would stop at planning the bedroom activities, and especially not while I'm in the room."

"Oh, I know, I know. Well, except for the choice of sleepwear. I was thinking loose sweatshirt and lacey-"

"LA. LA. LA. LA," Kurt chanted while covering his ears.

"Oh, you're no fun."

"Share the sordid details with your girlfriends. I don't want to hear it," said Kurt as he held up his hand. He continued further into their apartment, heading towards his corner bedroom. "I assume you will repaint once she's gone?"

"Oh! That's the best part! Before she leaves, Quinn and I will paint over the wall _together_. Maybe a mural…something tasteful, of course. But even when new paint covers this wall," continued Rachel as she turned back towards the wall and picked up her paintbrush again, "These symbols of love and time will still be underneath, forever."

Kurt choked with his eye roll and smirked. "You're an obnoxious romantic, Rachel."

* * *

 _Tuesday, 10 Days until Quinn's Visit to New York_

"Okay. There you go, Rachel."

Kurt stood from his laptop while Rachel excitedly clapped her hands at the sight of Quinn Fabray signed in and available on Skype.

"Yay! Thank you, thank you! I'll take my laptop over to the school tomorrow and have them look at it. It was working fine yesterday."

"Probably all the _research_ ," Kurt air-quoted, "on lesbian sex you've been watching."

"Kurt! That's…private, and none of your business!" admonished Rachel in her best crimson red blush. "Besides, I was on my bed, a-and I had _headphones_ on, so I don't know how you…"

"I have eyes, Rachel - not that I didn't want to scratch them out after what I saw – and _you_ have a privacy curtain. Next time, _use it!_ "

"I just want to make sure I'm prepared in case things…advance next weekend."

"Uh-huh. Whatever. Just don't start getting the screen all wet making out with Quinn. Or if you do, clean it off and don't tell me about it," Kurt winced.

Rachel scoffed. "Kurt! Please, we're not in grade school anymore."

' _Dammit…_ ' thought Rachel, ' _there goes that idea._ '

"Mmm hmm," Kurt hummed. "I'll be back in a little while. I'm going to go check out that new pastry shop down the block. I hear they're open late."

"Oh! Bring me back something!"

Kurt sighed. "What do you want?"

"Anything! Surprise me."

"Fine. I'll see what they have. Tell Quinn I said 'hey'…and to watch her step!"

"You can tell her that yourself next week."

Kurt gave Rachel an exaggerated smile and left the apartment.

Now alone and logged in to Skype, Rachel quick-walked the laptop over to her bed and initiated her call to Quinn. She propped herself up on her elbows while lying on her stomach, her legs casually kicking the air behind her.

"Hi, Quinn!" Rachel roared excitedly when Quinn answered and she could see the gorgeous blonde against a familiar backdrop, sitting at her desk.

"Hey, Rach. You finally got your laptop working!"

"No, I'm borrowing Kurt's. Sorry it took me so long."

Quinn laughed lightly. "That's okay. Perfect timing, actually. I needed a few more minutes to finish some writing, but now I'm done for the night."

"Oh! That's great!" Rachel watched as Quinn got up from her desk and moved over to her bed. "I finished all my homework a little while ago, too. So how was your day?"

"Oh, it was…interesting."

Rachel could tell by the raised eyebrow and side glance that there was a story behind those hazel eyes. "Oh? What, another freshman hitting on you?" Rachel chuckled.

"Not exactly," replied Quinn.

"Upper classman?" questioned Rachel.

"Professor," sighed Quinn.

"No! Really?"

"I stopped by my psych professor's office to talk to him about some comments he had made on my last essay. I thought we were having a very deep conversation about human psychology, until he casually put his hand on my knee."

"Oh my god, what did you do?"

"I was stunned for a moment. I froze. I mean, there was that one other professor I told you about, but that was just an awkward pick-up line. This…this was physical contact. It was so…gross, and out of place."

"Eww. Oh, Quinn. I'm so sorry."

"Yeah. Well, it didn't take me long to snap out of it when he took my moment's hesitation as an invitation, and started sliding his hand under the hem of my dress."

Rachel gasped, angry and horrified at the same time.

"I quickly stood up and asked him what the fuck he was doing, and he just brushed it off like I was overreacting, saying his hand slipped and I shouldn't be so 'accusational'."

"Oh, that's horrible. What else did you say?"

"I said I'd report him, but he laughed it off, saying it was just going to be my word against his. I stormed out after that. I just wanted to get away."

" _Are_ you going to report it?"

"I'll talk to the ombudsman and see where it goes. Right now I just want to transfer out of the class and never think about it again, but…we'll see."

"I'm so sorry, Quinn. At least you stopped it before it got any more serious."

"Yeah. Anyway, sorry to be a mood killer. I…I appreciate you listening to me rant."

"Of course, Quinn! You can talk to me anytime, and tell me _anything_. I hope you know that."

"I do, Rach. You've always been the one that's been there for me, for as long as I can remember."

"And I always will be."

Quinn silently nodded. "Thanks, Rach. Best girlfriend ever," Quinn chuckled and sniffed.

* * *

 _Wednesday, 9 Days until New York_

Rachel had just reached the steps of her apartment building when she heard the familiar and always so welcome "I Feel Pretty" playing from the phone in her backpack. Out of breath from the fast walk she had been on to get back to her apartment in time for her planned call with Quinn, she put down her bag and paused for a moment to catch her breath before pulling out her phone and answering.

"Hi, Quinn!" she said between heavy breaths.

"Hey, _there's_ my Skype date. What happened to you? You sound like you've been running a marathon."

"After today, I feel like it…Cassie July kept me after class...apparently my jetés need work," Rachel panted as she tried to get a hold of her breathing.

Quinn chuckled. "Well, I actually think it's a good sign that she's paying extra attention to you. I think she must see something in you. And she's not the only one, I might add."

Rachel smiled into a light blush as she got her breathing under control. " _Really?_ " Rachel asked playfully. "You think someone else has noticed me? Is she cute?"

"Hmm. Good choice of pronouns there. And yes, I believe people have said this admirer is _ravishingly_ beautiful," Quinn emphasized.

"Oh! Humble too, I see. Well, I do hope I get to meet her," replied Rachel, picking up her bag and walking into her building.

"You will. Very soon."

Rachel closed her eyes and smiled tight as she silently bounced in place for a moment, unable to contain her enthusiasm to herself.

"I can't _wait_ , Quinn! I'm counting the days," said Rachel as she started up the steps to her studio. "Nine more, if I'm correct. You're still arriving Friday afternoon?"

"I am," replied Quinn. "And I got my mom to change my flight to leave out of LaGuardia instead of New Haven for October break the following week."

"Yay!" clapped Rachel. "Then I can take you to the airport! Did you happen to change the day, too?"

"Not by much," sighed Quinn. "Mom already made plans for me to attend a cocktail party and dance with her on Sunday night. So the best I could do is to change the flight out to late morning on Sunday."

Rachel stopped mid-flight up the stairs. "A _dance_?"

"I know, Rach. Apparently I had agreed to it in a moment of weakness a few weeks ago when I was emotional and she mistook it for homesickness. Besides, what could I say?"

Rachel frowned at the reality of their semi-secret relationship. She knew this would be a thing for them, at least for a while, but it still always hurt when she was yanked back to reality by something like this.

"I know. It's okay, Quinn. Really, I understand," replied Rachel as she made her way up the last set of stairs and down her hall.

"But listen, you have me all Friday night and Saturday, okay?" Quinn said cheerfully.

Rachel winced as she hissed in a breath. "Well, _most_ of Friday night."

"Oh, _no_...what _else_ is going on?" Quinn inquired.

"I have a mandatory meeting at school with my stage group on our upcoming production. It's only for a couple hours though. Then I _promise_ I'm all yours."

"Okay…I _guess_ I can let go of you for that long," Quinn conceded.

Rachel entered her apartment and let out a sigh of relief. "Okay, home at last."

"Is your laptop working yet?" asked Quinn.

"No, but Kurt left his for me to use again tonight while he's out. He even wrote down instructions for me this time."

Quinn snickered. "Okay, well hurry up and login. I've been dying to see those beautiful eyes all day."

"Oh, can I call you back in five?" requested Rachel. "I'm all sweaty from class. I didn't even change out of my dance clothes, I just ran home as fast as I could."

"Oh yeah? Wait. What do you wear to your dance class?" asked Quinn.

Rachel laughed out loud. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because if it's anything like I imagine, maybe I _want_ to see you all sweaty in your dance clothes," replied Quinn.

"Quinn! You saucy minx!"

"Sexually frustrated minx. Now hurry up and login!"

"Okay, okay," said Rachel as she dropped her bag on the floor and grabbed the laptop. "Perv."

Rachel signed in and immediately got a call from Quinn.

"Hello again," said Rachel as she answered and walked the laptop towards her bedroom, making sure to hide the finished Countdown Calendar project from Quinn's view so that it would be a surprise when she arrived.

"Hey, baby," replied Quinn. "It's good to see you."

"It's good to see you too."

"Now, put the laptop down…" Quinn husked slowly.

"Okay…" Rachel drew out, smirking as she did as she was instructed.

"And step back so I can see all of you…from head to toe."

Rachel giggled as she slowly stepped back. "As you wish."

"Mmm, love it," purred Quinn as she bit her lower lip and looked Rachel up and down, taking in the black dance dress and silky pantyhose Rachel was wearing. "God, what I would do to be your dance partner…"

Rachel gave her a graceful pirouette and then returned to the bed, blushing profusely. "You're crazy, but thank you," she said once she got comfortable on her bed. "So, besides ogling me in my dance outfit, how was your day today?" asked Rachel, still rosy in her cheeks.

"It was better today, thanks. Though I did get more calls and texts from Finn that I neglected to answer."

"Oh? What did he want?" wondered Rachel.

"So…I don't think I finished telling you what he said to me on the phone last Saturday. After excitedly describing his version of your _dinner date_ …" Quinn mocked with one eyebrow raised.

Rachel rolled her eyes. "It wasn't a _date_."

"He wanted me to have a 'girl-to-girl' with you and find out if you were truly thinking of getting back together with him."

Rachel sighed. "Oh dear."

"I just don't know what to _say_ to him. He's going to make me out to be the villain no matter what I tell him."

"Well, don't worry about it. I should probably be the one to talk to him," said Rachel as she thought about the myriad of ways that conversation might go. "What are you comfortable with me telling him?"

Quinn didn't reply right way, but instead looked away for the first time in the entire conversation. Rachel still didn't understand the inner thoughts going on in Quinn's mind when it came to topics like this – not nearly as much as she wanted to – but she gave Quinn as much time as she needed to ponder the question.

"I'm comfortable with whatever you want to tell him, Rach."

Quinn looked up but Rachel couldn't quite read the expression on Quinn's face. It looked like she was still mulling it over in her head.

"Are you sure?" Rachel asked with concern. "I mean, I could just say that it's over between him and me and I'm only interested in being friends, and leave it at that."

"Do you really want him to find out through the Glee grapevine instead?" asked Quinn.

Rachel knew Quinn was right. It was only a matter of time, if it hadn't happened already, before Santana or Kurt started gossiping and rumors would be spreading like wildfire.

Rachel gave Quinn a quick smile in acknowledgement. "You're right. I'll talk to him."

"I can only imagine how he's going to take that, his two ex-girlfriends dating each other," smirked Quinn before she paused. Her eyes then widened and a look of horror spread across her face. "Oh god…Puck…"

Rachel shuddered at the very _different_ , crude expression she imagined will come from Puck's face when he hears about her and Quinn.

"How about…we cross that bridge when we get to it," offered Rachel.

"Yeah. Good idea," Quinn nodded.

"So…Quinn?" Rachel asked tentatively, knowing there was another hot topic on her mind.

"Yeah?"

"I…never got to hear about your conversation with Hayley."

Rachel studied Quinn for a moment. She noticed Quinn stiffen at the mention of Hayley, but she decided to continue. "You mentioned that you two talked after I left."

"I did."

"How'd that go? Does she still insist you should be out _roaming free_ , instead of caged up with someone like me?" asked Rachel, laughing lightly.

"Rachel…"

"Her words, not mine, Quinn," bristled Rachel.

Rachel knew she was letting herself get riled up at the mere thought of Hayley. She supposed it had a lot to do with how she last talked to Hayley herself. There was something about how smug the girl had come across at first that still bothered her.

"Don't worry. She knows how much you mean to me and how badly I want this relationship with you."

"Knowing and honoring can be two different things though," Rachel asserted.

"I told her that we're dating now and she said she would respect that. She'll back off. I'm going to hold her to her word. We're just friends, and that's _all_."

Rachel nodded quietly as she listened to Quinn, and tried to convince herself that it was enough to satisfy her concerns. "Okay, Quinn."

She tried not to think about how it also felt like Quinn was telling her everything she wanted to hear.

"Hey. I _love_ you, baby," implored Quinn as she leaned forward to catch Rachel's eyes. "I won't let her or anyone else come between us."

"I know," said Rachel, smiling furtively to disguise her remaining uneasiness with Hayley, and with Quinn remaining friends with her. She knew that pressing Quinn on the matter any further over a Skype call was not the best use of their time, nor would it likely get them anywhere, so she dropped it.

"I know you won't," Rachel repeated. "I love you too."

"Now, tell me all about this upcoming stage production!" said Quinn brightly, changing the subject. "What's the name of the musical?"

* * *

 _Friday, 7 Days until New York_

Rachel rolled the sliding door open to her studio apartment and let out an exhausted sigh before entering her little oasis of a home. It wasn't much – it was just one large brick-walled studio, partitioned off into two bedrooms, a kitchen area, and a living space – but it had become the perfect little escape from the madness outside, and she'd been looking forward to this moment all day. The past week of classes had been punishing to both mind and body, and with little sleep from all the late night discussions she'd been having with Kurt, she was ready to collapse.

She rolled the door closed and leaned back against it, smiling as she surveyed the place. She had it all to herself for the next few hours, on account of Kurt having an evening class tonight, and she was going to savor being alone. It's not that she didn't enjoy talking to Kurt, she just needed some 'me' time, away from all the prodding and scrutiny. She dropped her keys in the bowl on the side table, tossed her bag on her bed, and pulled out her phone. She knew exactly what she wanted to do first, _and_ second. After one more instinctive, precautionary look around the room, she smiled to herself and began to strip off all her clothes, tossing them in the basket beside her bed. She grabbed her fluffy, white robe from her wardrobe closet and the phone from her bed and headed into the bathroom.

Twenty minutes later, the bubbles were beginning to disappear and the water was starting to feel a little chilly. Rachel opened her eyes and let out a long, satisfied sigh before letting some water out and refilling the tub again with fresh, hot water. She dried her hands and reached over for the phone, checking the time. Quinn should be back from dinner by now, so she tapped Quinn's number and reclined back in the tub.

"Hello?" Quinn answered.

"Hi baby," Rachel cooed into the phone.

"Hey sweetie. Hang on a sec, Kyra and Hayley are just heading out the door," replied Quinn.

Rachel listened to the goodbyes on the other hand as she reached up with one foot and turned off the water, proud of herself for her toe dexterity.

"Okay, I'm back," said Quinn. "How was your day?"

Rachel could hear shuffling and the faint creak of bed springs, and smiled at the mental image of Quinn climbing onto her bed, where she'd sat and slept herself, just a few short days ago.

"It was _exhausting_ ," Rachel sighed, puffing up a breath of air to blow the hair out of her eyes. "I swear Crazy July is trying to break me. Physically or emotionally, she's going to do _whatever_ it takes. Do you know what she said to me today?"

Rachel could hear Quinn giggling, "No, what?"

"She told me I would be great in a Broadway revival of Snow White."

"Well…that actually sounds kinda nice, R-"

" _As one of the seven dwarfs!_ "

"Uh!" Quinn scoffed. "Rude!"

"I mean, I can take the name-calling. God knows, after the last four years at McKinley High, insults on my looks or my physical stature roll off me now," Rachel gestured into the air with a flick of her wrist followed by a splash as she dropped her hand back in the water. "It's just, I thought college professors would be more _supportive_ of my ambitions, not try to tear them down. You know?"

"I do know, Rach. I'm sorry you have to put up with more abuse. That's very cruel," Quinn replied. "Um, where _are_ you by the way? It sounded like water splashing."

"Oh. Yes, you heard correctly. I'm taking a bath."

Rachel heard nothing on the other end of the line until another creak of bed springs broke the silence.

Finally, Quinn cleared her throat. " _Really…_ " Quinn replied heavily. "A bath? So…you're in the bathtub, naked…"

Rachel chuckled at the sound of a very flustered girlfriend. "Why yes, Quinn, that _is_ how one usually takes a bath."

"Oh," was all she heard in reply.

Rachel smirked and decided to draw out the fun. She kicked at the water gently, just loud enough to make sure Quinn could hear the sound. "Mmm. A nice, hot bubble bath was _just_ what my tired, achy muscles needed after a day like today."

She could hear a tight little laugh from Quinn but nothing else, so she continued to play coy. "Though I _have_ been in the water awhile, so, the bubbles really aren't hiding much of anything."

"Rach… _please_!" moaned Quinn. "I'm about to start touching myself here. God, you are such a tease."

"Well, like you said, Quinn. It's all about the teasing, and not about the-"

"Rachel! So help me _God_ , if you finish that sentence…"

Rachel laughed out loud at her sexually frustrated girlfriend. "Don't worry, baby. I wasn't planning on withholding the pleasing from you next weekend."

* * *

 _Saturday, 6 Days until New York_

"Quinn… _please_!" begged Hayley. "Are you _sure_ you won't go with me and Kyra to the party tonight? Just for an hour?"

Quinn chuckled. "You two managed to have fun last night without me. I'm sure you can find a way again tonight."

"But Tim's going to be there, so I'm not going to have a wingman."

"A _wingman_?" Quinn inquired.

"Yeah. Oh! I didn't tell you. It's my new plan for finding a hottie to dance with. I got it from ' _How I Met Your Mother_ '."

"Oh, lord," Quinn smirked and shook her head at what was sure to be another one of Hayley's harebrained schemes to pick up girls.

"I needed _something_ new to do at parties, since _someone_ took herself off the market," challenged Hayley.

"Mmmhmm. And how well did this work for you last night?" asked Quinn.

"Not very well," Kyra interjected from her chair while finishing her makeup.

"Because you didn't do it right!" chided Hayley. "You were pointing out hot _guys_ to me at the same time, totally ruining the play."

"The play…" said Quinn, already feeling glad she was not a part of whatever game this was tonight.

" _Yeah_ , like in football. It works like this: say you and me are dancing close or just hanging out, pretending to flirt. This gets the attention of other girls on our team nearby, drawing out our targets."

"Targets? Nice objectification there, Hayles."

"It's just the lingo, go with it. So anyway, we then choose our next play. If the girl's hanging out at the bar, we might go with the short yardage play, a classic 'end-around'."

Quinn blinked her eyes a couple times at Hayley. "The classic what?"

"It's a bait-and-switch. You'd go up and pretend you're about to buy a drink. Right? Only you'd ask her what she's drinking first. If she's at all nice and seems fun, you could say, 'Hey, that's my friend's favorite drink too.' Then you start telling her what an amazing dancer I am, yada yada, and suggest she buy me a drink. That's when you'd call me over and say, 'Hey, have you met my friend Hayley?' When I pop over, you excuse yourself to the bathroom. We swap positions, and… _bam_! Classic end-around!"

Quinn stared at her friend and shook her head. "You're insane."

"Or! If the girl's a little farther away, we could go with the 'long bombshell'," Hayley chuckled.

"Don't you mean blonde bombshell?" asked Quinn.

"Nah, I'm not picky. Anyway, for that one, you'd head towards the bathroom, but on the way, you catch her eye and then casually lean over to her, pointing back to me, and say, 'My friend over there thinks you're really cute. You should buy her a drink.'

Either way, if it works, I get a free drink, she and I hit up the dance floor, and _then_ we see what happens from there. And if it bombs, we huddle up and try another play!"

"Gotta love football season," said Quinn sarcastically. "Why don't you just go up to the girl and ask her to dance in the first place?" wondered Quinn.

Hayley scoffed. "Because it's more _fun_ this way. Plus, free drinks! And dancing! Come on, Quinn. It'll be fun. You'd be a great wingman," pleaded Hayley. "We can make up more plays, and I wouldn't even have to worry about an interception."

"An interception…"

"Yeah, you getting your hands on one of the pretty little targets first," winked Hayley as she nudged Quinn with her elbow.

Quinn scoffed and rolled her eyes yet again at her highly sexually-charged friend. "As amusing as it sounds to watch you in action, I'm just tired tonight from this week, and I owe Santana a call."

"Ha! You think Santana's going to be available on a Saturday night?" questioned Hayley. "Not from what _I've_ heardabout her she won't."

"Yeah, we'll see, still I'm going to sit this one out. You go have fun. _Maybe_ think about trying some old fashioned pickup techniques instead."

"Whatever," Hayley scoffed. "But you're missing out on the fun…"

Hayley smirked and turned to Kyra. "Ready, short stuff?"

"Ready, slut!" replied Kyra, bouncing up from her desk that had become her makeshift makeup counter.

Quinn snorted while Hayley squawked and playfully smacked Kyra's shoulder. A minute later they were out the door, leaving Quinn in peace.

' _Hayley's probably right about Santana being out, but something tells me she'll take my call anyway,_ ' Quinn smiled to herself as she got comfortable on her bed.

It didn't take more than two rings to find out.

"This had _better_ be Quinn because I do _not_ wish to talk to the midget again," Santana threatened.

"Hey, Santana," chuckled Quinn. "It's me."

"Quinn Fab-gay! _There_ you are. It's only been, what, a whole _week_ since you last called me? Wait, no… that was your _gaymate_ who I last talked to on your phone…that is, until the little garden gnome hung up on me."

"You had it coming."

"So tell me, Tubbers, what's going on? Let's see…it's Saturday, so you must be fat and pregnant by _now_."

"Funny…I miss you too, S. And _no_ , I'm happily dating someone who is _not_ going to get me pregnant…not unless we specifically arrange for that to happen."

Santana said something silently in Spanish that Quinn couldn't hear before continuing. "I can't believe you are finally squeezing the Berry juice. Oh wait, is _that_ why you said your boobs were sticky last week? No, on second thought, _don't_ answer that."

" _That_ was a whole margarita mishap that I'm sure Rachel would love to tell you about someday," replied Quinn.

"It's so weird to hear you call her by her natural born name. Does she really know to answer to that?"

" _Yes_ , Santana, and you'd better start using it around her, too."

" _Dios me ayude_. How the _fuck_ did I not see this coming?"

"I come from an uptight Christian family. I hide it well."

"Britt was _so_ right about you two."

"So you've told Brittany?" asked Quinn.

"Are you kidding? That was the highlight of my weekend calling her up and telling her she was right. She is _so_ excited to give you both hugs next time she sees you, by the way."

Quinn chuckled lightly and then sighed. "Well…I suppose all of Glee club knows by now."

"Nah, I got you covered. I told Britts you were probably still _sniveling_ in the gay closet, with the door only half open, so we should keep it tight until we heard from you."

Quinn smiled to herself at how her friend _always_ seemed to have her back, even now.

"Thanks, Santana. Rachel wants to break it to Finn first before he hears it from anyone else, so yeah it would be nice if you'd wait a bit before cranking the rumor mill. And then there's my parents… _that's_ another story entirely. Not ready to go there yet."

"I know, I figured. So holy shit, Quinn, when did you realize you wanted to press lips with…" Santana made a gagging sound. "Ugh, there's my dinner again…with the hobbit?"

"It's _Rachel_. R-A-C-H-E-L. I _know_ you can learn how to spell it because I taught you every cheer you knew at McKinley."

"Whatever."

"And…yeah, she's been on my mind for a _long_ time."

"Like, since junior prom? Or wait, since we joined Glee Sophomore year?! _Holy shit_ , you were getting _off_ on those pornographic pictures of Rachel in the bathroom, weren't you?!"

"No, not exactly. I went through an angry denial phase for a while, but…yeah, it's been a few years. Totally repressed it."

"Did you ever have the hots for any other girl? Me, for example?"

"I've not had ' _the hots'_ for you, Santana. Nor would I admit it if I did."

"Maybe _that's_ why you wanted to be on top of the pyramid so bad. You just wanted to grab my ass! Wanky!"

Quinn chuckled and put her free hand up to her head in exasperation. "You're so full of yourself."

Talking to Santana was both exhilarating and exhausting sometimes. "I _miss_ you. When am I going to see you again?"

"I don't know. I was thinking of going back home for break in a week," replied Santana.

"You have an October break too? I fly in on Sunday from New York."

"From New York?" asked Santana, puzzled.

"Yeah, I'm taking the train on Friday to see Rachel, and then flying out on Sunday morning."

Santana barked out a laugh. "Whipped already."

Quinn scoffed. "Like you wouldn't do the same thing."

"Yeah, I would." Santana chuckled. "Especially if I knew I was going to get some tailwhile I was there."

Quinn's cheeks flushed and for the first time she was so happy Santana couldn't see her right now.

"We're not talking about that, Santana."

" _My girl going to get some Berry boo-tay_ ," sang Santana while Quinn reddened even further.

"I hate you," chuckled Quinn.

"You love me. So, things going pretty well then, huh?"

"Yeah, they really are. Mostly."

"Mostly! Uh-oh. What, you got another girl on the side you need to get rid of?" laughed Santana.

Quinn paused for a moment too long to avoid the complicated situation she was thinking about from last weekend.

"Jesus, Quinn, I was kidding. What the hell is going on there?"

"I don't have another girl, S. It was just…complicated for a while. But it's all resolved, just a little raw still."

"Does this have anything to do with the Hayley chick you mentioned when you were bawling your ass off on the phone last Saturday?"

Quinn sighed. Too late to avoid the topic now. "Yes."

"Quinn, don't make it complicated. If this thing with the hob… _Rachel_ …is serious, you can't be having a girl in every port like Auntie Tana here."

"I _know_. It's just, I let things go a little too far with Hayley when I was depressed about getting so close to Rachel and thinking I had no chance with her. I mean, all I've ever heard from her is _Finn_ , _Finn_ , _Finn_. And then Hayley was there, so sweet and empathetic, and…fuck, I made everything so complicated."

"How's Rachel handling it, knowing her competition is just down the hall?"

"She…um."

"Jesus, Q, she doesn't even know, does she?"

That thought alone was enough to ignite the fear Quinn had been holding back all week, and it felt like the dam had just burst. "No-o," whimpered Quinn into her phone as her hands began to shake. "I mean, she knows Hayley likes me because, well, Hayley's been pretty obvious. And they had a fight just before Rachel went back to New York on Sunday," said Quinn, barely finishing the sentence without her voice breaking from the flood of emotions coursing through her.

"Hobbit put the smackdown on her?" Santana asked, incredulously.

Quinn choked on a sob at Santana's reply. "You know Rachel…ploughs through anyone and anything in her way…"

"Quinn, sweetie. You have to stop crying every time we talk about Rachel or that's all I'm going to remember you two for," joked Santana in a way that only she could get away with around Quinn.

Quinn laughed into her sobs for a little while until she could get her emotions in check.

"I've managed to dig myself a fresh hole again," she sighed. "I had so many chances to just explain to Rachel what she should know about Hayley and me, and I just bailed every time. I even led her to believe that I was never _interested_ in Hayley, justifying it by telling myself that _technically_ , what I told Rachel wasn't a lie. I mean, all I said was I wasn't interested in her _at that moment_ , when we were talking about it."

"That's fucked up, Q."

"All I could think about was protecting Rachel from anything that could possibly hurt her or our relationship."

"And in the process you managed to hide the one thing that _will_ hurt her when she does find out. And you _know_ she will, sooner or later," insisted Santana.

"I know. I don't deserve her. I've _never_ deserved her. I'm such an idiot."

"Yeah, you are. You and me both. Been there, done that too."

"What do I do, Santana?"

Santana sighed long and hard into the phone. "There's only one option, Q. You rip that Band-Aid off. Pull it hard and quick. It's going to hurt like hell now because you left it on too long like the dumbass that you are. But you gotta do it, and you best do it soon."

Quinn nodded to herself. "I know."

"Look, I'm sorry. I gots to run. My cheerleaders just showed up and we're heading out on the town. I'll see you soon though, okay? Focus on your girl now. Do the right thing and you two will be okay. You got me?"

"Yeah," sniffed Quinn. "I will. Thanks…I'll see you soon."

* * *

 _Sunday, 5 Days until New York_

Rachel stopped her pacing and looked up at the Citizen wall clock in the living room. It was fifteen minutes past the time she texted Finn that she'd call, and the conversation wasn't sounding any easier in her head the more she ran through it.

"This is ridiculous," she said out aloud. "This is _my_ life, and I can choose who I _want_ to date. That's all there is to it."

She nodded, pretending to believe it would be that straightforward, and picked up her phone, dialing Finn before she could talk herself out of it again.

"Hello?" came the sound of her ex from the…the…what was she holding? Her mind had gone blank.

' _Oh God, not ready!_ ' a voice screamed inside her head. She pressed 'End Call' and threw the device on the couch as if it were on fire.

It started making a ringing noise again.

She blinked a few times and took a deep breath before reaching out to grab the…thing…the phone, and accepted the call.

"Hey," she said, her heart pounding out of her chest. "Sorry. I dropped the phone."

"That's okay. I figured something like that. How are ya?!" asked Finn.

"I'm okay…really good, actually."

"Yeah? Good! You know…I've been thinking about you a lot since our dinner last Friday night. It was really nice…seeing you, I mean."

"Yes, it was nice seeing you too. I enjoyed catching up with you again." Rachel chewed on her lip trying to remember how this was all supposed to come out.

"In fact, I'm going to be in New York again soon, and then I'm heading back to Lima."

"You are?"

"Yeah, I've had enough of the backpacking and, well I kinda ran out of money. So, Burt said I could work at his garage. And then maybe by next summer, I could have enough saved up to move to New York…and then we could be together, you know?"

"Oh, Finn. I think you got the wrong impression last week."

"Oh. No, I understand. I mean, we don't have to rush into anything. I just know that you like planning for the future. And…I kinda always saw my future with you. I miss you, Rach."

"Finn, no," Rachel shook her head emphatically. "No. That future between us…it's changed. We can't go back to that."

"Why? I thought we had a really good time, and you seemed all excited and everything. You even had that sparkle in your eye that I remember seeing when we were dating," Finn insisted. "Unless…"

"I'm dating someone now."

"You're…oh."

"I'm sorry, Finn. You'll always be special to me. I just don't have the same feelings for you anymore."

"When did this happen? You…were you dating this guy last Friday? I don't remember you mentioning anyone."

"That's because we only started dating last Sunday. And actually, if you'll remember, I mentioned her a lot."

"Mentioned who? Wait, what do you mean _her_? I…I don't understand. You're not _gay_."

"I never said I was straight, either."

"Rach, you're not making any sense. Who are you dating?"

Rachel sighed to herself. This conversation was already way off track. She hadn't counted on Finn being so persistent about rekindling their relationship, not when she was about to hit him with the truth that she was in an entirely new one – one that she knew he wouldn't understand.

"I'm dating Quinn."

"Wha…? That's not even funny. Look, just…please just be straight with me and tell me what's going on."

Rachel sniggered at the double entendre that was going right over his head. "I'm serious, Finn. Quinn and I, as of Sunday, are dating. Kurt and Santana already know, and…well, I'm telling you now because I wanted you to hear it from me. I didn't want you to hear it from anyone else – partly because I knew you wouldn't believe it – but also because you deserve to know the whole truth, firsthand."

"This is bullshit. _Quinn_?! You can't be dating Quinn! You were never even _friends_ with her. She…she was horrible to you. And since when is Quinn gay? Rachel! This is all some kinda sick joke they're playing on you."

"No, it isn't. She loves me, and I love her."

"NO YOU DON'T, RACHEL! Have you lost your mind?"

"Please don't yell at me, Finn."

"This is _Quinn_ we're talking about. How can you say you love someone who tortured you day after day?"

"She's not like that anymore!"

"She lies and manipulates people for her own gain and…and she's nothing but a moody, manipulative _bitch_! She doesn't love you! She's never loved anyone but _herself!_ "

"Finn, calm down, all right? That's simply not true."

"I can't believe you would fall for someone like her. You're going to get yourself hurt."

"If you can't accept that she is much more than we ever gave her credit for, that she can be warm and gentle and loving, then I…"

"Then you what?! This is insane…I'm so done. Good luck, Rachel. Call me when you've realized what a big mistake you've just made."

The phone went silent. Rachel's mouth was still open, ready to dispute everything Finn had said about her girlfriend, but it was over. It felt like every emotion was hitting her at once. Echoes of Finn's angry words were still ringing in her ears, battering and bruising her heart. How could she be so naïve as to think that this could possibly have gone amiably?

She wanted so desperately to run into Quinn's arms and bury her head in Quinn's hair. She wanted to be hugged tightly and told that everything would be okay, by the one person who could always brighten her day.

Rachel ran into her bedroom as her lower lip began to quiver and dialed Quinn's number.

"Quinn?!" she cried when Quinn answered.

"Hey baby, what's wrong?" replied Quinn.

"I just got off the phone with Finn," sobbed Rachel.

"I take it that didn't go so well."

"No…" cried Rachel, her voice cracking. "I wish you were here right now."

"Me too, sweetheart. Me too."

* * *

 _Thursday, the Eve of Quinn's Visit to New York_

Quinn carefully placed one last outfit in her roller suitcase before laying her gift for Rachel on top.

"Well, I think that's everything for a week," said Quinn.

"You pack pretty light for a weeklong break," Hayley remarked, hovering over Quinn's suitcase and scrutinizing the decidedly _un_ -stuffed bag.

"I'm going to take advantage of my partially filled closet at home and wear some of the clothes I left behind," responded Quinn. "So I really only need the essentials, plus some outfits for New York."

"Got something sexy picked out for your lady?" asked Hayley with a waggle of her eyebrows. "I saw some nice heels going in there when I walked in a minute ago."

Quinn chuckled at where her hormonal friend's mind always seemed to be. "I've…got a couple choices. It was hard though. I don't want to be presumptuous, but I want to be prepared, you know?"

"Well, if you need any help deciding, I'd be happy to tell you how hot they'd look on you on a scale of 10 to mouth-watering," quipped Hayley.

"Down, girl," scolded Quinn.

" _Teasing!_ " laughed Hayley. "I can still comment on my hot friend."

"Just not when-"

"Rachel's here," finished Hayley. "I know! So how's she doing? She's going to be _so_ excited to see you tomorrow."

Quinn smiled at the effort Hayley was making to 'play nice' and at least fake an interest in Rachel. Admittedly, it was getting much less awkward every day around her. "I talked to her about an hour ago, and I can tell she's getting stressed. Whenever she's freaked out, she talks about twice as fast and twice as long. It's adorable."

"Aww. Well, you two are going to have fun, even if it's only a couple days."

"Yeah. I hope so," frowned Quinn.

"What do you mean?" asked Hayley, sitting down on Quinn's bed while Quinn set the bag on the floor.

Quinn let out a heavy sigh and sat down beside her. "I'm thinking of telling her about our little fling."

Hayley's eyes grew comically wide. "Why would you do that?!"

"Because she probably deserves to know the truth," replied Quinn in a lower, shaky voice. "But it's not something I'm going to blurt out over the phone."

"You don't sound convinced that you _want_ to tell her."

"Full disclosure is not exactly one of my natural tendencies in a relationship," said Quinn, smiling meekly. "I tend to withhold information to keep people from getting hurt."

"Who are you protecting? Them or you?"

"Hey! I'm not telling you this in exchange for a therapy session," said Quinn as she stood from the bed again.

"Okay. Okay. I'm just trying to understand," replied Hayley in a calming voice. "I'm not opposed to your sudden openness. I'm just wondering why tell her _this_? Why now?"

"Partly it's something that Santana said. Rachel's going to find out sooner or later. She's very perceptive. And while I was only trying to save her from having to worry – because it _was_ just a one-time fling between us – if she gets the wrong impression and thinks that the reason I haven't told her is because I'm trying to hide it from her…it's just going to blow up out of proportion."

"I suppose that's a good point. So when are you going to tell her?"

"I don't know. I haven't figured that out yet. I'll think about it on the train ride down there," sighed Quinn, looking at the clock on the wall.

Hayley stood from the bed and picked up her sweater hanging from the chair. "Well, do what you think is right, Quinn. I'll support you however I can. Just…call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks," replied Quinn softly.

"I'll stop by and see you off tomorrow morning before I head out, okay?"

"Okay, bye Hayley."


	15. To Tell You the Truth, Part 1

**A/N: Just a quick note to summarize my answers to what have become the bulk of my reviews lately. Quinn has some interesting character flaws in this fic, ones that I would argue are an extension of those portrayed in the show. She's not some one-dimensional, shallow character. I'm trying to portray her as complex and very human. The result is not always pretty, but this is a journey, and I want to make it entertaining to read. I find character flaws fascinating and fun to play with, but I promise you, you will see character growth if you keep reading.**

 **With that said, I would love to read some reviews about something else besides just 'what an ass Quinn is being', but I realize at this point in the story, that may be asking a lot. ;-) Ah well. Just try to keep it respectful, yeah?**

* * *

 **Chapter 15 – To Tell You the Truth, Part 1**

* * *

 _New York City, Grand Central Terminal_

" _LAST STOP…GRAND CENTRAL_ ," bellowed the announcer over the train's PA system, in case anyone hadn't yet noticed. Quinn carefully placed her reading glasses in her case and returned the bookmark to her book of Poems of Emily Dickinson as the train slowed to a crawl. She'd been studying one of the more morbid ones on death and dying, and hoped it wasn't an omen for her trip.

As the aisles filled with travelers waiting to exit the train, she did a quick check in her compact mirror and then smoothed out a few wrinkles from her sundress. After one last look around she gathered her bags and stood in front of her seat, waiting for a gap in the line of human traffic so she could exit the train.

"After you, gorgeous," offered a middle-aged suit with a wink.

As if the knot in her stomach weren't already tight enough, the sudden creep factor managed to twist it just a little bit more. Don't they know how that sounds?

Quinn's years of social training kicked in and before she could think of a wittier retort, she responded with a 'thanks' and a quick smile.

She exited the train and made her way to the bustling main terminal, adrenaline pumping, both nervous and excited to see her girlfriend. She held on to her wide-brimmed hat with one hand as she looked around.

"Quinn!" shouted a familiar and excited voice not far away. "Quinn!"

She turned towards the source and smiled until she laughed out loud at the happy brunette racing towards her with outstretched arms. Quinn had just enough time to drop her bags before Rachel crashed into her. They held each other tightly for several minutes before pulling back and looking into each other's eyes.

"I know it's only been two weeks, but I've _really_ missed you," cried Rachel with a few tears of joy in her eyes.

"So I see," chuckled Quinn. "I missed you too, little bear." Quinn kissed her forehead and closed her eyes as she pulled Rachel back into another hug. " _So_ much."

Quinn let go of Rachel just enough so their heads could part and she could see the megawatt smile on her face, but she wasn't about to let go of her just yet. She held on to Rachel loosely, one hand around her waist while the other slowly threaded through the brunette's hair, silky and smooth to the touch with a light, floral scent, just how she remembered.

Their eyes locked on to each other and Quinn stopped breathing for a moment as she gently dragged her hand down from Rachel's hair to her chin, pulling her closer until their lips met. Rachel's hands slid up Quinn's back and held on tight as she let out a soft, whimper of a moan. Quinn tilted her head slightly to the right and pressed her lips harder into the kiss as she threaded her fingers through Rachel's hair once again. Rachel opened her mouth in response and let Quinn's tongue enter and touch her own, twirling them together once again. Quinn pulled Rachel in tighter and deepened the kiss, then retracted her tongue, inviting Rachel's to follow, until they both parted momentarily for a breath and a smile. Rachel stared into Quinn's eyes again, completely captured.

Quinn blinked and pressed her lips against Rachel's again. "I love you so much, Rach."

"I love you too, Quinn," Rachel replied, returning a full kiss back.

"I still can't believe you're actually saying that to me," said Quinn, gently shaking her head.

"Well, I _mean_ it," said Rachel, touching a finger to the end of Quinn's nose.

Quinn bit her lower lip, tempted to lunge forward again, but decided to save it for later. "Can I give you something now?" asked Quinn.

"Quinn, I don't know if you realize, but you've just kissed me in front of a thousand people. I think you already have," replied Rachel.

Quinn blushed into a smirk. "No, I mean this," said Quinn. She squatted down by her bags and unzipped the main compartment, pulling out a small, wrapped present, and handed it to Rachel.

Rachel's eyes opened wide in surprise. "Oh! For me?!"

" _Yes_ , silly. Open!"

Rachel let out a happy squeal and turned to run over to a nearby bench where she could sit down. Quinn grabbed her bags and followed the bouncy brunette, sitting down next to her as she clawed open her present.

"A Gund teddy bear! Oh! He's so _cute_!"

"That's so my little bear has company at night when I'm not beside her," Quinn supplied.

"Aww! Quinn, you're so sweet. Thank you!" Rachel squeezed him tightly to her chest and breathed in. "Mmm! And he smells like you!"

"I may have spritzed him a few times with my perfume."

Rachel looked over with a tight, happy smile and soft eyes, and wrapped her arms around Quinn in a tender hug. "Thank you," she whispered.

* * *

On the cab ride to Rachel's apartment, they exchanged stories from the past week at school. Rachel had more Crazy July stories to tell and Quinn had tales from stressing out over midterms. But the thought that was on their minds the most was the next twenty-four hours they had together.

Stepping out of the cab, the sight, sound, and even smell of New York rushed in to greet Quinn. She stood on the sidewalk by the cab and looked around, taking in the enormity of it all, while Rachel paid the driver.

"Wow," said Quinn when Rachel approached. "I'd forgotten what it felt like to be in the middle of this city."

"Overwhelmed?" asked Rachel, curiously.

"No. It's just so alive…and _begging_ to be explored," grinned Quinn.

"Well, I'm glad you feel that way," said Rachel, picking up one of Quinn's bags. "Because tomorrow I was hoping we might do just that!"

"Sounds good to me," Quinn replied, following Rachel towards the steps of her apartment. "So _this_ is the humble abode of Hummel and Berry?" she asked matter-of-factly, looking at the old brick building. The outside wasn't actually in too bad of a shape, and there were a few, small oak trees lining the sidewalk that were changing to fall colors. "Rather quaint, actually," smiled Quinn.

"It's not a bad neighborhood, really," agreed Rachel, looking around at the top of the steps before opening the door. "Only a couple blocks from the subway, too."

"Oh, well why didn't we take the subway here and save some money?" asked Quinn.

"Well, I thought you'd probably had enough of trains today," Rachel explained. "Besides, we'll have plenty of that tomorrow, and I can't wait to show you my place! Sorry there's no elevator."

"It's fine, Rach."

Quinn smiled to herself. She couldn't help feeling like the luckiest girl in the world right now to be the subject of Rachel's never-ending concern and attention for her well-being. It's something that most people didn't seem to realize about her. Beneath that driven, confident personality, Rachel cared deeply about everyone who was riding along with her on the road to stardom. Quinn just hoped she could maintain her place alongside her without screwing everything up and getting kicked to the curb. Santana's advice played through her head again for the zillionth time, ' _Rip the Band-Aid off, Q. Pull it hard and pull it quick._ '

"Okay, third floor, this is us," said Rachel jubilantly as she opened the door from the stairwell to the hallway.

Quinn sighed. "Hey, do you think we'd have some time to talk before you have to go to your thing tonight?"

"Talk? Like 'in private', talk?" probed Rachel.

"Yeah."

"Well, I'm not sure when Kurt is leaving. But we'll have time after that," said Rachel, looking a little concerned.

Oh right, Kurt…

"Why, is everything okay?"

"Oh, yeah," said Quinn, shaking her head nonchalantly to convey that it was nothing to worry about now. "Later is fine."

"Okay," said Rachel softly, looking into Quinn's eyes with a quick smile. She turned the key to her door and slid it open halfway. "Darling, we're home!" Rachel announced into the apartment as she poked her head in. "I brought a visitor. Are you decent?"

"A visitor?! Prithee, who is it this time?" Quinn heard in some odd, pompous accent from the other side of the door. "Step aside, afford me a gander…"

Rachel opened the door the rest of the way and stepped aside for Quinn to enter. "I present to you, the fabulous and elegant…Miss Quinn Fab-ray," continued Rachel as she twirled her hand and bowed, gesturing towards Quinn.

Kurt walked towards them from the kitchen. "A Fab- _ray_ ," drawled Kurt, one hand on his hip. "Oh, no. I hear they're pompous and arrogant. Escort her away immediately! I will have nothing of her sort sullying this good house."

Quinn pursed her lips with both hands on her hips as she stood at the doorway and glared at him.

"Darling, you _promised_ you'd give her a chance. You _must_ ," pleaded Rachel. "for I have a confession to make. She's not just any lady, she's…she's my _lover_."

Kurt gasped in mock horror. "Lover?! _This_ common tavern wench?! Never!"

Rachel stood up straight and huffed, looking offended while still playing her part in whatever weird scene she and Kurt had going.

Quinn, on the other hand, had heard just about enough, and rolled her eyes.

"Okay, that's it Lady Hummel. Me and you. Outside," Quinn pointed towards the door.

"And let you mess up this pretty face before I go out on the town? I think not," said Kurt, dropping his eyes and pulling Quinn in for a friendly hug. "It's nice to see you, Quinn."

Quinn hummed. "You as well. Do you two greet all your guests this way? Because if you're wondering why they haven't come back…"

"Oh, I just like to challenge Kurt on his skills at improv," Rachel waved off Quinn's humor as she brought her bags in from the door. "He's taking evening classes while he waits for another chance to audition for NYADA."

"Charming," deadpanned Quinn. "Keep working at it."

"In fact, if you'd rather go with him tonight instead of tagging along with me…" Rachel offered.

Kurt and Quinn's eyebrows both shot up in panic as they turned to face a smirking Rachel.

"I don't think Quinn would like this group," Kurt quickly suggested.

"I'm fine hanging out with you, Rach," Quinn followed.

" _Okay_ …" conceded Rachel, laughing as she gave Quinn a quick peck on the cheek. "Well then let me show you around!"

"Don't get lost," quipped Kurt.

Rachel ignored him and grabbed Quinn's hand. "Welcome to our humble little abode."

"It's bigger than I expected for New York," said Quinn looking around.

"Well, it's really just one large studio. We had a lot of help from my dads setting things up for the two of us," said Rachel as she looked around. "This is our efficient little kitchen. Bathroom's in the corner there," Rachel pointed behind Quinn's left shoulder. "And over here in this corner," Rachel pulled Quinn to the right. "is our living room. I thought perhaps we could eat here tonight, in front of the old fireplace."

Quinn looked around, a little jealous. "Wow, this is amazing. You two actually have quasi rooms."

"I know! Kurt and I had so much fun decorating. Kurt came up with the cubby hole wall," Rachel gestured towards the divider in the middle, separating the living room from his bedroom.

"Don't forget your art project," said Kurt from the kitchen.

"Art project?" asked Quinn.

"I was getting to that, Kurt!"

Quinn looked over to the wall on the same side as the sliding door and noticed a large painting above the fireplace.

"What's this?" Quinn asked as she walked closer to it.

"It's a countdown calendar I started the day I came back from Yale."

Every day of the two-week calendar had been crossed out, and it was ringed by painted white flowers and red hearts, and sprinkled with gold stars. Quinn put her hand to her heart and her lips parted slightly as she looked up at the words 'Rachel misses Quinn' written in script atop the calendar.

"I hope you don't think it too silly or childish," said Rachel, coming up behind Quinn and resting her head on Quinn's shoulder as she hugged her from the side. "I was just having a little fun while I was literally counting the days until you came."

Quinn turned into the hug and pulled Rachel in tightly. " _No_ , I think it's _sweet_. No one has _ever_ done something so romantic for me."

"Well _that_ is just inexcusable," replied Rachel. "You'd better prepare yourself for more where that came from, Fabray. You deserve _so_ much better."

"I deserve a _drink_ after listening to this," quipped Kurt from the kitchen.

After showing Quinn the rest of the place and leaving her bags in the bedroom, the three made drinks and sat on the couches in the living room. Quinn and Kurt managed to have a civil conversation, in part due to Rachel keeping the discussion to safe topics like redecorating their place, her daddy's recent visit when he was in town for a medical convention, and Kurt's internship and his evening community college classes.

Rachel glanced at the clock on the wall and noticed it was time to go.

"Well, this has been fun catching up! But I think Quinn and I should get going."

"Oh! Look at the time," said Kurt, glancing over where Rachel was looking. "Improv waits for no one!"

"Will we see you later tonight?" asked Quinn.

"Oh, um. Rachel was thinking– _ow!_ " Kurt winced in pain as Rachel not so subtly kicked him. "Rachel _and I_ were thinking it would be a good idea for me to spend some quality time getting to know my classmates better after class."

" _Did_ you now," said Quinn, raising an eyebrow while turning her head to look at Rachel.

"Professionally a smart move," said Rachel innocently. "After all, it's all about who you know in this town."

"Yes," continued Kurt. "So I won't be home until _very_ late tonight, if at all–"

The three of them jumped a little when Quinn's phone, which was on the coffee table, started playing what was becoming a familiar tune to Rachel, that of Darth Vader's theme song.

Quinn sighed as she picked up the phone. "I'll just be a sec and we can go."

"Okay," Rachel mouthed as she and Kurt got up from their seats.

"Hey, S. What's up?"

"Hey, what did I catch you in the middle of?"

"Nothing. I was just about to tag along with Rach to her first stage production meeting."

Santana scoffed. " _Rach_? You're on to cute nicknames now?"

Quinn made a mental note to keep 'little bear' private for a little while longer. "Jealous much?"

"Whatever. Listen, change of plans. Ditch the hobbit and her boring class, you're going out with me."

Quinn's brain did a somersault trying to understand what Santana just said. "Excuse me?"

"Loosen the reins and put on your skinny jeans, I said we're going out! I'm sitting here in my swanky ass hotel room, lacing up my fuck-me pumps, and we're going to have a girls' night out. Midg… _Rachel_ can join us when class is over."

"Santana…what are you doing in New York?"

Quinn looked up at the thud from Rachel's hairbrush hitting the floor, and then over to Kurt's mouth that was now stuck open with a Triscuit cracker hanging out.

"And why are you in a hotel?" continued Quinn, looking back at her shoes.

"Long story, I'll tell you over tequila shots, but basically…I had to see the Fabgay couple for myself."

Quinn didn't respond right away as she tried to sort out this news in her head.

"She hasn't _ditched_ your sorry ass yet, has she?" asked Santana when Quinn waited too long to respond.

"N-No!" Quinn stuttered as she shook her brain to reboot it. "Wait, Santana…I, uh…hold on."

Quinn put her hand over her phone and looked over at Rachel, who was now staring wide-eyed back at her, apparently waiting patiently to be filled in.

"Santana's here. In New York," said Quinn, mildly panicked.

"Oh god," said Kurt after finally swallowing, holding a hand to his chest. "It's a sign of the Apocalypse. Next come the locusts."

"Santana?!" asked Rachel in disbelief.

"Yes! She's calling me from her hotel room. I had no idea she was coming here. Did you?" returned Quinn.

Rachel vehemently shook her head 'no'.

"She wants to go out for drinks…"

"I'm outta here," said Kurt, raising one hand as he headed towards the door. "Good luck, ladies…"

Quinn sighed in exasperation. She had a bad feeling she wasn't going to get any time alone with Rachel tonight. "What do you want to do?" Quinn turned back to Rachel after Kurt had left.

"Well…she's here. Why don't you go out with her?" suggested Rachel. "It's going to be a lot more fun than going to class with me. I'll catch up with you guys later…if you want. Or I can just wait for you here."

"I am _not_ abandoning you for Santana!"

"It's _okay_ , Quinn. _Really_ ," Rachel implored. "You would be so bored at this meeting. Go!"

Quinn whimpered and frowned as she slowly put the phone back up to her ear.

"You're lucky this time, Santana. Next time I don't care if you've rented a suite at the fucking Trump Hotel."

Santana chuckled. "Yeah, yeah. I'll text you the directions. Oh, and make sure your girl doesn't wear anything with animals on the front…"

Quinn huffed and put her phone away. "Sorry, Rach. I'm sure we can get rid of her before long."

"No matter. My plans for tonight kind of already fell apart."

"At least she's staying at a hotel and not parking her shit here," offered Quinn.

"True."

Quinn walked over to Rachel and wrapped her in a tender hug. "I'm sorry."

A few moments later her phone buzzed from Santana's text.

"I should really go or I'll be late," Rachel sighed, looking up to Quinn with a sad frown.

"I'll forward you the directions. You'd _better_ come rescue me!" insisted Quinn.

"I will…in a couple hours. Here, take my key and lock up when you leave, okay?"

Quinn looked at the key in Rachel's hand and her heart skipped a beat. She imagined for a moment what it would feel like if Rachel were actually handing _over_ the key to her place, for Quinn to keep. She couldn't deny how much that appealed to her.

"O-Okay. I'll see you soon," replied Quinn, still entranced by the gesture.

Rachel grabbed her purse and then walked towards the door with Quinn following. She turned around and reached up behind Quinn's neck and pulled her forward, planting a long, wet kiss on Quinn's lips.

Quinn's eyes remained closed and her mouth slightly open when Rachel pulled away.

"Try to stay sober for me until I get there?" Rachel chuckled as she opened the door.

"I will," Quinn breathed out as she blinked and returned Rachel's smile.

"Bye, baby."

* * *

Quinn twirled the key in her hand, staring at it while the city lights passed by outside the cab window, watching as reflections of red and green bounced off the shiny metal surface. It was funny, she thought, how such simple pieces of metal could hold so much meaning. Like a ring on a finger, or a locket on a necklace. Or in this case, a key to a door. Rachel's door.

Rachel entrusted Quinn with the key to her door. Such a simple, logical thing to do in that particular moment. Yet at the same time, Quinn longed for it to mean so much more – more than simply being entrusted with the safety of belongings. Metaphorically, Quinn was holding the key to Rachel's heart. Rachel had willingly given it to her two weeks ago. And how was she repaying her? By keeping secrets? By telling lies? Yes, they were lies, Quinn reminded herself. Even omissions of truth were still lies. Was this any way to forge a relationship? She hadn't changed _one bit_ since high school. ' _So_ stupid, Quinn. You've got a long way to go…'

"61st and Central," the cabbie stated. "Sixteen dollars even."

Quinn handed him a twenty as she opened the car door. "Keep the change."

Quinn stepped out into the evening air and tapped out a text to Santana.

Quinn: " _I'm here_ "

Santana: " _About time! Come to the bar in the piano lounge, you'd fucking better have brought fake ID_ "

Quinn's heels clicked through the hotel lobby as she followed the sound of the jazz piano to the lounge. Pretty swanky for a hotel bar. Santana always knew how to pick them.

She spotted the dark-haired, former Cheerio leaning against the bar laughing with a couple young ladies. She watched, before she approached, as the three of them all popped a shot back at once and laughed.

"You're unbelievable, you know that?" Quinn scolded as she came up behind Santana, still a little pissed about the unannounced visit that was cutting in to her Rachel-time.

"Hey, Q-ball!" Santana's eyes lit up as she caught sight of Quinn. "You showed up!" She turned back to the other two as she stood up straight. "Excuse me, ladies. My bitchy old cheer captain is here. It was nice meeting you."

The other two bid them goodbye and Santana pulled Quinn over to a couple empty barstools and sat down. "Hey," she shouted at the bartender. "A line of lime tequila shots for me and my girl."

"ID?" he asked Quinn.

Quinn pulled out her fresh new ID from when Hayley had dragged her out almost a month ago. Sadly, this was only the second time she'd used it. The first being the same night she got it.

Once the bartender had handed it back and turned around, Santana grabbed it out of Quinn's hands before she could tuck it back in her pocket.

"Hmm. Looking pretty good, Emily," Santana snickered after reading off Quinn's name on the card. "Must be all the Hawaiian sun."

"Thanks, Rosario. Not so bad yourself. Now how about you tell me for real what you're doing here in New York?"

"I told you, _Emily_ ," said Santana as a bowl of salt, lime wedges, and six tequila shot glasses were lined up in front of them. "I had to see you and Rachel together for myself. Oh, and Britt made me promise to take pictures. Extra points if your tongue's down the midget's throat." Santana smirked and made a lewd show out of licking her hand before sprinkling on the salt.

Quinn guffawed as she applied the salt on her hand. "Uh huh. Perverts."

"Hey, if Britt were _here_ , she'd have you licking that salt off someone's stomach before the night was over."

Quinn frowned in contempt and rolled her eyes.

Santana motioned to Quinn to pick up her first shot glass. "So when's your better half going to be here, anyway?"

Quinn picked one up and clinked it against Santana's. "A couple hours." They both tilted their glasses back and set them back down on the table. "When are you _leaving_?" asked Quinn as she bit into her lime wedge.

Santana laughed as she picked up another glass. "Don't worry. I'm not following you home to your little love shack." They both tilted back another, skipping the salt.

"Not that I'm complaining, but how are you affording to stay at a place like this? And again, I ask, _why_?" inquired Quinn after she'd set down her second glass.

"For one, while the spectacle of you and Rachel wooing each other is something I can't wait to behold," began Santana as she pointed with her shot glass at Quinn. "Kind of like a scene from a horror movie that you can't turn away from, you know?" Santana contorted her face and set her glass down a little harder this time. "The sound of you two bumping uglies in the middle of the night is where I draw the line."

Santana picked up the third shot and Quinn rolled her eyes again while following suit.

"Secondly, I've decided to leave Kentucky," said Santana as she downed it and slammed the glass on the counter.

" _What?!_ " Quinn shot out after emptying her third.

"Withdrew the money my parents put into my account for meals, rerouted my plane ticket through New York, and booked me a room at this bitchin' hotel as a going away present to myself."

Quinn stared at her friend in disbelief. No, on second thought, she decided a moment later, this _was_ believable. It was just the initial shock she always felt when hearing the latest chapter of Santana's neurotic life story that always gave her a moment of pause. The girl had _no_ clue what she was doing next.

"And then after break, I'm moving to New York."

"Holy fuck," choked Quinn, her head now spinning from more than just the alcohol. So much for her not having a clue. "Are you serious?"

"I like it here. It's more my speed. Besides, if Porcelain can do it…" Santana shrugged. "Hey! Booth!" exclaimed Santana as she jumped up from her seat and yanked Quinn with her towards a couple that was just standing up to leave.

They slid in to the corner booth and within a few minutes, a young blonde waitress with warm hazel eyes and a round face came by to take their next order.

"Plate of nachos," said Santana, "Long Island Iced Tea…and your phone number." Santana winked.

Quinn shook her head while the waitress chuckled.

"The first two I can do. The number you'll have to work harder for," smirked Dani, according to her nametag.

Not a total shutdown. Santana's gaydar must be improving, thought Quinn.

"Santana," offered the Latina as she extended her hand, "and this is my friend, Quinn."

"Pleasure," nodded Dani. "And what will you have, Quinn?"

"Glass of Chardonnay, please."

"Sure, back in a minute, ladies."

Quinn picked up where they left off, still intrigued by the news of Santana's move to New York. "So, what are you going to do here?"

"I'm actually thinking of giving NYADA a shot. Whether it was cheerleading or stage, I kind of miss all the performances, you know?"

"Where are you going to stay?" continued Quinn.

"I don't know yet. I heard your girl has a pretty big place…"

Quinn chuckled at the thought of the two of them and Kurt all trying to get along. "You really think that would be a good idea? I hear murder carries serious jail time when you're over eighteen."

Santana waved her off. "I've learned how to handle Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee. Besides, then I could keep an eye on you two," winked Santana.

"You're funny…good luck getting them to let you move in. So what happened in Kentucky that made you want to leave so suddenly?" asked Quinn.

Santana filled her in on all the good, bad, and ugly experiences that led her to wanting to get the fuck out of there while Dani continued to stop by occasionally and refresh their drinks. An hour later and Quinn was starting to get very jealous of her friend's future in the city, _especially_ the possibility of her living with Rachel.

The next time Dani returned, she chatted with Santana for five minutes before asking if Quinn wanted anything. Maybe Santana would get her phone number after all by the end of the night.

Quinn had been nursing her second glass of wine, and she was still feeling a buzz so she decided to ease off.

"Just a water and lemon, please," replied Quinn.

"The fuck, Quinn?" Santana scorned once Dani had left. "You're quitting already?"

"No. I just promised Rachel I'd be sober when she got here is all."

" _What?_ Why would you do that?" Santana asked, giving Quinn a very perplexed look. "It's a Friday night and you're out with your best friend in fucking _New York City_. She's not going to hold you to that promise!"

Quinn shrugged, unsure how to answer that. There were so many reasons – because of recent bad experiences involving excess alcohol, because she knew she needed a clear head if she was going to talk to Rachel tonight, because Rachel had asked and she'd do _anything_ right now just to please her. She wasn't sure _which_ answer was more important and relevant right now. So she decided on the easiest one to explain.

"I don't know. The last time I was drinking with her, it got out of control. I ended up ignoring her half the night and she ended up wearing my drink. I don't think I want a repeat."

"Sounds to me like someone is just pussy-whipped already…"

"I'm not… _whipped_ , Santana," Quinn corrected. "Everything with Rachel is just… _different_. You know what she gave me today? She gave me the key to her apartment. Do you have any idea what that meant to me? I see a future with her. I want to make her happy. Everything just got real all of a sudden and I'm scared I'm about to screw it up. So excuse me if I just want to be careful right now."

Santana scoffed and let her glass bang down on the table. "Okay Tubbers, you want to be real? Let's cut through the crap and be real here for a second. You two have known each other for years now, and she has seen you at your absolute _worst_. God only knows why she is interested in you after the way you treated her. I'm looking forward to asking her that myself. But let's not pretend this is about you being scared she's going to run away when she's presented with some quirky new character flaw in the mysterious but troubled Quinn Fabray. No, what you're scared about is that she's going to go ballistic when she finds out you lied about the other woman in your life."

Quinn huffed and looked away for a moment before replying. "If you're referring to Hayley, how about we _not_ call her the other woman. We're just friends."

"Oh that's _such_ bullshit, Quinn. Hayley's wanted to get in your pants from day one and Rachel got to witness it firsthand. Rachel will never consider you two 'just friends'. She will _always_ be the other woman here."

"But you make it sound like I have something going on with her on the side, and I _don't_. She's _not_ going to come between me and Rachel. I'll never let that happen."

"Please, _every_ time we've talked about you and Rachel over the last two weeks, you've started crying to me about how you've fucked everything up somehow. And you know whose name always comes up next? Hayley. She's on your guilty conscious, Q. So _guess what_? She already _has_ come between you two because _you_ \- _fucking_ \- _let her_ ," Santana gestured by poking an accusatory finger towards Quinn.

Quinn took an uneasy breath and sighed.

Dani came back with their drinks and set them down on the table without saying a word. Santana gave her a quick smile but then returned her attention to Quinn, who was staring off in another direction, her eyes starting to look a little redder. She sat back for a moment and studied Quinn.

"You know what I don't get though? What the hell are you so worried about? I mean, we all know that you're notorious for keeping your feelings to yourself. And if you had a lady boner for this Hayley chick before you started dating Rachel, so what? Even though you denied it at first, you know Rachel is going to forgive you once you come clean about it. So what else is going on, Quinn?"

"Nothing!"

"Are you _really_ over Hayley?"

" _Yes!_ "

" _Then what are you hiding?_ "

" _I had sex with her, all right?!_ "

Quinn leaned back against her booth seat, covering her mouth with one hand as tears spilled over and down her cheeks.

"You had sex…with Hayley?"

Quinn nodded.

"Holy _shit_ , Q. The queen of celibacy? Jesus, you used to be such a prude! College has really been quite educational for you hasn't it?"

"Fuck you."

"Okay, okay. I'm just…wow. I did not see that coming. I thought when you said things went a little far that you were just making out in your dorm basement or something. Ho-ly shit!"

" _Not_ helping here."

"I'm sorry. So wait, when did this happen? Have you two been doing it since you started dating Rachel?"

" _NO!_ "

"Okay, well, saving grace there."

"It was just that one night."

"Oh, _just_ that one night. Right after saying goodbye to Rachel…yeah, that will go over well," Santana added sarcastically.

"I've regretted it ever since."

Quinn knew she could always count on Santana to give it to her straight and not blow smoke up her ass. Even though she hadn't intended on telling Santana the full story about her fling with Hayley, it was probably for the best that she had. She anticipated a much worse time telling Rachel, and maybe somehow this would help her prepare for that. She felt both guilty and defensive about that night, and defensive was not what Rachel was going to want to hear.

"The weekend with Rachel…it was amazing. We spent the whole time talking. She slept in my bed, we–"

"Boring…"

"No, it was nice. But God, did it hurt to think it was all platonic, that she'd just never be into me the same way I wanted to be–"

"Into her?" finished Santana with a quick wiggle from one eye.

"It was killing me, and I know it was stupid on my part, but after Rachel left, I asked Hayley over. I wanted to tell someone about my feelings for Rachel. For once I just wanted to come out to someone. And…many wine coolers later."

"Wine coolers again? Seriously, Q?"

"Suddenly it was over. I had come out, and she was coming on to me pretty strong. She asked me if I wanted to know what it was like to be with a woman. And I just…I don't know…in the state I was in at the time, I think I just wanted to pretend I could let go of this high school fantasy I'd been clinging to and prove to myself that I could be happy and move on. So, I said yes."

"Did your roommate ever find out?"

"Almost by accident, but no. Kyra stayed over at Tim's that night. And then literally like five minutes before she walked in the door the next morning, I woke up with a start to find myself with a splitting headache and no clothes on, next to an equally naked Hayley, and I just freaked out. I practically threw her clothes at her and made her swear never to tell anyone."

"Such the charmer."

"I felt like trash, Santana. For doing that to Hayley _and_ for giving up on Rachel without ever giving her a chance. If I had just _told her_ …God, I'm such an ass."

"Yeah you are," Santana said lightheartedly.

"Thanks."

"You should have hooked up with me instead," Santana added with a wink and a smirk. "If all you wanted was to experiment, I could've rocked your world. Rachel couldn't have blamed you for wanting to get a piece of this." She pointed two fingers towards herself.

"Santana…"

"I'm just saying… _but,_ since you're obviously still hung up on the hobbit instead…" Santana mock-sighed.

"You know you're going to have to tell her, right? She's not going to remain oblivious. It's not like this is Finnocence you're dating here. She's probably already figured out a lot more than you know."

Quinn closed her eyes and thought back to all the conversations she'd had with Rachel over the last two weeks. How many times had Rachel told her, practically begged her, ' _you can tell me anything, Quinn_ '?

How much _did_ Rachel know? Was she just being stoic and waiting for Quinn to let her down like everyone else has?

Quinn sighed and dropped her head down onto the table, contemplating her fate while Santana finished off the rest of her drink.

"Oh. My. _God_ ," ranted Santana a few minutes later. "Rachel, when did you become a smokin' hot chica?"

Quinn's head shot up from the table at the sound of Rachel's name, to find the gorgeous brunette walking up to their booth, wearing heavier, duskier makeup than when she had left.

Rachel blushed at the compliment and gave Santana a quick hug hello. "Thank you, Santana," chuckled Rachel. "Did you drink my poor girlfriend under the table?"

Rachel sat down on Quinn's side of the booth and slid over, planting a kiss on Quinn's cheek, which was still noticeably damp after the recent interrogation by Santana.

"Sweetheart, your eyes are red. Have you been crying? What's the matter?"

Quinn could only look at the light of her life, the aforementioned woman of her high school fantasies, and stare into her eyes, not knowing how much longer she'd be allowed to after tonight.

"Santana, what did you do?!" demanded Rachel, looking over to Santana.

"I didn't do anything!"

"Baby, what's wrong?" said Rachel, turning back to Quinn. "I'm sorry it took so long to get here. I just wanted to put on a little more makeup."

Quinn took a breath and brushed a loose strand of hair behind Rachel's ear. "You look beautiful."

"Well then tell me what's going on? You're scaring me."

"Let's go for a walk, Rach. I need to tell you something."


	16. To Tell You the Truth, Part 2

**A/N: To all those who have been patiently waiting for this chapter and the resolution to my cliffhanger, I'm sorry for how long it took to update. Just about everything that could delay it did - from dissatisfaction with my original plans, to my first writer's block, to more rewrites than I thought possible, and just a whole lot of life getting in the way. Hopefully you'll like how it turned out though. I'm also happy to have had the help from an amazingly talented and brilliant author and reader, Relina, who provided invaluable critique and really helped bang this chapter into shape. Hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

 **Chapter 16 – To Tell You the Truth, Part 2**

* * *

Rachel lurched forward, tugged out of her thoughts, barely hanging on to Quinn's clammy grip when the light changed and they crossed the street to Central Park. Nightfall had transformed the previously tranquil landscape into bright flashing yellows and reds, adding a harsh staccato to the warning beating in her chest. Her fear was palpable now. Never in her recollection had a solemnly spoken phrase like "I need to tell you something" or "we need to talk" been followed by anything good, and Quinn's present silence on the matter was not helping.

 _This is it,_ she cried to herself as she tried to piece together what could have happened in the last few hours away from Quinn. _Another dream is coming to an end,_ she thought. _She's probably been telling Santana how she can't handle a long distance relationship with me right now. Maybe she's finally given in to Hayley's persistent flattery, the appeal of dating someone who could hold her in their arms every night just too much to resist, especially when all I can do is talk her ear off on our Skype dates. Or maybe she fell for that tall, pretty brunette at the gallery. She's probably more on Quinn's level intellectually than I could ever be. Did she convince Quinn to attend her show after all?_

Rachel glanced over at her girlfriend with sadness in her eyes. Quinn seemed distant and preoccupied with getting them to wherever she was trying to go to break the news to her. She should have known this could never work. Quinn would always have dashing, young gentlemen and beautiful, talented women pursuing her, no matter where she lived. Why should she settle for someone like Rachel? Why settle for someone living in a different town for at least the next four years? It didn't make sense! Did it?

 _Screw logic,_ Rachel countered in her battle against her logical self. _I don't care how hard it might be. I know what I want, and I want Quinn!_

Rachel's fear and anxiety continued to evolve as Quinn wordlessly guided her through the park. Maybe she was being too selfish. Maybe something had happened to Quinn or to a family member.

She'd never find out at this rate.

Rachel tried to encourage some form of conversation. Anything. The awkward silence was killing her.

"Quinn, are you going to tell me what's going on anytime soon? Are–are _you_ okay?"

"I'm fine, Rach," she replied with an attempt at a smile and a squeeze of Rachel's hand.

Clearly she wasn't fine, though. She still had tears in her eyes and wasn't forthcoming with anything to assuage Rachel's fears. And now, Rachel could begin to feel Quinn's hand…shaking?

Rachel couldn't take it any longer.

"Quinn, I demand that you tell me what's going on," Rachel insisted as she stopped cold in her tracks, her voice already starting to crack. "If you're going to break up with me, just do it and get it over with."

Quinn jerked her head over to Rachel, a surprised look on her face as she finally broke her silence. " _Break up_ with you? No, Rach. That's not what this is at all."

"Well then what _is_ this all about?" Rachel questioned, still a little worried. "You've been wanting to talk to me privately, and…we've been apart for two weeks. And now I find you crying to Santana? I thought maybe you'd decided the distance was too much."

"No, sweetie. It's not that." Quinn sighed.

 _Sweetie_. _She's still using terms of endearment—that's encouraging at least_.

"Well then why are you being so melodramatic? I thought that was _my_ job," Rachel said, tugging jokingly at Quinn's hand, attempting to infuse some lightheartedness into the air.

Quinn almost smiled and pulled her over to a nearby bench, letting go of Rachel as she sat down herself, placing her hands gracefully in her lap. Rachel stopped short though and stood next to Quinn, crossing her arms and waiting patiently for an explanation.

Quinn looked up at her with sad, pleading eyes. "Aren't you going to sit down?" asked Quinn.

"That depends. Are you going to _talk_ to me?" asked Rachel in return.

"Yes. I am. I'm sorry. There's just…there's something you need to know, and you're not going to be happy about it. I _know_ you keep telling me I can tell you _anything_ , but…I'm having a really difficult time figuring out how to say this."

Rachel sat down with a worried frown but tried her best to encourage Quinn. "Baby, it's okay. Just tell me what's going on. I'm here for you."

"Rach, I've not been completely honest with you. And you deserve more. You deserve the whole truth."

"About?"

Quinn took a deep breath. "About Hayley and me."

 _Hayley…_ The thudding in Rachel's chest came back full force. _No no no. Not Hayley._ That's not a name she wanted to hear right now. "What do you…what do you mean, Quinn?" she asked, tentatively.

"I was starting to develop feelings for her, before you and I started dating."

"I—I don't understand. When I last went up to Yale to see you, you told me you weren't interested in her."

"I know. I remember. But at that point, my interest in her didn't matter any longer, not compared to you…" Quinn took hold of Rachel's hands and looked into her eyes. "It meant nothing compared to what's happened between us. I can't imagine being with anyone else now."

Rachel knew Quinn was trying to sound convincing but she just wasn't feeling it. Her head was spinning from the rewrite Quinn was suddenly making to recent history. It was one thing to be worried about Hayley's interest in Quinn and how involved she was in Quinn's daily life. But to think that the attraction was mutual? That Quinn would soon be back there, seeing Hayley on a daily basis?

"Rach, say something."

Rachel looked down to her lap. " _Say something_ "? There were so many emotions brewing in Rachel's head, she wasn't sure where to begin putting them into words.

"I suppose I should feel flattered that you feel that way, and that you chose me," Rachel offered, looking back up at Quinn, "but I don't understand why you've been hiding this from me, unless you're not quite over her."

"I promise you, there's nothing there."

"Nothing? There was obviously _something_ , Quinn. You lied to me and led me to believe that the interest was only one way, when really you were falling for her too. What am I supposed to think?" questioned Rachel. She closed her eyes and shook her head in an attempt to fight the visualization of Quinn being affectionate with Hayley. A knot was forming in her stomach, and it was starting to hurt.

"Rach, I'm just trying to be open about what was really going on. It had become unnecessarily complicated when all I wanted was simple."

"Simple? Do you think our _relationship_ is going to be simple? Quinn, I…" Rachel shook her head lightly. "I can't help but wonder if deep down inside, you've been harboring doubts and having second thoughts all this time about jumping into a relationship with me when you're already attracted to someone as lively and beautiful as Hayley, who's practically right next door. I'm needy. I'm bossy. I don't share. A–and I'm a hundred miles away. What makes me worth that kind of complication?"

"Isn't that obvious?" Quinn reached up to softly caress Rachel's cheek. "I _know_ you, Rachel. I find your demanding style endearing, and I've wanted you for what feels like forever. And now here you are, my _girlfriend_."

"Or to some, I'm simply your B-F-F from New York."

Quinn frowned and dropped her hand back to her lap. "Rach, that's not fair…"

"I'm sorry, Quinn. I just wonder, what's going to happen when you go back to New Haven? You spend every day with this girl you were 'starting to develop feelings for'. What if these feelings start creeping back? Are you going to end up telling her the same thing some night? What if _I_ come to mean nothing compared to her?"

"That's not going to happen," Quinn insisted.

"Does she already know your feelings for her?" Rachel continued to probe.

"She knows," Quinn nodded quietly.

"Have you…been intimate with her?" asked Rachel, her voice less steady.

Quinn closed her eyes and visibly deflated, slowly letting out a sigh.

Rachel suddenly realized she had asked a question that she wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer to, but it was too late to take it back now. Her eyebrows began slowly lifting as Quinn remained silent. After what felt like eternity, Quinn finally responded.

"That's the other part of the story that you need to know. She and I had a moment one night. We were talking and flirting. She came on to me hard, and I…" Quinn stumbled and paused as she shook her head. "I didn't resist any of her advances. I just let go. I'm _so_ sorry, Rach. It was wrong, it was unfair to her, and I never should have…"

Quinn paused again.

"Never should have what, Quinn?"

"I never should have slept with her."

Rachel yanked her hands out of Quinn's. "You _what_?"

"I'm _sorry_. I know I should have told–"

" _When?_ " asked Rachel, lips starting to quiver.

"It was before we were dating."

" _When_ , Quinn?!" A mixture of fear and hurt spilled across Rachel's face.

"The night after you left from your first visit," Quinn said quietly.

"The night I—the same night you came out to her?" Rachel asked wide-eyed, raising her voice.

"Yes." Quinn grimaced.

"Because it's funny." Rachel trembled, a tear tracking its way down her cheek. "I remember you telling me in the park about a tender _moment_ you two had, but I don't recall hearing the part where your _clothes_ came off!" Anger was now mixing in with the hurt as Rachel's mind began picturing the two of them together.

"I was a little drunk."

Rachel threw her hands up in exasperation. "Oh! Of _course_ you were. Sex and alcohol seem to go hand-in-hand with you."

"Rachel…"

Quinn carefully tried to grab at Rachel's flailing arms, but Rachel avoided her reach and pointed an accusatory finger back at Quinn.

"No, it _does_ Quinn. You're loose when you're drunk! Loose and uninhibited. I watched your exhibition with Hayley on the dance floor the other weekend. If I hadn't been there to interrupt you, I think it's obvious now where that would have gone."

Quinn clenched her jaw and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing cooly. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm trying to do the right thing here and set the record straight. I know this is hard to hear. I just felt you deserved the truth."

"The time to tell me the truth about this was _weeks_ ago, Quinn! I actually wondered last weekend if the attraction between you two was more than one-sided, but I kept my mouth shut because I was too scared to ask. You had a chance to tell me about it when we were talking about your little moment with her and coming out that night…or hell, even when I _asked_ you if you had settled everything with her. But you didn't! You said _nothing_! I thought you would have learned by now how important openness and honesty is in a relationship, but it looks as though _nothing's_ changed!"

"Rach, I'm _sorry_. At the time, it just made more sense not to tell you because I didn't want you to be hurt by something that didn't matter anymore."

"Quinn, I don't want to hear about your feelings through a goddamn filter! I can't help wondering now what _else_ you haven't told me."

Rachel paused for a moment before tearfully asking her what she was most afraid to ask.

"Do you still have feelings for her?"

"No!" replied Quinn.

"Are you two still having sex?"

"No! I'm not fooling around on the side, Rachel!" said Quinn firmly. Her hands flexed with insistence. "It was a one-night fling before you and I started dating."

"I want to believe you. I do. But how am I supposed to really know? Maybe you just don't want me to be hurt," said Rachel.

"I've _never_ outright lied to your face since we've become friends," said Quinn.

"But you've been lying by omission, and that's just as bad," countered Rachel.

Quinn fell silent, and Rachel noticed a tear coming down from her eyes when she finally looked over at her. Her rigid posture was slackening.

"How can I fix this?" whispered Quinn meekly.

"I don't know…I don't know that there's anything you can say right now. This is a lot to take in. I would've rather heard that you'd had meaningless sex with that girl from the gallery than for it to have been Hayley."

Rachel stood from the bench seat, an uneasy feeling settling in her stomach.

"Where are you going?"

"I don't know, Quinn. I think I want to be alone for a while," said Rachel as she started to move.

"Wait!" begged Quinn, getting up from the bench too.

Rachel crossed her arms and turned to face Quinn. She'd quickly made up her mind and she really didn't want to explain herself.

"Rach, don't leave like this. Let's go back to your apartment. We need to talk about this," pleaded Quinn.

"I need some space, Quinn."

"Rach…please don't _leave_ me."

"I'll call you."

"Tonight?"

"I don't know…" Rachel replied with a curt shake of her head. The pause in her movement suddenly reminded her that she was missing something. "I need my key back though," she said as she unfolded one arm from her stance and held it out expectantly.

" _What?_ "

Quinn had a sudden panicked look on her face Rachel didn't understand. Had she lost the key? Did she forget she was holding on to it?

"My _key_ …" Rachel tried again, "To my apartment?"

* * *

Rachel absolutely hated leaving Quinn in the park, but the hurt was overwhelming. Her temper was flaring, and she didn't want to say something she'd regret. Looking at Quinn, all she could think of was her naked in bed with Hayley, limbs entwined and writhing, lips pressed together. It was too easy to imagine and vivid enough to make her physically ill, but imagine it she did—over and over as she sobbed in the cab ride back to her apartment.

She looked out the window as the tears fell down uncontrollably from her cheek. As the meter ticked away and block after block passed by, every couple she saw walking hand-in-hand made her more and more upset. Some were laughing as they walked and talked, others were just leaning their heads together smiling, and it reminded her of the time she and Quinn had spent together on the streets of New Haven, and of how she had wanted to spend the weekend here in New York.

Was she overreacting to Quinn's confessions? Technically Quinn hadn't cheated on her because they weren't going out at the time, but the lies and misdirection sure made it feel like she had anyway. In her mind, they had been getting closer ever since last summer, and Rachel felt like they were on the verge of starting something that first weekend—the same weekend Quinn decided to veer towards Hayley. This wasn't the Quinn she knew! It's not like Quinn to throw herself so casually to anyone! There was obviously something deeper going on between them, and that was worrisome to her. Would she be on pins and needles now every time Quinn went back to Yale?

She needed time to collect herself and think. Why was this really bothering her so much? Was it her fear of Hayley, or her anger at Quinn?

 _Damnit, Quinn! Why did you have to make everything so complicated?! Why didn't you just tell me how you felt sooner?!_

The cab pulled to a stop outside Rachel's apartment. She felt lonely already. Coming back here without Quinn was definitely _not_ part of the plan tonight.

She paid the driver and exited the vehicle, stepping to the sidewalk, half-hoping somehow Quinn would be in a car right behind her. For the first time in this big city she called home, she felt at a loss for what to do. Now at the bottom of the steps to her apartment, she considered whether to take a walk or just go upstairs and call Kurt. Not wanting to see anything right now to remind her of what she was missing with Quinn, she decided to take a walk and call Kurt along the way.

Kurt finally picked up on the third ring of her second attempt at calling him. Obviously she was disturbing him, but she didn't care right now. She needed to find a foothold to brace herself against all the thoughts that were swirling in her head, making her dizzy.

"If you're calling to get Santana off your back, I'm not–"

"Kurt…" Rachel sniffed into the phone.

"Uh-oh. What's the matter?"

"Kurt, remember the time I was worried about Hayley sinking her claws into Quinn before I got the chance to?"

"Oh mercy, this doesn't bode well," replied Kurt.

"Well." Rachel's voice cracked a little as she realized how unprepared she was to hold it together. "Apparently she already did. Literally."

"Oh sweetie…I'm sorry. I've been so afraid she was going to hurt you. What happened?"

"She _slept_ with her, Kurt!"

Rachel's grip on her phone started to shake a little as the enormity of the news hit her once again. She wanted someone to hold her, but the only one she wanted to be held by was Quinn.

" _Get out!_ Quinn?! Celibacy president, my ass. When did this happen?"

"Right after I left, the first weekend I visited her. I _told_ you I had a feeling there was something going on between them."

"Jesus…"

"She said that was the only time, but…I don't know, Kurt."

"You don't know what? Do you not believe her?"

"I _want_ to believe her, I do, but this was more than just some experiment, Kurt. She was starting to fall for Hayley too."

"She _told_ you this?"

"Yes. I mean, she said her feelings for Hayley are nothing compared to her feelings for me. And it sounded like she was trying to be completely honest with me now to make up for her silence about this before. But, I'm still worried. They're going to see each other every day. I trust her intentions, but I'm not sure about her long-term commitment. There's also the matter of her history with cheating in relationships."

"I don't want to burst your bubble, Rach, but this is exactly why distance usually kills a relationship. If you can't trust her commitment to you…" Kurt sighed before continuing. "Where are you now? Do you need me to come pick you up?"

"No, I'm on a walk around our block. I left Quinn at the park after she told me everything. Kurt, I don't know what to do. I can't help thinking Hayley may have been right. Maybe starting a relationship with her right now when we're living so far apart isn't such a good idea."

"I think Hayley may have had ulterior motives when she said that, Rachel…"

"I know, of course she did. But it doesn't mean it isn't true."

"I think you need to search within yourself. What does your gut say to do right now?"

"For the first time since I started having feelings for Quinn, my gut says I'm a little scared of dating her. I think the reality of being in a relationship with someone who is so secretive with their feelings has finally hit home. I don't know what to believe, or what she's hiding from me. I don't know how to trust her."

"Do you still want it to work?"

"Yes! God, yes. I want to be with her so badly, and I _think_ she wants it too. But I'm just _scared_ , Kurt. I don't want to get blindsided like this over and over. I don't know if I can be in a relationship where I feel like I have to constantly worry about what she's holding back. She's got to be completely open and honest and start trusting _me_!"

"Do you think she's capable of that?"

"I _know_ she is, Kurt. I think she's trying to open up to me. I felt that tonight. I think she just needs to know that for me, there is no other way this will work…"

"Maybe you should start by telling her that."

"Yeah. Maybe."

After ending the call with Kurt, Rachel tucked away her phone and began to think in earnest about the uneasiness she was feeling towards her relationship with Quinn. They'd jumped in so quickly after discovering their hidden love for each other, she'd not really had time to think seriously about what it would be like to date her. They had very different approaches to openness in a relationship, that much was obvious. Could she love Quinn despite these differences? Would Quinn ever truly open up to her and trust her with her feelings? Or would tonight just serve as a setback and convince Quinn to go back to her old ways?

Nothing came to her as she walked past one apartment building after another. She began to think how different this city neighborhood was from her walks with Quinn around Yale. The architectures were a stark contrast from one another, and its inhabitants lived at a much different pace with markedly different goals and ambitions. Would their two personalities clash as sharply as it would to place New York next to the Yale campus?

* * *

Rachel was still deep in thought and almost back to her doorstep when her phone rang. It was Quinn. She was torn about talking to her just yet. She let it ring a good four times, only answering it on impulse just before it went to voicemail.

"Hello, Quinn."

"Rachel." Quinn's voice was cracking. "Where are you? I can't stand this…being in the same city and not seeing you."

"I'm on a walk."

"Can I see you soon? We need to talk about this."

"You're right. We do, Quinn."

"I need a chance to explain how I feel, what I _know_ is in my heart, what being together with you means to me. I will do _anything_ to prove it to you."

It broke her heart to hear Quinn so upset, but she didn't want to cave in like her heart was telling her to at the sound of Quinn's voice. She needed to know Quinn's level of commitment, but she also needed to know how much uncertainty she was willing to handle.

"You say that now. What about tomorrow? What about next week when you're back pal'ing around with Kyra and Hayley? When can I stop worrying that I'm not one lonely night away from losing you to her?"

"Rach, I _love_ you…"

"I want to believe that, Quinn…I just don't know how."

They were both silent for a moment. Rachel could hear sniffles coming from the other end of the line.

"Can I _please_ come see you now?" begged Quinn.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea yet. I just got off the phone with Kurt, and I—I just need to think about everything."

"Okay," squeaked Quinn an octave higher. It was killing Rachel not to tell her to just come over right now so they could kiss and make up all night long. But there was something nagging her in the back of her mind that told her that wasn't right. If she let Quinn rush back in to her arms right now, she might be burying her own feelings and, in doing so, poisoning their relationship with pent up hurt and anger. She needed to get straight in her head what she needed from Quinn _before_ she saw her again.

"Can you stay with Santana?" Rachel asked, hoping that at least her friend could offer her solace for now.

"Yes," replied Quinn.

"Good. I'll, um… I'll call you. I just need some time."

"Okay," confirmed Quinn, her voice sounding a little stronger now. She couldn't be sure though. Quinn could have a stoic demeanor one moment and melt down the next when she was alone. For once, she was actually relieved Santana was in town.

She ended the call and immediately wondered if she'd done the right thing by keeping Quinn at arms' length for now.

* * *

Rachel stepped into her apartment and slowly closed the door behind her. Tired and alone, everything from the evening—everything that was on the line—suddenly hit her all at once. She leaned back against the door and quietly began to sob, slowly sliding down into a heap on the floor. Did Quinn really want her like she said? Or was this all part of Quinn's own insecurity with herself, and was Rachel just the closest security blanket she had right now? How could she possibly know the truth if Quinn's story kept changing? She wanted to talk to her, but she just didn't know what she should expect from her.

She remained that way on the floor for some time, head leaning back against the door in silent tear-stained reflection on everything that had been said that night. It wasn't the sex with Hayley that was bothering her so much, she finally realized. It was the admission of feelings for Hayley, and the threat posed to their fledgling long distance relationship which really concerned her. How could she stop from worrying about that every night they talked to each other? How was Quinn going to convince her it wouldn't be an issue, she wondered?

She pondered this some more and suddenly realized that was it. She _had_ to know what Quinn's answer was to all of this. The burden didn't have to be all on her. Quinn said she had more to explain, so then let her come over and explain how this was going to work, dammit! She was about to reach for her phone and call her over when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

Had Kurt come back to comfort her and forgotten his keys again? Or was Quinn defying her orders to stay put, showing up anyway, determined to state her love in no uncertain terms? She smirked at her desire for over-the-top romantic gestures, obviously from having read one too many romance novels over the summer, and quietly hoped for her Quinn-in-shining-armor to be on the other side of the door.

She quickly wiped at her eyes, chastising herself for forgetting to fix her makeup earlier. She ran over to the small kitchen mirror and gasped in horror at her reddened eyes and running mascara, fixing herself as best she could before returning to the door. Maybe it was better that way—for Quinn to see some visible evidence of how much she had hurt her before they talked everything out and made up. Was she even ready for that?

Another knock at the door yanked her out of her thoughts. She looked down at the floor as she rolled the door open.

"Rachel. Hey."

Rachel's head jerked up at the unexpected voice, and she stared ahead in shock.

"Finn!"

"Hey, Rach."

"Finn…what are you doing here?"

"I was on my way through New York, you know…like I told you I was going to be, and while I was here, I um…well, I wanted to apologize. For what I said on the phone."

"Oh."

"I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I'm sorry. I just…well I had no idea that you wanted to experiment with girls. That's cool though, I guess. Puck said girls like to do that in college. I'm just not sure Quinn is the one you want to do that with. I'm still worried you're going to get hurt…"

"Finn, I…wait, you talked to Puck?"

"Yeah, he was a little shocked, but it didn't seem to bother him too much. In fact, he said something about wanting to see you two soon…"

Rachel shook her head, hoping Puck wasn't going to show up at her door this weekend too. "Well, while I appreciate your concern, 'experimentation' is not exactly what's going on here. Like I said, we're dating."

"Dating… Like 'Brit-and-Santana' dating? For real?"

"Yes, Finn."

Finn looked puzzled as he scrunched up his cheeks. "Why?"

"Why? Because I'm attracted to her, Finn. She's sweet and loving and she really knows how to make me feel special, most of the time."

"Then why does it look like you've been crying?"

Did Finn really not notice until now, Rachel wondered?

"I'd rather not go into that. Don't worry. I'll be fine."

"Did she hurt you?"

"I hardly think that's any of your business anymore," Rachel retorted.

"Rachel, we may not be together right now, but you're still my friend. I care about you. If someone hurts you, it'll always be my business."

"I appreciate your sympathy, but there's nothing I want to talk about right now."

"I _know_ those tears, Rach," Finn continued. "This _must_ beabout Quinn. If she's upset you already…"

Rachel leaned her head against the door and closed her eyes. "Finn, don't… I appreciate you stopping by and apologizing to me. That means a lot, but right now I just want to be alone," Rachel lied. She really wanted to be with Quinn. "Please, just go," Rachel begged meekly, feeling worn out from the day.

Finn dropped his bag inside the door and pulled Rachel in to an awkward hug.

"No. Whatever happened, I'm not afraid to stand up to her for you, Rach. I warned you what kind of a person she is. She's no good for you."

"Finn, let me go," replied Rachel with quiet but stern determination in her voice.

"Not until you tell me what she's done to make you so upset," Finn countered.

"Finn, _please_ …"

"I think you should do as she says," commanded a familiar voice, startling them both. Rachel pushed out of Finn's hold on her.

"Quinn!" exclaimed Rachel. Quinn was standing at the door with arms folded across her chest and lips pursed, glaring straight at Finn.

"Didn't expect to see _you_ here so soon," Quinn seethed.

"Yeah, and I never expected to see _you_ trying to get with Rachel. Is this for real, Quinn? Are you _seriously_ interested in dating her? Or is this just some kind of twisted game you and Santana are playing at her expense? Because I–"

"You have _no_ idea what Rachel means to me, Finn Hudson. And I don't owe you _any_ explanation, so you can just butt the hell out."

"Well from what I can see, you've not even been dating her two weeks and she's already crying over something you've done. You're _already_ hurting her. It's what you're good at."

"Finn…" started Rachel, but Quinn moved in between them, getting in Finn's face.

"This is _none_ of your god damn business, Finn. So just _leave_!"

"Actually I think it kinda _is_. I think _maybe_ she'd rather be with someone who will treat her with respect. Not someone who's going to be a constant source of _abuse_."

"That's _enough_ , Finn," Rachel interjected.

Quinn raised her voice even louder and poked a finger into Finn's chest. "You know _nothing_ about abuse."

"Oh, and I suppose you do since it seems to run in your family. Like father, like daughter…"

Quinn reached up lightning quick and grabbed Finn by his ear.

"Ow…ow…ow…" cried Finn.

With a firm grip she began to twist. "Take that back, asshole," she growled as Finn yelped while he was pulled downwards.

"Quinn, that's enough!" yelled Rachel as she struggled to pull them apart.

Quinn let go of Finn but didn't back away.

"Finn, please leave," Rachel pleaded in a quiet but determined voice.

"And leave you alone with this psycho bitch?"

Quinn started to move towards Finn again, but Rachel silently grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"I don't need your protection," said Rachel. "I can take care of myself. It's time for you to leave."

"Rach…"

"Now!"

Finn looked at Rachel with hurt in his eyes, then turned to glare at Quinn before leaning down to pick up his bag off the floor. He pushed past Quinn and left the apartment in a huff.

Rachel closed the door and then leaned her head forward against it. "Fuck," she said quietly.

* * *

Silence enveloped the apartment for a few seconds before either of them spoke again.

Quinn stepped forward and put one hand tentatively on Rachel's shoulder. "Rachel..."

"You were supposed to wait until I called you," said Rachel softly, still leaning against the door.

"I decided I wasn't going to sit by my phone all night, crying like a basket case, waiting for your call. And plus, there's no way in hell I'm leaving New York as your ex-girlfriend. So, ready or not, you're just going to have to hear me out."

Rachel turned around and briefly looked into Quinn's eyes, which looked just as red as hers, before she looked back down at the floor. She nodded and smirked, appreciating Quinn's determination. And was that a flutter she felt in her heart from Quinn standing up to Finn so fiercely on her behalf?

She was ready. Rachel took Quinn's hand and led her over to the couch.

"So was _this_ why you didn't want me to come over?" asked Quinn. "Do I need to be worried?"

"No, _that_ ," Rachel motioned towards the door with her other hand, "was bad timing. I totally forgot he was going to be in town."

"Well, I guess I should be glad he was forgettable," joked Quinn quietly as they sat down together.

"Quinn, I'm so scared right now. I'm so scared about how hard I've fallen for you that I don't know if I can do this with you—I'm sorry, that probably doesn't make sense."

"It does."

"It's just—if you go back to New Haven and start falling for Hayley again, I—I don't know what I'd do if I actually lost you to her…"

"You're not going to lose me to anyone. Rachel, listen to me. I know it was an awful shock to hear about what happened between me and Hayley, not to mention how I kept the truth from you for so long."

"I guess it wasn't that long."

"Rachel! No…don't start making excuses for me. You were absolutely right. I can't filter the truth from you so you only hear what I want you to hear. That's not fair to you or to our relationship. Yes, I admit I was starting to have feelings for Hayley, but they were nothing but a placeholder for what I feel for you. I love _you_. And I _don't_ just mean while you're in town. I really don't care about the distance. It doesn't change the fact that you _complete_ me, Rach. No one else makes me feel that way."

"Quinn," Rachel gently squeezed Quinn's hands, "I—"

"No, let me finish," Quinn stopped her. "Look, I _know_ you have every reason to doubt me, every reason to feel uncertain whether or not I'm being completely honest with you. And I'm sorry, Rach, but I don't think there's anything I can say that will magically change that overnight. Ipromise you though, you'll feel it. I'll give you more than just words to go by for you to know how committed I am to this relationship. I would drop whatever I'm doing to put you first. I promise I'll be here for you anytime you need me. Every time I show up at your doorstep and jump into your arms, you'll know how much you mean to me. And when I introduce you from now on as my _girlfriend_ , you'll know how proud I am to be with you. Just give me a chance, Rach, to prove all this to you, and my word will eventually mean something to you again someday."

Rachel's lower lip quivered as she gently shook her head and looked into Quinn's eyes.

"You're already proving it to me, Quinn," cried Rachel.

She pulled Quinn in tightly and let the dam holding back all the pain and doubt she'd been bottling up burst forth as she clutched Quinn's side, sobbing into her shoulder.

Rachel lifted her head up after a little while, once her nerves began to calm down and the tears had subsided. "I'm sorry, I've made a mess of your jacket," Rachel chuckled apologetically as she looked down at Quinn's damp shoulder. "Take it off and stay awhile?"

"For a while, maybe longer, Rach," replied Quinn as she kissed Rachel's forehead.

Quinn shed her jacket and threw it on a nearby chair, then leaned her head back onto the armrest of the couch and pulled Rachel down with her. "I'm all yours," Quinn added.

Rachel tucked her face into the crook of Quinn's neck and smiled at the delicate scent of lavender and vanilla that only Quinn possessed.

She began to sing softly while stroking Quinn's arm.

" _I'm yours._

 _You're mine._

 _And I'll be by your side._

 _We are entwined._

 _Hold me until we die._

 _I'm yours and you are mine."_

"What's that from, little bear?" asked Quinn.

"Just something I've been working on while thinking of you," replied Rachel. "It still needs work, but you're inspiring me."

Quinn held Rachel closely, combing through her hair and writing love notes on her back with her fingers, while Rachel continued to hum into Quinn's chest. She let wave after wave of happiness wash over her, slowly erasing her fears and replacing them with love.

* * *

 **Song Credit** : _You're Mine_ , Lea Michele


	17. With Friends Like These

**Chapter 17 – With Friends Like These**

* * *

" _YES!_ " Rachel squealed in delight while rapidly pumping both hands in the air, being careful to hold on to the spatula. The pancake she had just flipped not only landed _on_ the griddle this time (mostly), but even had a uniform, appetizing shade of brown. Unlike the other one that had landed on the floor, and the blackened ones that had come before, _this_ one actually had a chance of being edible – assuming she could take it off before the other side burned, of course. She worried her lower lip over the small amount of remaining batter. Maybe it would be enough for the both of them if all the other pancakes turned out like this one. Hopefully Quinn wasn't _too_ hungry…

Really, this was a lot harder than her daddy had made it sound over the phone when she had called him this morning. She had considered scrapping the whole plan for Operation Breakfast in Bed and just running over to one of the breakfast diners down the street for takeout, but she didn't want to risk Quinn waking up to an empty apartment. Besides, the whole point was to show Quinn she was perfectly capable of providing for her house guests. After all, if she were ever able to convince Quinn to move to New York, she would want her to have every reason to come over and visit, often! She knew Quinn was just as happy spending a quiet evening at home as she was going out to eat. So backing down now would not help sell what Rachel had to offer.

 _What DO I have to offer her?_ The thought suddenly dropped into her consciousness. She froze for a moment, spatula in mid-air as her face crinkled in search of an answer. She had to admit she didn't fully understand Quinn's conviction. She shook the uneasy feeling away and returned her attention to the task at hand.

Satisfied with the progress of her breakfast-making skills for the moment, she hummed quietly to herself and tiptoed around the corner to peek through the privacy curtains and make sure Quinn was still sleeping. She smiled at the beautiful blonde body currently spread across her sheets, clutching her biggest pillow, and taking up most of the bed. She certainly did move around a lot at night! Thankfully, much of said movement involved draping her arm across Rachel and even spooning her at times. It was a wonderful feeling, having someone you're in love with snuggle up to you, smelling their sweet scent of…

 _Bacon!_ Oh god, the bacon! Rachel scurried back to the stove and grabbed the fork by the side of the stove. She desperately tried to lift and peel the pieces of bacon off of the griddle before they burned any more. Truth be told, it wasn't real, pork bacon, but it looked awfully close to her! She had found a vegetarian alternative in the nearby whole-foods market and, with a little oil and seasoning suggested by her dad, hoped it would at least make it palatable, if not delightful, to a bacon connoisseur such as Quinn. However, there was only one pan in the apartment suitable for cooking either bacon or pancakes, so she was cooking them both at the same time in the same pan and, given her limited skills in the kitchen, it was starting to become a cakey, oily mess.

Of course, just as she felt like she was getting things under control and had poured another pancake on the griddle, her phone rang. An unknown number! Curiosity always got the better of her in these situations. She quickly set the spatula down and answered it before it could ring again and wake her sleeping beauty.

"Hello?" Rachel asked.

"Hey, dwarf! How'd last night go?" replied the rude caller.

"Hello, Santana." Rachel chuckled. She was way too happy this morning to let Santana get under her skin. "How did you get my number?"

"I may have copied it off of Blondie's phone last night while she was balling her eyes out in my hotel room, just in case I needed to hunt you down and ends you," said Santana matter-of-factly. "She never came back last night. Did you two kiss and make up yet? Or am I going to have to go out and look for her wandering the streets somewhere?"

"She's here with me," Rachel replied, her heart instantly clenching at the thought of Quinn crying over how she had left her in the park last night, and the image of her wandering any streets alone at night. "Everything's fine," Rachel added.

Santana scoffed. "Bitch could have called me and told me that."

"It's sweet of you to care." Rachel smiled to herself at Santana's way of showing concern for her friend.

"Well, despite what people say, I do care about my friends," Santana replied.

"Thank you for consoling her," said Rachel. "Was she really that upset?" Rachel continued in a whisper, curious now and worried over how much hurt she had caused her girlfriend. She and Quinn had been so tired last night, they hadn't really talked about what each had gone through after leaving the park. They had ended up falling asleep in each other's arms on the couch as Rachel sang a few more songs to Quinn.

"I've _never_ seen Quinn that upset over _anyone_. Fucking balling her eyes out on my bed. She was convinced you were going to leave her."

"I wasn't!"

"Yeah, well…she really has a thing for you, Berry. I hope you realize how lucky you are."

"I do. I'm not really sure _why_ sometimes—"

"And how _stupid_ you are for wanting to get involved with such a trainwreck in the first place."

"She's not a _trainwreck_ , Santana. How can you say that?"

"Because I know her better than you? All I can say is, enjoy the ride and have fun getting your freak on with our queen bee for however long it lasts. But don't go expecting this to be some Disney-laden romance."

"Santana, I went to school with her too. I know what I'm getting in–"

"I'm not really sure you do, Rachel," interrupted Santana. Her tone was suddenly a little too serious for Rachel's liking. And was that the first time Santana ever called her by her first name? "But I _am_ sure that if you _ever_ break her like that again, I will not hesitate to drop by your little hobbit hole and return the favor myself."

"I–"

"Oh, and another thing. You two owe me a makeup lunch for ditching me last night."

Rachel sighed at the sudden barrage of threats and demands and decided to keep the rest of her thoughts to herself for another time. "Fine. Okay. We're obviously a little busy this afternoon, but when's the next time you'll be in New York?"

"No, Berry. You two are taking me out to lunch _today_ , before I catch my flight back to Loserville."

"But…Quinn and I already have plans for today."

"Yeah, you do, and they include picking me up in front of my hotel at noon. You _owe_ me. _Byeee!_ "

Santana hung up before Rachel could argue any further.

Rachel stood looking at the phone for a moment and scoffed. "And people complain _I'm_ bossy!"

"Who's bossy, baby?" inquired Quinn in a sleepy and huskier voice than Rachel was used to hearing.

Rachel gasped softly as she turned to find the most beautiful, barefoot vision trudging towards her. How she managed to pull off sexy in sleep-tousled curls, Rachel would never understand. With eyes half-open and rubbing them awake as Quinn yawned, Rachel thought it to be the most adorable sight she'd ever seen…that is, until her eyes dropped lower to toned white thighs below a long Yale t-shirt and nothing else. Arousal quickly pushed adorable overboard, and she found herself thinking of more pleasurable ideas than meeting Santana for lunch today…if only they could be guaranteed an apartment to themselves. She still hadn't heard back from Kurt on his plans for the day.

"Hi" was all she could manage as Quinn – _the_ Quinn Fabray, who was currently here in _her apartment_ – wrapped her arms around Rachel and planted a soft kiss on her lips.

"Hey good lookin', whatcha got cookin'?" Quinn asked cutely as she smiled and then looked over Rachel's shoulder. "Did you make _bacon_ for me?!" Quinn gasped in excitement, partially breaking the hug and turning her attention to the stove.

Still bewitched by the blonde standing so close, with one arm lingering over her shoulder, Rachel remained speechless as her eyes darted from the blonde's strong jawline and creamy smooth skin to her petite nose and wide hazel eyes. She was so done for…

"Bacon? Yes…I-I made bacon," Rachel stuttered. "And pancakes," she added.

"Umm, Rach-sweetie, I think this one's ready," said Quinn pointing to the pan.

"It is? Oh! Oh, dear! I'm sorry, this is all new to me. I-I'm still getting the timing down." Rachel turned off the stove and quickly shoveled and pried everything she could off of the hot griddle. "Sorry. These might be a little over done."

"Distracted, were we?" Quinn chuckled beside her as Rachel cursed and scraped the remaining contents onto the serving plate.

Rachel whimpered in defeat as she dropped the griddle back onto the stove with a clang and stared at the crusty pancakes and slightly blackened bacon pieces.

"I suck at this," cried Rachel as she dropped the spatula into the pan.

Quinn stepped up from behind and put her arms around the dejected brunette. "It's okay sweetie," she whispered softly into Rachel's ear, sending a shiver down the girl's spine. "I'm flattered you went to all this trouble for me," she added, nuzzling Rachel's ear with her nose. "It'll be fine."

The tension in Rachel's shoulders dropped a little as she relaxed into Quinn's hold. Quinn delicately nibbled around her ear, and Rachel moaned gently in response. Okay, this was something new! She was caught off guard once again. No one had ever sucked or nibbled on her ear before. Rachel's mouth dropped open, and she closed her eyes as the sensation gradually moved lower and turned into wet kisses on her neck. Her knees were starting to feel weak, and she was sure she would have collapsed on the spot if Quinn hadn't been holding her from behind.

"I'm sure it's delicious," purred Quinn against her moistened skin.

Rachel savored the sound of Quinn's words for a moment and then turned in her arms to face her, placing her arms around Quinn's neck and looking deeply into the blonde's eyes. "Are we still talking about breakfast?" she asked breathlessly.

Quinn smiled and drew her tongue around her own lips. "Not necessarily."

Rachel returned the sultry look directed at her with darkened eyes and lowered brows. For a few tantalizing heartbeats, they stared at each other before both leaning in and tilting their heads—in the same direction, unfortunately—smashing their noses together when they tried to reach each other's lips.

"Ow!" Rachel giggled, squinting her eyes while Quinn just grimaced and shook her head.

"Yeah, let's try that again," said Quinn, chuckling out loud herself.

Rachel reached up with her right hand to stroke through Quinn's hair and then pull her back at a more compatible angle to hers.

"Much better," said Quinn while pressed against Rachel's lips.

"Much," agreed Rachel, smiling back as they recaptured the moment.

Rachel's mouth opened against Quinn and their tongues touched and teased each other.

"I'm sorry if I fell asleep on you last night," panted Rachel when they both paused for lack of oxygen.

"It's okay. I was tired too," replied Quinn breathlessly, sucking in a lungful of air before capturing Rachel's lips again.

A few delicious minutes later Rachel interrupted again. "You know, I don't remember moving from the couch to the bed though, or…removing any clothes." Rachel tilted her head and quirked an eyebrow.

"I was the perfect, um, gentleman? Okay…later, we're going to find a better phrase for that. But right now you need to shut up and kiss me." Quinn smashed her lips to Rachel's a little harder than before, and Rachel was quickly lost in the intensity. Quinn's hands were roaming lower and lower while still holding Rachel tightly against her body.

Still, Rachel's mind wouldn't stop going over everything she could remember about last night, and she kept running into a dead end. She couldn't remember falling asleep, and she so desperately wanted to learn what had transpired so she could play it back later, perhaps fitting it into a fantasy or two when Quinn was gone.

"So, did _you_ remove my skirt or did I?"

"Rachel! Oh my god, I'm trying to defile you in your kitchen here!"

"Sorry, but I need details, Quinn."

"Right now?" Quinn sighed in exasperation. "Okay, you fell asleep while I was rubbing your back. I held you until my left arm started going numb. I carried you into bed, and yes, I removed your skirt and nothing else. I changed into my t-shirt and slid in next to you, and then I fell asleep till I woke up this morning – in a panic, mind you, when you weren't there and I didn't know where I was for a second. Are those enough details for you?"

"You carried me to bed?" asked Rachel, looking doe-eyed back at Quinn.

"I carried you to bed," confirmed Quinn, "and kissed you goodnight."

"I think I just fell deeper in love with you," whispered Rachel as she imagined what that would have looked like.

"So _that's_ what I felt just now." Quinn smiled.

Rachel pulled Quinn back into an even deeper kiss with refocused energy, continuing their passionate embrace, uninterrupted for even longer this time in front of their forgotten breakfast. Quinn's hands were now venturing out further, exploring Rachel's front and back side while pressing her up against the kitchen counter. A lid hit the floor, and Rachel felt the hem of her shirt lift up and soft hands slide up underneath. She moaned as Quinn, in one continuous motion, slid her hands up Rachel's bare back and then circled back around, down her side, stopping to grab the end of Rachel's shirt, lifting it up.

Rachel's eyes opened suddenly, and she broke their kiss just as her shirt was about to rise above her breasts. "Oh no you don't!" Rachel chuckled and playfully slapped Quinn's hands away. With a look of dismay forming on her lover's face, she intertwined their hands together at her side. "Kurt could walk in that door any second!"

"Fine with me. What better way to make sure he turns around and walks right back out…" husked Quinn while friskily trying to wrestle free of Rachel's grip, leaning in this time to claim Rachel's neck.

Rachel giggled as she took a step back from her affectionate girlfriend. "Down, tiger. We're not going any further right now. Besides, I have too many things planned for us today."

Quinn whimpered and tried to put on her best pout, but it had no effect on the brunette. Rachel closed the gap again and pressed her lips lightly against Quinn's once more before pulling back. "Eat some breakfast," she whispered. "You're going to need your energy tonight."

Quinn's eyes grew wide while Rachel smirked and then turned back around to pull a couple plates down from the cupboards. "Oh, and by the way, we're having lunch with Santana."

" _What?!_ " barked Quinn.

* * *

Their yellow cab rolled to a stop in front of Santana's hotel at ten minutes past twelve. Rachel texted Santana to let her know they'd arrived and then scooched across the cool black vinyl to get closer to Quinn, leaning in to her from the middle seat and nestling her head on her shoulder. It was a position that was rapidly becoming a favorite, giving her access to Quinn's neck and a soft spot from which to look up into Quinn's eyes and breathe in deeply the warm, vanilla scent from her neck. Rachel planted a long, wet kiss just under Quinn's ear and smiled at the moan she elicited.

"You're affectionate this morning," said Quinn in a soft voice meant only for Rachel.

"Too much?" whispered Rachel back to her.

"Never," replied Quinn. "I like this."

"Me too," Rachel nuzzled in agreement.

"Don't expect Santana to concur, however," added Quinn.

"I would never expect that." Rachel chuckled and reached over to Quinn's hands to draw circles on them. "In fact, she made that quite clear when she practically threatened my life if I were ever to hurt you again."

"She what?" Quinn laughed. "When?"

"This morning, on the phone" replied Rachel, looking up into Quinn's eyes. "I got the feeling she doesn't give our relationship much of a chance."

"Don't listen to Santana. You know how much she enjoys being a bitch, and that goes doubly so for anyone I'm dating. She's very protective." Quinn pulled Rachel close and kissed the top of her head. "Don't worry about her."

A few minutes later Santana climbed in the back with them and immediately scoffed at the affectionate couple beside her.

"Oh, sit up straight, dwarf. My stomach can't handle the sight of you two macking on each other before I've had a drink."

Rachel refused to acknowledge her presence, still feeling a little miffed over having their early afternoon plans ruined, and instead proceeded to give the address of the restaurant to the cabbie.

Quinn chuckled as she looked over at Santana behind Rachel's head. "Jealous?"

"Nauseous," quipped Santana. " _Rachel_ , Jesus, I can see the back of your thighs. Don't you own any longer skirts?"

"She does, but I don't see the problem," answered Quinn on Rachel's behalf. "Maybe you should stop staring at my girlfriend's ass."

"Uh!" Santana snorted. "Gross…"

Quinn smirked while Santana turned to look out her window. "So where are you taking me to lunch?" asked Santana a few blocks later.

"We thought we'd try this new place not far from here," replied Rachel. "It's called the Spotlight Diner. Apparently the wait staff sing and sometimes even dance for the customers. Doesn't that sound like the coolest waitressing job?"

"Oh, great…" Santana sighed. "Just when I thought I was over the horror of glee club you want to take me to a new one that comes with its own side of indigestion."

"Oh come on, Santana," countered Rachel as she sat up straight in full, upright debate position to confront Santana. "You _loved_ singing and dancing with us."

"I loved singing and dancing with _Brittany_ , not listening to your caterwauling," Santana retorted. "And I sure as hell wouldn't have stayed if I had been subjected to _this_ disgusting display of affection every day," continued Santana, grimacing while gesturing towards the couple.

Quinn made a show of kissing Rachel's neck in response, earning an instinctive moan from Rachel when Quinn reached a particularly pleasurable spot just behind her ear.

"Oh my _God_ , would you two stop already?!"

Rachel ignored the demand. "So how is Brittany anyway? How are you two doing?"

"Okay, first of all, hobbit…"

"Santana…" Quinn warned from behind Rachel after popping her lips off of the brunette's neck, which was now glistening wet from ear to collar bone.

"Fine… _Rachel, sweetie_ ," Santana corrected herself with a sardonic smile. "Don't think that just because you're hooking up with a member of the Unholy Trinity you are suddenly free to ask about my relationship with Brit-Brit. Secondly, and officially…she and I are on a mutually agreed break at the moment."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," replied Rachel with a frown.

"It's whatever." Santana sighed with a dismissive wave of her hand, trying to pretend like it was no big deal but failing miserably to convince anyone. "Anyway, I met this hot chica at the jazz bar last night, her name's Dani," continued Santana, her smile returning. "Quinn met her. Smoking hot, am I right?"

Santana look at Quinn for confirmation, but Quinn just pursed her lips and shrugged.

"Please," Santana scoffed in return. "You were _so_ checking her out when she first walked away from our table. Q here has a thing for legs, in case you didn't know."

Rachel raised her eyebrows and turned to Quinn, who was blushing by now.

"That's why Rachel's short skirts are just _fine_ with me, Santana. Now continue your lurid story."

"Good save, Q." Santana laughed, looking back to Rachel. "Anyway, so _after_ I kicked this sobbing hot mess here out of my room later last night–"

"Hey!" protested Quinn. "There was no kicking, and I had everything under control by then."

"Yeah, says the girl who never thanked me for fixing her face before she left to grovel for forgiveness," said Santana, leaning back to glare at Quinn.

Quinn just rolled her eyes again and Santana returned her attention once again to Rachel. "Anyway, I went back downstairs and grabbed a seat at the bar while I waited for her shift to end. And once it did, she invited me to a karaoke bar down the street."

"Karaoke!" Rachel whined with jealousy.

"Yeah, well, if you two hadn't been in the middle of your little lovers' quarrel, you could've joined us! Sucks to be you."

Rachel looked down at her lap and pouted.

"And let me tell you, that girl has some _serious_ pipes. Reminded me of you a little bit, Berry, except she actually got my lady parts humming."

Rachel looked back up at Santana and gave her a sideways glance while Santana just smirked back at her.

"So yeah, I'd have to say New York is treating me pretty well so far."

"What do you mean 'so far'?" Rachel probed. "You're leaving this afternoon, right?"

"Actually, I changed my flight so I could go out with her again tonight. And if she's as into me as I think she is, I plan to find out what other hidden talents she has, too," said Santana with an exaggerated waggle of her eyebrows.

"God Santana, you haven't changed one bit," replied Quinn.

* * *

"Oh. My. God! This place is perfect for Broadway!" exclaimed Rachel, wide-eyed and amazed as they walked into the diner and looked around. There were framed photos of famous actors along the wood-paneled walls. The outfits worn by the wait staff complemented the 60's era décor, giving the place a throwback vibe, while the occasional sections of brick brought out a distinctly New York feel.

The long windowed front of the restaurant let in an abundance of light that accentuated the bright red booths and stools and shiny metallic surfaces throughout the diner. Off to the left was a small stage with a skyline as a backdrop, which thrilled Rachel to no end, and up above was a small strip of brick-lined balcony seating circling the restaurant. The waitresses wore bright red, sleeveless mini dresses with large, white buttons all the way up the front, while the men behind the center bar were in white dress shirts, red suit coats, and black bow ties. They all looked like ushers out of an old Broadway theatre.

"Hello and welcome to Spotlight," greeted the hostess. "Table for three?"

"Yes, please!" replied Rachel cheerfully.

"Would the balcony be all right? Or do you want to wait for a booth on the main floor?" asked the hostess.

"Oh, the balcony is fine." Rachel answered for the three of them. That would give them a nice view of the place, Rachel thought, and give them a little more privacy for what she was sure was going to be a grilling about their relationship from Santana.

Once seated above the hustle and bustle below, Rachel perused her menu and was delighted to find half a dozen appealing vegan entrees. Santana ridiculed her when she took a photo of the menu, accusing her of becoming a "hipster foodie", but really she just wanted a photo she could send to the management of Breadstix back in Ohio. She thought someone should let them know that if they are going to advertise themselves as "vegan-friendly", as she had noticed during her last trip home, they really ought to offer more than a choice of two salads and a vegetable soup.

Quinn decided on a club sandwich, and Santana ordered last, choosing the chef salad and a wild berry margarita, while making a lascivious show of licking her lips to Quinn after she did.

"Oh, and bring two straws," said Santana to the waitress. "My friend here seems to like the taste of berry, too."

The waitress gave her a strange look and nodded as she left, while Rachel blushed quietly and Quinn rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"You're so immature," said Quinn once the waitress was out of earshot.

"Hey, I'm just thinking of you, Q," defended Santana, holding up both hands in a show of innocence.

Rachel chanced a glance up to Santana, who was still smirking, but then realized her mistake too late when Santana used the opportunity to continue.

"Oh, _I'm_ sorry Rachel," said Santana in a mock apologetic tone, "how rude of me not to request one for you too. I might have known you'd want a taste yourself–"

"That's _enough_ , Santana," hissed Quinn, keeping her voice low and glancing around at the few tables around them as she spoke.

Santana cackled out loud. "I'm sorry. This is just too magical a moment. Fucking Berry and Fabray, coupled together before me. I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it with my own eyes. I'm _so_ disappointed I didn't see this coming sooner."

"So am I," added Rachel.

"Mmhmm, I bet," smirked Santana as she fixed her gaze on Rachel.

It was always a little unnerving whenever Santana studied her like that. She had such a piercing gaze, Rachel felt like she was being undressed, judged, and then publicly mocked for all to witness. Maybe someday she would come to thank Santana for the composure under pressure it had helped her learn over the years. Maybe someday when she auditioned in front of famous directors and producers, her steely resolve would serve her well. For now, though, she just tried to prepare herself for whatever was to come next.

"So you two patched things up last night, huh?" started Santana.

"We did." Rachel nodded triumphantly. "We had a good talk. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship, and I think we demonstrated that quite well last night."

" _Really_? You just worked everything out in one night. Color me _impressed_ ," claimed Santana, with a little too much enthusiasm.

Quinn closed her eyes and shook her head lightly. "Santana, leave it alone."

"Well, my point was simply that we talked openly and honestly, and while there may be some things we still need to work through, we know what we mean to each other," explained Rachel, backtracking a little. "I'd say ending up falling asleep in each other's arms was a pretty good way to end an evening that had such a rocky start."

"Oh, totally," agreed Santana, though Rachel couldn't quite tell if she was being forthright yet. "I'm just surprised that you're okay with Quinn's little one-night stand. But hey, good for you!"

"Well, I have to admit, it did come as somewhat of a shock," replied Rachel.

"It did?" asked Quinn. "Why?"

"Because, Quinn, that one mistaken night with Puck aside, I didn't think you were open to casual sex," said Rachel. "I'm not morally opposed to it or anything. It just threw me for a loop."

"I think the last few weeks have proven there's a lot you two didn't know about me. And besides, people change, Rach. Maybe I'm a little more open to some things, now that I'm with the right gender," said Quinn suggestively to Rachel.

Santana smirked, looking pleased with herself. "Well, see, now you two have a whole lot more to talk about."

Quinn turned her attention sharply back to Santana. "We didn't need your help. And don't think I don't know what you're doing, S. You can stop playing instigator."

Santana smiled smugly, looking satisfied with herself.

The conversation shifted to the scene below them. They all took turns picking out couples in the diner and acting out what they could be saying to each other. Quinn and Santana had Rachel cackling at their mimicry of one particular conservative-looking, thirty-something couple who appeared to be quietly arguing with each other.

"No, John, I will _not_ have butt sex with you. I don't _care_ what fantasy porn you masturbated to last night."

"Gosh Betty, it looked like fun. Why won't you do anything besides missionary with me?"

"My ass is too tight, John."

They continued their game, picking on couples young and old, until their waitress returned with their drinks and set them down before them. Santana took a sip and then returned her attention back to Rachel and Quinn.

"So, Berry, Quinn here tells me she's had the hots for you since…when did you say, Q? Puberty?"

"Ninth grade." Quinn sighed.

" _Ninth grade_ …" repeated Santana. "Damn! That's some serious pining. Don't know how you held it back so long." Santana paused to take another sip. "And what about you, Berry? When did you realize you wanted to get all up under Blondie's skirt?"

"Well, I think I've always had an eye for her. I've always felt myself drawn to Quinn. I just didn't really know what it meant until last summer."

"Hmm. You two did seem to hang out a lot by her pool," said Santana, nodding in agreement with Rachel. "Suddenly that all makes sense. I bet Q was wishing she could have peeled off that little bikini of yours and taken you right there in her own backyard."

"You'll never know what I was thinking, S," Quinn retorted with a quick twitch of her eyebrow that Rachel almost missed.

Rachel's heart skipped a beat when she felt Quinn's hand intertwine with hers under the table and made a mental note to ask Quinn about those thoughts later.

"Besides," added Rachel with what came out sounding like a nervous laugh, "Kurt or Mercedes were usually hanging around. It would have been highly inadvisable for her to express such amorous desires, o-or make any untoward advances in their company. We were hardly ever alone."

Rachel watched Santana's smirk silently grow and panicked a little inside trying to figure out what she had said to draw that reaction.

"You know, hobbit, you get awfully wordy when you're nervous," observed Santana.

"I'm not nervous," denied Rachel, her eyes darting from Quinn to Santana.

"What's it going to be like when you meet Q's parents?" asked Santana.

"Santana, don't…" warned Quinn.

"I've met them," replied Rachel.

"Not as a couple you haven't," countered Santana.

"We don't need to spend any time with my parents until we're ready," said Quinn. "Besides, my dad isn't really around much any more since their separation. Most likely he's off screwing his latest secretary."

"Ah, the Fabray family," mocked Santana, "It's everything you look for in an uptight, wealthy dynasty and more."

"I certainly don't need their acceptance or approval, if that's what you're getting at, Santana," assured Rachel, hoping to assuage Quinn's fears at the same time. She knew this would be a difficult topic for Quinn and she didn't want her needlessly worrying about defending her to a family who she really didn't expect to gain approval from in the first place. She just hoped Quinn could deal with the aftermath.

"Oh, don't worry. There's no chance of _ever_ getting their approval," said Santana with a wicked laugh.

"Santana…" said Quinn a little more sternly this time.

"Can you imagine what a holiday dinner would be like with them? Let alone a gay _wedding_."

"SHUT the fuck up, Santana," barked Quinn, slamming an open hand on the table and making Rachel jump.

"Oh calm your tits, Q. I just want to know if Berry here has any sense of what she's getting into dating a Fabray girl. God knows the condescending looks and snide comments Britt and I had to endure when we showed an _ounce_ of affection for each other around your parents. If Rachel can't handle the pressure and decides to run the moment they call her a degenerate whore for turning their _slut_ daughter gay–"

In one lightning quick motion, Quinn let go of Rachel's hand and made a connection across Santana's face with an open palm. Santana yelped while Rachel jumped in shock, letting out a surprised squeak at the same time. Her eyes shot back and forth between Quinn and Santana as she sat frozen in disbelief over what just happened. Santana's mouth was open, but she said not a word. She remained motionless for a moment, still looking in the direction she'd been so forcefully turned, before she blinked once and slowly turned back towards Quinn. Her cool composure showed defiance, but the glistening in her eyes betrayed her pain.

"And let's not forget the Fabray recourse to violence," said Santana cooly, holding Quinn's furious glare. "Best look out for that too, Rachel."

Rachel watched with quiet sympathy as Santana calmly stood from their table and walked towards the bathroom, drawing a few hushed stares from the scattered tables nearby.

"Was that really necessary?" hissed Rachel, jerking her head back to Quinn once the bathroom door had closed.

"She crossed the line," replied Quinn, her jaw still clenched in anger. "And she damn well knows it or she would have slapped me back."

"Be that as it may, you didn't need to physically strike back. You're a better person than that, Quinn."

Quinn let out some of the tension she'd been holding and looked over at Rachel. "I snapped, all right?"

"I know," answered Rachel softly. "It's not the first time I've been witness to that," she added, recalling the sting from Quinn's hand herself, years ago.

Quinn's lips were tight as she turned away from Rachel. Rachel fell silent and just watched her girlfriend, pouting in sympathy when she noticed Quinn rapidly blinking away the wetness forming in her eyes.

"Maybe, in her own way, Santana was just being very protective," suggested Rachel, echoing what Quinn had said to her earlier in the car.

"She didn't need to paint the scene quite so vividly."

Rachel nodded and decided to give Quinn a moment to herself, but not without pulling Quinn's hand over to her lap and rubbing calming circles with her thumb.

Quinn sighed but remained quiet while Rachel began to worry her lip and fidget in her seat, unable to stop thinking about her other friend in the bathroom.

"Are you going in there or am I?" asked Rachel.

"This isn't high school, Rachel. I'll apologize when she comes back," replied Quinn.

On the contrary, Rachel thought, the drama felt all too much like high school – something she had thought she'd left behind in Ohio.

Some things never change.

"Fine," said Rachel as she got up from the table anyway. Aggressor or not, it wasn't in her nature to just let someone walk away hurt and not go console them.

Rachel found Santana in front of the mirror in the bathroom, dabbing at her reddened cheek. She could see Santana make brief eye contact through the mirror but the Latina said nothing and returned to what she was doing.

Rachel walked up to her and placed a hand tenderly on the back of Santana's arm. "Are you okay?"

Santana continued to apply concealer. "Stings pretty good, but my pride's still intact. Maybe it'll be worth some sympathy points later today."

"I'm sorry, San–"

"Don't start apologizing for her, Rachel," said Santana as she whipped her head to face the brunette. Rachel grimaced slightly at the mark Quinn had left behind that was still partially visible. "We can handle our own battles."

"I'm just sorry you continue to have them," replied Rachel, sliding her hand up to Santana's shoulder. "Hug?" inquired Rachel.

Santana looked like she was considering the offer for a moment but then declined and returned her attention to the mirror. "I'll be fine," said Santana quietly. "Bitch always was a genius slapper."

Rachel dropped her hand and leaned back against the sink next to Santana.

"Look, I'm sorry I crossed the line while provoking your girlfriend," said Santana when she spoke up again. "I wasn't actually calling you a whore or Quinn a slut; I was just looking out for my best friend."

Rachel nodded quietly, running her hands over the fabric of her skirt while she looked down at the tiled floor.

Santana stopped her work and turned to face Rachel directly before continuing.

"I love Quinn too much to see her get hurt by a naïve little girl who thinks she's all head-over-heels in love, but really doesn't know shit about Quinn's family or the hell that will rain down when they find out their daughter's a fucking lesbo, and then leaves her, when Quinn needs her most, when the girl realizes what a mess she's gotten herself into."

"I'm not going to leave her when things get hard, Santana," countered Rachel. "Wasn't last night any indication to you of that?"

"Last night was _nothing_ ," Santana dismissed. "It was the tip of the iceberg for you and your fucked up lady love. Quinn is a sweet friend when she wants to be, but she comes with queen-sized baggage for anyone loco enough to date her."

"You act like I don't know that already," protested Rachel.

"Do you, though? Do you really know her, Rachel? Quinn's the most emotionally repressed, fucked up, unstable bitch I know. So I hope to God, for Quinn's sake and yours, that you know what you're getting yourself into."

* * *

 **A/N: Hi everyone! Thanks for your patience with my updates. And a HUGE thanks once again to my amazing beta, Relina. SUCH a smartie. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you haven't already, I would love it if you dropped me a line and let me know what you think of this story so far. Loving it more and more? Less and less? Have any predictions for what's in store for this couple? I'd love to hear it! Thank you all for reading this far!**


	18. Recovering

**Chapter 18 – Recovering**

Rachel stood outside the bathroom door and leaned back against the wall next to it. She closed her eyes and inhaled a deep, cleansing breath. After Quinn's outburst and Santana's diatribe, her nerves were frazzled and all she wanted now was a nice, hot, quiet bath to herself. But first, she had to make sure the two former Cheerios didn't kill each other before lunch was over. Making it out in one piece was a good goal, she thought – something to strive for. She took one more deep, diaphragmatic breath as she ran both hands through her hair, then let it out with a sigh. Pulse rate lowered and thoughts collected, she stood up straight and walked, poised and stoic, back to their table – back to her Quinn – while the Latina's words still echoed through her head.

 _The most emotionally repressed, unstable bitch I know._

 _Last night was nothing, Rachel!_

These ominous words didn't sit well with her, twisting her stomach back into a tight knot, but she forced herself to set aside these worries for later. Right now she felt the need to mentally prepare herself to act as referee for what would probably be an awkward remainder of their lunch. Normally one of them would have stormed out of glee or slammed a locker in the other's face by now and strode away, but she had a feeling that nothing like that would be happening today. Santana did not sound like she was going to let this go. No. This could get ugly. _This might even be the first restaurant in New York that I get kicked out of_ , thought Rachel!

Rachel found Quinn sitting quietly at their table in her perfect Fabray posture, glaring at the now-empty margarita glass in front of her and twirling its mangled straw. _Shit_ , sighed Rachel to herself as she surveyed the blonde brooding before her, jaw clenched and body tensed as if ready to lash out at the next person foolish enough to bring up the demons she left behind in Ohio.

With deliberate sensitivity, Rachel carefully sat back down next to Quinn, nervous about the kind of attitude she'd receive.

"Hey," offered Rachel gently.

"Hey," replied Quinn in a softer voice than Rachel expected. She flashed Rachel a quick smile before returning her attention to her glass, perhaps slightly less tense than a moment ago.

Rachel was dying to know what was going through Quinn's head, but she wasn't sure where to begin. Was coming out to family now a taboo subject for the rest of today? Could they talk about the upcoming holidays? What about Quinn's use of violence towards her best friend, less than a day after taking down Finn by his ear? Before she could decide on her approach, their waitress appeared and asked if she could get anything else for them.

"No, thanks," replied Rachel, wanting to get rid of her, "I think we're f–"

"I'd like your house margarita," interrupted Quinn with calm precision. "And two shots of your top shelf tequila."

"Certainly," acknowledged the waitress. "And for your other friend? Will she be returning?"

"One of those is for her," Quinn answered dismissively.

"Of course," said the waitress, "I'll be right back with your drinks, then."

Silence returned to the table once again and Rachel was torn. Quinn was now staring off into space at the artwork on the wall. She wanted to give Quinn some time, and not force her to talk before she was ready, but Santana would be returning soon and she wanted to know where Quinn stood on what had just happened so she could be prepared – maybe even a step ahead of the conversation this time.

Rachel pivoted towards her girlfriend and gently cleared her throat, hoping to nudge Quinn's mind back to the table from wherever it had gone. When that failed to get her attention, she quietly slipped one hand under the table and found Quinn's hands balled together in her lap. She eased them apart and, feeling no resistance, gently turned one palm up, and began to tenderly stroke the length of Quinn's long fingers back and forth.

Quinn closed her eyes and sighed softly, finally appearing to let go some of her tension, which elicited a hopeful smile from Rachel.

Rachel bit her lower lip and pressed on with her ministrations, making slow circles with her fingertips across the contours of Quinn's outstretched hand. Quinn leisurely opened her eyes and looked down at their two hands, watching for a moment. A half-smile crept up Quinn's face and then the blonde stopped the motion completely by entwining their fingers together, giving Rachel's hands a slight squeeze once they were fully captured. Misty, forlorn eyes finally looked up and held Rachel's gaze.

"Quinn, I–"

"Rachel–", Quinn tried at the same time.

A smile twinkled across Rachel's face and she waited for Quinn to begin again.

"Rach…look, I'm _sorry_ ," Quinn stressed. "I'm sorry I ruined lunch. And I'm sorry you had to see…all of that."

Rachel nodded and looked down at their joined hands, noting for a moment how nice it felt to hold them in public, even if it was under the table. Somehow it made Quinn's apology even more meaningful, and it was nice to know, at least, that Quinn didn't seem like a lit stick of dynamite, ready to blow again.

"Thank you, Quinn," Rachel replied as she looked up again at her girlfriend. "But I think the person to whom you need to apologize the most is still in the bathroom applying concealer to the nasty bruise you left behind."

Quinn responded with only a slight nod and pursed lips and Rachel immediately winced at the imprudent bluntness that had just escaped her mouth. She couldn't help it sometimes. How else was she going to be honest with people about what was on her mind, without including important details of whatever she saw or felt? She just hoped that this time, it wouldn't reverse course on the progress she had just made with Quinn and shut her down completely behind one of her infamous walls.

Thankfully, Quinn seemed to be taking it in stride so far. A few nervous heartbeats later, Quinn continued. "What did she say to you?"

"Well, she knows she crossed the line," offered Rachel, "and she admits she provoked you." Rachel paused for a moment and then, to help convey her disapproval, took their clasped hands and gently tapped them where they had been resting on Quinn's thigh. " _Not_ that I think it condones what you did."

Quinn grumbled in response.

"The truth is…I think what's really bugging her is that she's afraid I'm going to let you down when you need me most."

Quinn frowned and lightly shook her head.

"She thinks I'm, and I quote, a _naïve_ little girl who doesn't know _who_ she's getting involved with, or _what_ awful things your family is going to say to us – and that I'm just going to panic and leave you as soon as things get hard."

Quinn snorted. " _When_ they get hard?"

"Truth be told," Rachel whispered as she leaned closer, "I think she just doesn't believe I'm good enough for you."

Quinn rolled her eyes and sighed. "Don't listen to her, Rach."

"I'm not," said Rachel, "I'm used to it."

Rachel flashed back to past tirades from Santana in high school: during glee club, in hallways, back stage. Any time Santana spoke to her in that certain, familiar tone – laden with insults about Rachel's voice, stature, clothing, or physical attributes – it was like her skin suddenly thickened into a tough coat of armor.

Rachel returned her thoughts to Quinn and the ugly family scene Santana had just painted for them. Her heart ached at the cruelty and all she could think of was standing up for her girlfriend. "I'm _not_ going to leave you, you know. I don't care what they say. I've heard it all before. They're not going to scare me away."

"That's right, because you won't be there to hear it," Quinn replied adamantly.

"What?" Rachel asked, taken aback by the sudden exclusion, "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that when I tell my parents – or my mom, anyway – I don't think you should be there. It's going to get ugly."

Rachel pouted in her seat, feeling a little hurt by the exclusion.

"I don't mean any offense, Rach," continued Quinn, "I just don't want to subject you to her snide comments or her condemnation of 'the gays', and all the bullshit religious backlash that comes with it."

" _Quinn_ , I…while I will respect your wishes," assured Rachel, "I was kind of hoping we could be there for _each other_ when we tell our parents. I know my fathers will be…well, they'll be full of questions, that's for sure. And I'm actually really excited to introduce you to them."

Quinn raised her eyebrows in response.

"They're going to _love_ you, I promise," assured Rachel. "But as for your mom, I _want_ to be by your side when you tell her. I _want_ to stand up for you, for _us_. I don't care what she says or thinks or does. I've heard it all before, when it's been directed towards my fathers. Just… _please_ let me do that for you. For us?"

"Rach, you don't know my parents."

"Then shouldn't I?" pleaded Rachel.

Quinn opened her mouth, like she wanted to respond, but hesitated and sighed instead.

At that moment, their waitress returned with a tray of drinks and set them down in the middle of the table, shutting down any further discussion for now. Quinn pulled the margarita and one of the shots towards her and pushed the other towards Santana's side.

The waitress turned and stepped aside just in time to avoid colliding with Santana, who was approaching at full stride. With a heavy sigh Santana threw her purse on the seat next to her and plopped down with a grunt and a flick of her hair.

Santana set her eyes on Quinn and Quinn did the same. Neither spoke for several tense seconds while Rachel anxiously watched and waited.

"Bitch," Santana finally addressed Quinn.

Quinn scowled but said nothing in response.

"This for me?" she asked, reaching out to the full shot glass in front of her.

"It is," Quinn replied.

Santana threw back the tequila and let it hit the table hard. "You left a mark this time."

"Meant to," Quinn returned, pursing her lips and holding Santana's glare.

"Bet it doesn't sting as much as my slap of reality," said Santana, unphased by Quinn's hostile tone.

"I'll be fine, fuck you very much, but thanks for your concern," replied Quinn, sarcasm dripping from the tongue that wetted her lips.

"You guys!" Rachel pleaded before turning towards Quinn. "Quinn, this is not apologizing!"

"You're right," said Quinn with a quick look to her girlfriend before leaning in closer to Santana for effect and speaking more slowly. "I'm sorry, Santana, that you can't move as quickly as you used to. It must suck for your teammates underneath you."

Rachel gawked at the insult and false apology, wondering if Santana was on the verge of slapping Quinn now, while the two continued to stare each other down. _So much for staying a step ahead of the conversation!_ She suddenly felt the need to intervene. Rachel stood up in a huff and was about to put her foot down, literally stomp it down for dramatic effect, when the tension suddenly shattered before her eyes with a simultaneous burst of laughter from the two of them, who were still staring at each other.

Rachel stared back in confusion between the two former Cheerios, her mouth agape in disbelief, until the laughter died down. "I don't understand you two sometimes," sighed Rachel, plopping back down into her seat.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," Quinn said while lovingly rubbing Rachel's arm, still chuckling. "It's just a thing we do. The greater the tension…"

"The more satisfying the release," Santana finished with a wink. "I'd already forgiven her when I sat down. If I were really pissed, I wouldn't have come back."

"And lately she seems to enjoy setting me off," said Quinn, scrunching her eyes with a side glance to Santana.

"Hell yeah," agreed Santana, "except when you make contact," she added, gingerly dabbing around the area where she'd been hit.

"Sorry," Quinn winced, biting her lower lip.

"Your family really has you on edge lately, Q. You want to talk about it?" Santana asked.

"I think we've covered that one enough today," Quinn grumbled. "But speaking of getting on my nerves, guess which asshole was in Rachel's apartment last night?"

Rachel sighed. "Technically I hadn't invited him _in_ my apartment yet," Rachel clarified.

"No _wayyyy_!" Santana balked, "Tell me it wasn't Finncompetent."

"The same," Quinn confirmed, and then flipped back to Rachel. "And what do you mean 'yet'? Were you seriously considering the possibility of inviting him in with everything that was going on last night?"

"I-I don't know," Rachel stammered. "It's not out of the realm of possibility. I mean, it's not often that our former classmates–"

"Ex's!" Quinn interjected.

"– _friends_ ," Rachel clarified, "are in town. He came to see me to apologize for his behavior last week on the phone, and yes," Rachel defended, "I considered inviting him in – as a friendly courtesy – but it soon became clear that he was still not very accepting of our new relationship, and he was starting to jump to conclusions about your motives, Quinn. He was convinced that you were just going to hurt me again, and I didn't want to hear it. So I asked him to leave, but he wouldn't."

At that, Quinn frowned and looked a little worried, which left Rachel confused for a moment. She wasn't sure what she had said that would lead to this sort of reaction. _Unless… wait, is Quinn jealous of…_ she paused to think and then realized what a stupid question that would be. Of _course_ Quinn would have a history of jealousy of Finn! By Quinn's own recent admission, she'd been interested in Rachel the whole time that Rachel and Finn were dating in high school. _Poor Quinn_ , she thought. She made a mental note to give Quinn a little extra confidence boost the next time Finn was around.

" _That's_ about the time I showed up," Quinn jumped in. "The Neanderthal had his arms around her, claiming he would protect her from big bad old me, and wouldn't let her go even when she pleaded with him to stop. Then he actually had the nerve to accuse _me_ of not treating her with respect! Asshole."

"So you jumped in between to save the day?" asked Santana.

"Yes, because he got in my face and accused me of abusing Rachel…and then made the fatal mistake of saying I was just like Russell."

"Oh! Shit, he didn't!" exclaimed Santana, putting both hands to her mouth in horror as she leaned away from the table. "What a moron! Okay, so where are they going to find the body? Alleyway dumpster or Hudson river? Actually, the second choice makes so much sense, you know?"

"You're right. It does," Quinn nodded in agreement.

"Don't be morbid, you guys," Rachel scolded with a mild look of disgust on her face. "Though I'm not sure I follow. Why do I feel like there's something I'm unaware of in the comparison between you and your father?" Rachel asked of Quinn. "I mean I get that his behavior has been awful at times, but…"

"Have you never told her, Q?" Santana asked, putting her elbows back on the table and raising her eyebrows.

"There's never been a time or place when I've wanted to bring it up. He's no longer living with my mom and it would be fine by me if I never saw him again – ever. Can we talk about something else, please?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"You can't not tell her now though," said Santana. "Don't you think she should know, just in case?"

Quinn glared at Santana in response.

"Tell me what?" Rachel piped in.

"Oh, this has become a _fabulous_ weekend of Quinn tells all, hasn't it…" said Quinn sarcastically, throwing her hands up in the air.

Rachel looked on intently, wondering what landmine she had stumbled upon. When Quinn didn't offer any immediate explanation, Rachel looked over to Santana.

"Do you want me to explain it to her?" asked Santana.

"No," Quinn replied immediately, shaking her head vigorously from side to side.

Rachel thought for a moment that she was going to remain in the dark, but Quinn finally broke her silence on the subject.

"It's…not going to be a problem anymore. My father just has a history of lashing out at me when he's angry, particularly when he's been drinking."

"Lashing out…as in yelling at you?" Rachel hoped.

Quinn looked down at her lap this time when she shook her head. "No, hitting me."

"Quinn, sweetheart…" Rachel looked on in anguished shock. "I didn't know. Oh my god, I'm _so_ sorry."

"I wasn't purposely keeping it from you, Rach," Quinn sniffed as she looked up and made eye contact. "It's just not something I usually want to talk about, you know?"

"Of course. I-I completely understand. Oh my god, I can't even…" Rachel placed a hand over her mouth, not sure what else to say. It explained so much, yet raised so many more questions – one of which she felt compelled to ask while it was still relevant. "Does Finn know?"

Quinn puffed out a disgusted laugh. "Yes," she nodded, "Yes, he does."

Rachel deflated. "I'm sorry, Quinn." That was a low blow for him to use that against her. She would have to speak to him.

"How poetic that the very next day, I go and hit my best friend," Quinn frowned. "I'm sorry, San."

"Don't worry. I won't let you forget it," Santana chuckled for a moment, until her smirk soon faded and she took on a quieter voice of concern. "But uh, listen Q-ball…we've talked about this before and we agreed that you've got to start dealing with this a little better. You can't keep stuffing this cork back in the bottle and expect it never to blow up in your face again."

"I'm dealing, okay?" Quinn countered, "I'm moving on and I'm dealing with it."

"I don't think what happened a few minutes ago is anything like what I would call 'dealing with it'," said Santana.

Quinn only shrugged in response, which obviously wasn't good enough for Santana.

"What if next time it's Rachel on the receiving end of that slap? Oh, wait…my bad," Santana broke into a sinister chuckle, "she's already had that honor."

"That was a _long_ time ago, Santana," Quinn seethed. "There's no way I would _ever_ hit Rachel again. I am _not_ my father!"

"Oh, so you just save it for your best friend now…" Santana jeered.

"Stop fighting!" Rachel intervened. "You two are like cats in heat!"

"Well, the hobbit finally speaks some truth," affirmed Santana. "Can't argue with that."

Rachel rolled her eyes and ignored the familiar name-calling. "It's only been a few months since Quinn has been away from Ohio. Surely you can't expect someone to recover from childhood trauma in that amount of time," Rachel suggested. "If Quinn says she's dealing with it, then I believe her." Rachel had to ignore the nagging little voice inside her that _didn't_ quite believe that and continued on. "So, let's help her. She's got my shoulder to cry on, and I know a very good therapist who might really help, too."

"Thanks, but I'm not going to drag a therapist through my life story just for them to tell me I have anger management issues or whatever."

"Quinn, that's not–" Rachel began with gentle encouragement.

"Fine," Santana interrupted, talking over Rachel, "Just pull your shit together and learn how to deal, before you really hurt someone."

* * *

For the remainder of lunch, they managed to stick to lighter conversation about school, New York, friends back in Ohio, and the mutual fear of a waggily-eyed Puck showing up at their door wanting to play voyeur to some 'girl-on-girl action'. Quinn and Rachel argued over how to split the bill, which Santana gladly stayed out of on account of it being their treat as payback for last night. Once they were ready to leave, Santana mentioned wanting to get some photos, so Quinn excused herself to fix her face while the other two grabbed a seat on one of the wooden benches near the entrance to the restaurant.

An easy smile was returning to Rachel's face now, and she wanted to make sure Santana was feeling better too. While she was kind of glad they were finally about to get rid of Santana, she didn't want their friend to leave on bad terms. "It's kind of nice, don't you think, the three of us getting together outside of Ohio in the Big Apple?"

Santana flopped her head to the side in response, staring at Rachel as if she could not believe the stupidity she had just heard.

"I'm just trying to look on the bright side," Rachel quickly explained.

"Are you serious? Berry, the three of us barely made it through lunch without one of us getting arrested for assault."

"Now whose fault is that?" Rachel challenged.

Santana rolled her eyes, pulled a compact mirror out from her purse, and began checking her makeup again. She always seemed to carry herself with a sense of pride and strength about her, Rachel observed as she studied the woman next to her. No matter what storm was brewing in her midst, she remained so poised and confident. Sitting here now, reapplying a touch of concealer here and there, it reminded Rachel of a solitary tigress, licking its battle wounds and yet toughening itself for its next attack. It was then that a thought suddenly occurred to Rachel.

"You provoked her in front of me on purpose, didn't you," Rachel accused her friend sitting next to her.

Santana stopped for a moment and smirked. "Maybe," she said and continued her work, putting down the pad and pulling out a clear lip gloss.

"Santana, look, I may not know all the details behind her family history, but I know who I'm getting involved with. I know she's been hurting inside for a long time. So you don't need to drag the pain out of her and put it on display like that. That's just…cruel and sadistic."

"And _I_ maintain that you still don't know shit about Quinn. She needs help. She hasn't admitted it yet, but she really, _really_ needs it. There's a lot she has balled up inside, burning a hole in her stomach. And with her coming out like this and now facing the reality of having to tell her family?" Santana shook her head for a moment and held up one hand. "Hey, if you can help her, then fine…use your freak-like appeal to her and help her. Just – I'm warning you, don't fucking plus-one her problems, or so help me god…"

"You should know by now how committed I am to a relationship," Rachel asserted. "Overcommitted, I've been told in the past. I'm actually more worried about smothering her and scaring her away, but I am _not_ going to ignore her needs."

Santana harrumphed a little and began itching her nose. "Ow, fuck!" Santana exclaimed, wincing as she gingerly pinched her nostrils together. "Bitch scratched the inside of my nose, too!" Santana sniffed loudly a few times. "Ow, fucking hell! I hope she has my snot germs under her fingernails…you can remember that later when she's grinding her frustrations out on you."

Rachel blushed and retreated her gaze down towards her lap. 'Grinding' was a word that had suddenly gained new meaning to her after some recent Google searches. A smile crept up her face as her mind wandered, landing in her bedroom and lying on her back, locked eyes with a _very_ focused, intense blonde cheerleader standing between her legs, staring fiercely back at her, jaw clenched and mouth open just enough to lick her lips. She imagined the feel of Quinn rubbing up against her, catching glimpses of red and white fabric dancing between her legs, brushing against her opened thighs as Quinn rhythmically pressed into her. _Faster, baby._ She pleaded. _Faster!_

Rachel gasped as she snapped back to reality. Her feet jerked involuntarily underneath the bench as a jolt of pleasure shot through her legs. She crossed her hands in her lap and quietly blushed a deeper shade of red when she heard Santana snicker beside her. God she needed to be alone with Quinn and explore these erotic desires!

As if on cue, that sensuous, throaty voice that had just been dominating her fantasies piped up as Quinn approached the bench where they were sitting, Rachel's nerves still twitching from her daydream.

"Why is my girlfriend blushing like a cherry, Santana?" rumbled Quinn, hands now on her hips.

"Fuck if I know!" replied Santana, "Nor do I really want to! I've just been sitting here minding my own business, tending to my wounds."

Rachel harrumphed in return while Quinn squinted at Santana and shook her head in mild disbelief, obviously not buying the denial of involvement for a second.

"Mmhmm. Well, I think Rachel and I have afternoon plans that we really must begin." Quinn held out her hand for Rachel to take. "Shall we?"

"Ah ahh! Not before I get photographic evidence of this demon-spawned love fest," demanded Santana. "No one is going to believe it otherwise."

Rachel rolled her eyes at Santana but smiled as she took Quinn's hand and sprung to her feet, desperate now to be as physically close to her girlfriend as possible.

Quinn used the enthusiastic brunette's momentum to her advantage and pulled her in tightly, putting one arm around Rachel's waist, while Rachel did the same and then rested her head on Quinn's shoulder. They both turned their heads at the same moment and looked into each other's eyes, instantly smiling at the visual contact.

"Aww, cute," said Santana as she took the first picture. "Now Q, pretend like you actually like her and kiss the troll so I can be on my merry way and you two can…go mate under a bridge or whatever."

Rachel turned towards Santana and scoffed.

"Right here?" asked Quinn, lifting an eyebrow and looking around.

"Would you rather we go outside and get trampled on the sidewalk by angry New Yorkers?" Santana shot back, looking up from the phone. " _Yes_ , right here. Come on, kiss!"

Rachel bit her lower lip at their exchange and turned to Quinn, searching her eyes for any sign of discomfort. "Baby, we don't have to. If you're uncomfort– _mm_!"

In one sweeping motion, Quinn caught Rachel off guard, pulling her in by her waist with one hand, threading her other hand through Rachel's hair to hold her head still while she planted a full kiss on her lips.

"I'm actually fine with it, Rach," Quinn finally smiled in a whisper against Rachel's lips when she pulled away, mischievous eyes locking with the stunned gaze of her captured prey. Quinn kissed her again, tenderly brushing her lips across Rachel's.

Rachel closed her eyes and felt her heart racing a million miles per hour, threatening to beat out of her chest.

"Yes! Got it!" Santana shouted, pumping her fist.

* * *

Outside, they all agreed it was a good place to eat. Rachel was sad no one sang while they were there, but Santana thanked god they hadn't.

"So," said Santana, glancing around the busy street, presumably for the nearest taxi, "you both going back to Ohio for Thanksgiving?"

"I guess so," Quinn shrugged.

"Of course!" Rachel said. "I wouldn't miss Thanksgiving dinner for the world! It's a huge tradition in my family."

"That sounds like fun," Santana chuckled and playfully punched Quinn's arm. "You oughta go to Berry's house and join in on the festivities, Q."

"Oh my god, yes! Dad and Daddy would _love_ to have you over!" Rachel squealed as she bounced in place and clapped her hands, while Quinn just glared at Santana.

" _Anyway_ ," Santana continued, "I was thinking we should get the glee club together and all go out to dinner sometime that week. What do you think? You in?"

"I don't know, Santana…" Quinn equivocated.

"Come on!" Santana pleaded, "You two making an entrance together as a couple would blow… everyone… _away_! Can you imagine the look on Britt and Mercedes' faces? And oh my god, I would pay money to see Finn's."

"We're not your freak show," Quinn cautioned, then turned to Rachel. "And I'm not referring to either of us as freaks, sweetie."

Rachel smiled good-naturedly in return. The use of the word 'freak' hadn't even registered in her brain, despite all the times it had been used to refer to her specifically back in high school. Perhaps it was a testament to their new relationship, Rachel thought, though she still appreciated Quinn's sensitivity all the same.

"Come on, it will be fun," said Santana. "We can all sit around a booth and laugh at the fools who are still stuck in glee with Mr. Schue."

Quinn smirked and then appeared to be mulling it over in quiet contemplation for a moment before she looked back towards Rachel. "Rach, what do you think?"

"I think it would be fun to see everyone," said Rachel, shrugging her shoulders but adding a hint of approval in her voice. She was kind of already looking forward to appearing as a couple to their friends. The attention sounded like fun, minus the wounded puppy dog eyes from Finn.

"Settled!" said Santana, who then turned and waved down a taxi. She gave a hug to each of them and opened the door to the yellow cab that pulled up beside them. "I'll see you bitches in Ohio!"

* * *

 **A/N: Sooo, that chapter took a long time! Sorry. It's been... a particularly difficult year for me so far. Family health crisis has played havoc with my focus. I am still very much committed to finishing this fic though, and I** **thank you for continuing to read it.** **Hope you enjoyed the update on this 1 year anniversary of the day I published the first chapter(!). Kisses.**


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